


there's a hunger within these wounded hearts

by theletterdee



Series: Welcome Home - Matthew/Alice Soulmate Marked AU [1]
Category: The Doctor Blake Mysteries
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/M, Gen, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-15
Updated: 2018-09-08
Packaged: 2019-03-31 13:47:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 55,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13976415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theletterdee/pseuds/theletterdee
Summary: Set in the same universe as rahleeyah's A Messy Kind of Love and written with her permission, focusing on Alice Harvey and Matthew Lawson as they discover what it means to have soulmates after rough childhoods, and what it means when they discover they are each others' soulmate.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [rahleeyah](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rahleeyah/gifts).
  * Inspired by [A Messy Kind of Love](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12630090) by [rahleeyah](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rahleeyah/pseuds/rahleeyah). 



> a semi-sort of sequel to AMKOL, that is, it's set afterwards, and this fic has a few nods to what happens in it. So if you haven't read it: 1. you're missing out and 2. it's a fantastic story that kept me waiting eagerly for each new chapter as it unfolded, seriously you won't regret it.

She was told of the marking in a passing remark from her mother about how once she turned eighteen she’d start seeing the scars, scrapes, and bruises of the person she was meant to be with for the rest of her days. If their bond was particularly strong, she would feel their pain. Alice regarded the marking with suspicion as she grew older; her tumultuous household showed her earlier that love was not the beautiful sweeping courtship so often shown in books and art. Love hurt. Her mother’s love for her father kept her with a drunken bully who didn’t care about leaving marks on his wife’s skin, or the skin of his children.

 

After she turned twelve, after the night when Alice finally had enough of her father’s abuse, when her mother’s apathy at her children’s suffering had pushed her eldest daughter over the edge; Alice ran away from the only home she knew, she was all too glad that the marking didn’t happen until after her eighteenth birthday. It would have been too cruel to force her childhood on someone she didn’t even know.

 

Not that Alice believed she’d ever get someone. She turned eighteen and while her body bore scars, they were her own. She believed in science, she believed in the marking, science couldn’t explain the phenomenon, but Alice put her faith in what she  _ could _ see. No new marks appeared and a very small part of her grew heavy with disappointment. She didn’t believe she’d get a soulmate, but she’d hoped she was wrong.

 

When the war began, she couldn’t escape it in the latter half of her schooling as more and more of her classmates left, some never returning. Her hands started to develop calluses that weren’t pathology related. She woke some days to bruised knuckles and scrapes on her forearms. It seemed fate chose someone for her after all.

 

Whomever it was, they stayed safe. From the bruises and scrapes, Alice hazard a guess that her soulmate was a soldier, serving in the war. Thankfully, their time at the front never harmed them harshly. Her soldier was incredibly lucky, aside from the bruises and odd bullet graze (those always stung sharply when she received those marks), Alice almost forgot that she had a soulmate. 

 

The war ended and Alice moved on from her schooling to take up pathology full time. She found more comfort in the dead than she did the living. The living were… complicated, the dead were dead. Her soulmate picked a relatively quiet life after the war (Alice couldn’t help - and didn’t want to talk about - the increase in her heartbeat, thudding hard against her ribcage when the marks continued after the end of the war, they were alive), their marks coming every so often in the form of bruised and bloodied knuckles, abrasions, and the occasional sharp slice of a knife.

 

Life went on. Alice buried herself in her work, never actively seeking out her soulmate. It wasn’t that she ignored them, no, on her more stressful nights she’d trail her fingers over the calluses and older scars, grounding her in a way she couldn’t do on her own. She never actively sought them because something inside her told her they’d find each other. It was a feeling she couldn’t explain. It was something she didn’t exactly like, her life built on science and hard facts, but it helped her focus on crawling her way up through a male-dominated field. 

 

Jobs in pathology for a woman doctor were scarce and so Alice found herself traveling often, never in one place for very long. She considered going back into research, maybe go back and see how her old mentor was doing in Melbourne, when notice came of an opening in Ballarat. That feeling that she couldn’t explain, the one that helped her focus and comforted her on harder days, flared to life in her chest after lying dormant for years. It settled in between her ribs and pulled, calling her to the sleepy gold-rush town. Before her mind caught up to what her heart told her to do, Alice filled out an application for the pathologist opening and sent it to the hospital. Who knew what adventure lie in wait for her.

 

* * *

 

Always a quiet boy, Matthew listened to the Father’s explanation of the marking with rapt attention. He looked forward to turning eighteen, relished that he’d have someone there for him, even if not physically. He’d had friends come and go, more of them leaving than staying (a stray thought in the back of his mind wondered if Lucien would ever remember him), and with McAvoy belting him every chance he got, Matthew definitely looked forward to having someone on his side. He waited, the thought of his future marking and soulmate beating a regular tattoo around his head through the scuffles with McAvoy, the pervading disappointment his father held for him every time he came home with another black eye or bruised abdomen and didn’t stick up for himself, and the slowly disappearing funds his father used on gambling and drinking.

 

He took care of his younger sister, Vera, and looked after his worn down mother as his father stayed out later and later, and McAvoy’s fists hit harder and harder. In the back of his mind, Matthew was glad the marking didn’t happen before eighteen, he didn’t wish any of his past on another person, let alone his soulmate. His eighteenth birthday passed and he waited as patiently as he could for the marking. It would take a couple of years, but eventually Matthew woke up to strange calluses he never remembered acquiring and sometimes he felt the tiny pinpricks of pain that usually accompanied the sharp nails of cats.

 

He’d had a laugh at that; his soulmate owned a cat, and a fiesty one at that. Accompanying the scratch marks and calluses, he often could feel the tight, bruising pain of someone’s hands wrapping around his biceps or forearms. The dark blue-green and purple bruises in the shape of fingers troubled him, his own memories of bullies resurfacing unintentionally. On those days, Matthew tended to snap more, his heart aching at the thought of someone manhandling the other person on the end of the thin string of fate tying the two of them together. Sometimes - later more and more - bruises formed on his knuckles after the bruises on his arms and a burst of pride warmed his chest. Whomever they were, they were a fighter.

 

War broke out and Matthew’s police training momentarily derailed as he signed up to fight the Germans. Basic training left him with more scrapes, bruises, and sore muscles than he’d ever experienced up until this point in his life. He relished in the ache in his muscles, glad he could do something in the war effort. He knew his soulmate could feel it too and so Matthew made an effort to take care of himself more than he probably would have normally. 

 

His soulmate was careful and cautious, never really injuring themselves. Sometimes Matthew forgot he had a soulmate, but they’d sneak back into his thoughts with the tiny pricks of pain on his fingertips - a sewing needle - and the claws of their cat kneading on his shoulders or stomach. When he finally was sent abroad for the war, he took comfort in these brief insights into his soulmate, relieved when they were never seriously injured. They were safe.

 

Matthew survived the war relatively unscathed, unlike some of his brothers in arms, and gladly returned to Australia to try to pick up the pieces of his former life. He resumed his police training, keeping his head down as he worked his way up through the ranks in the years after the war. His soulmate’s calluses, thin and oddly placed on his fingertips, toughened, the hand marks on their arms sometimes returned, but not as often as they had been before the war. 

 

Matthew returned his fair share of marks, particularly in his days as a constable in Melbourne and later his hometown of Ballarat. Stubborn suspects often gave him a hard time, assuming his quiet nature for weakness. He set them right, usually coming out with bruised knuckles in the end. As he rose in the ranks, the bruised and bleeding knuckles happened less as the paperwork increased.

 

His work as Chief Superintendent had him behind a desk more than he liked, but Matthew took the limitation in stride. The marks he shared with his soulmate were more papercuts than bruises and by the amount of stinging small cuts they gave him, Matthew assumed they shared his pain in the neverending paperwork. On the worst days, or the days he felt would never end, Matthew had half a mind to pack up everything and go find his soulmate. He knew time would bring them together eventually, but another part of him pushed to follow that pull in his chest towards them. Matthew tamped down on that part, he was a patient man and time would tell who his soulmate was meant to be. All he had to do was wait.

 

1958 arrived and with it an old childhood friend, Lucien Blake, now a doctor and his usual jovial outlook on life shadowed by the war and his mysterious life in the decades since they’d last seen each other. After his father’s death, Lucien took over the medical practice and police surgeon role Thomas Blake had left vacant; the younger, more scandalous Blake quickly becoming a permanent fixture in Matthew’s police station.

 

Lucien left for China unexpectedly and left those closest to him to pick up the pieces. Life quieted in the months of his absence and then settled into a routine. Parks got called to Melbourne, Charlie Davis sent in his stead to keep an eye on things in Ballarat, Mattie dove into social work, and Jean kept the Blake household running until Lucien returned. She stopped by the police station often, making sure Matthew ate and took a well needed break. He was glad for her company, happy that she and Lucien had finally found each other (and now those rebuffs to his date offers years before made sense, she was waiting for her soldier, for Lucien), and so took her home cooking without complaint and listened to the gossip she provided him on his lunch breaks.

 

Nearly three months passed and Lucien arrived back in Ballarat just in time for the newly re-elected mayor to be murdered and his old friend cooking up conspiracy theories around Tyneman’s involvement.

 

_ “Glad I’m back?” Lucien’s cheeky grin managed to rise a slight smile out of Matthew. _

 

_ “I’ll let you know.” _

 

Lucien settled back into their strangely knit group with the ease of a cat on a windowsill in the sun. He certainly made Matthew’s job a little harder, but he welcomed the challenge after so many months of monotony. Word got to him of a new pathologist by way of Mattie, who stopped by to drop off a thermos of tea from Jean one night, and Matthew conveniently forgot to tell his old friend about Doctor Harvey.

 

_ “You knew about her?” _

 

_ “I hear she takes some getting used to.” _


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alice finally arrives in Ballarat, Matthew and Alice meet for the first time! Goes up to the end of 2.08ish when Matthew's called to Melbourne

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all so much for the kudos and reviews! much thanks to rahleeyah for betaing and commenting (and reminding me that I'm not just writing these two falling for each other, but also that there's the soulmate aspect of it that I keep forgetting to mention lmao)

Lucien Blake wasn’t at all what Alice expected. She’d heard the rumors, listened to what people told her, but as someone who lingered on the edges of any social group, Alice knew she’d leave her judgements until after actually meeting the man. He completely turned all of her expectations upside down. He was strange, not at all like the other men she’d come across in her work and Alice wasn’t sure what to make of it.

 

She loved pathology, loved the study of death and figuring out the puzzle behind unexplained death. Being around Lucien amplified that love. Alice soon found herself thinking of different theories, looking for clues that didn’t always fit the norm whenever she and Lucien were on a case. Working with him grew comfortable, their easy banter over dead bodies emboldened her, reigniting the excitement of her profession over and over again in the weeks since she moved to Ballarat. She even attended his wedding to Jean Beazley - now Blake - after a month of knowing him.

 

Which is why it hurt when he snapped at her over the body of Sid Bartel. She hid it of course, like she always did when she suddenly became an annoyance to people. She was used to being too much, too brash, but not to someone like Lucien. He’d embraced her oddities with open arms, never pushing, never prying more than she was comfortable with. In all their conversations about their personal lives, Lucien always waited for her to offer up any tidbits. In her hurt, she snapped back at him, asking if Mrs. Blake had burned his toast with enough venom in her voice that it cowed both of them into an uneasy silence for the remainder of the autopsy.

 

She was still smarting from their tiff as she got ready for bed. Idle hands ran over the calluses of her soulmate, attempting to soothe her mind over what happened. Feeling the rough skin beneath her fingertips grounded her and Alice found herself drifting off into an uneasy sleep as her mind replayed the conversation in the morgue over and over. As such, it was only a few hours rest she got when her telephone rang.

 

“Alice Harvey,” she rasped into the receiver, drawing her robe further closed around her body as Lucien’s tired voice crackled along the line, requesting her presence in the morgue. Alice sighed and promised she’d be there shortly, dropping the phone into its cradle with little fuss. She pulled on the first clothes she could get her hands on, expertly pinned her curls back from her face and applied her makeup with a well practiced hand before driving to the morgue.

 

“It’s three in the morning!” she announced as she pushed the door open, stopping short at the sight of a very dirty Lucien Blake and a man she’d only been introduced to from afar: Chief Superintendent Matthew Lawson. The two of them were already having a go at an autopsy. “And you started without me.”

 

They both had the decency at least to look sheepish, like two schoolboys caught in the act of mischief.

 

“Who is he?”

 

“Andrew Morgan, twenty-eight,” Lawson answered instead of Lucien and Alice looked up at him sharply. “Otherwise known as ‘Handy Andy’,” he gestured to the missing finger on the body’s right hand.

 

“That’s almost funny.”

 

Lawson’s eyes widened slightly in surprise, but Alice caught the slight upward twitch of his mouth and found herself returning it even in her annoyance at the late hour. She’d heard about Lawson too, the quiet, gruff police officer who was a childhood friend of Lucien’s before Lucien moved. Most people thought him tough, a man who scowled almost permanently, but Lucien painted a picture of a man with a dry sense of humor, a deep well of emotion and practical mind underneath the gruff exterior. Alice was intrigued.

 

* * *

 

He’d heard about Doctor Alice Harvey from Mattie - and later Lucien - but he hadn’t actually met her until this night. Her presence was immediate; it didn’t fill the room much like Lucien’s did right off the bat, instead it unfurled slowly, growing with each step into the morgue. This was her sanctuary, here was the place she felt the most confident, even at an unexpected hour. She met them at the stainless steel autopsy table, her heels clipping across the tiled floor. The lateness of the hour didn’t seem to affect her other than mild annoyance. 

 

Matthew could practically see the wheels turning in Doctor Harvey’s head as she and Lucien worked out Andrew Morgan’s cause of death and explanations for various marks across his body. He watched her as she worked; razor-sharp focus while examining the body, tossing theories back and forth with Lucien. The only other person he’d seen this curious about death in his life was Lucien, and Doctor Harvey put his curiosity to shame. It intrigued him, and was… oddly endearing.

 

Matthew honestly was paying attention to Lucien’s spiel, but he found himself watching curiously as Doctor Harvey examined Morgan’s neck with her hands, a thin furrow of concentration between her brows as she worked. His eyes traveled further over her face, noting the sharp cheekbones softened by faint freckles, and the line of her neck and collarbones. Her blue-gray eyes, intense even at three in the morning, looked up from the victim to meet his gaze. Matthew ducked his head, his ears growing hot after being caught staring. Mattie and Lucien hadn’t told him that Doctor Harvey was pretty.

 

“Minimal damage to the vertebrae,” Alice supplied.

 

“Yes,” Lucien agreed.

 

Matthew looked between the two of them, eyebrows raised.

 

“It means there was full flexion of the neck at the time of death,” Alice explained, rounding the table to shrug into one of the white coats hanging by the door. Matthew caught of whiff of her perfume as she walked past him, a faint floral underneath the chemicals of the morgue. It was a strange mixture of scents, but fit her.

 

Lucien elaborated on Alice’s proclamation, painting a picture of the differences between Sid Bartel’s death and the man before them. Matthew listened, but he was keenly aware of Alice’s location as she moved around behind him. His ears picked up the sound of running water and assumed she was washing her hands as Lucien had done once they’d arrived with the body.

 

This… fixation with Doctor Harvey was interesting to say the least. He wasn’t sure what brought it on and why with her. Perhaps it was the fact they hadn’t met face to face yet, or perhaps it was because it was late and he was tired from digging up a grave, but whatever it was, Matthew couldn’t help but sneak glances at her under the guise of looking down at the body. He and Lucien chatted, Matthew informing his old friend of Morgan’s missing brother as the water turned off behind them and Alice dried her hands.

 

“I’ll leave you to it,” Matthew sighed, knowing both were itching at the bit to get properly started. Besides, he had a missing person to search for, preferably from his desk at the police station. Sticking his hands more firmly in his pockets, Matthew quirked a smile at Lucien and turned on his heels. He nodded in passing to Alice, throwing a quick farewell over his shoulder at the two of them as he left. Matthew caught the curious tilt of Alice’s head as he exited and something… blossomed in his chest, a feeling he couldn’t explain. Shaking it off, he made his way back to the police station.

 

There was work to be done.

 

* * *

 

Matthew fought the urge to chew on the inside of his cheek as he looked up at Ballarat West. The building, familiar and steadfast just as it had been during his tenure, loomed overhead, the sounds and smells setting off long-buried memories in his mind. Instead, Matthew clenched his fists tight, fingernails biting into calloused palms (a nervous tick of his childhood that made him wonder if his soulmate ever noticed, he tried not to leave marks, but it was so second nature he didn’t realize what he was doing) and shoved them deep into his trouser pockets. The muscles in his jaw tightened with each step inside the school. He honestly hoped never to return here, but his job brought him back.

 

Lucien picked up on his discomfort, but his usual enthusiasm to figure out every mystery he set his sights on thankfully had been put tempered as the two of them walked towards the headmaster’s office. It was business as usual, Lucien speculating on cause of death, Matthew doling out orders to Charlie as the evidence started compiling into a threadbare scenario of the headmaster’s demise. Charlie came back into the office after rounding up some of the staff, mentioning a deputy head with bruised hands. Matthew raised his eyebrows, this case might be more straightforward than they thought.

 

_ “The name’s McAvoy.” _

 

Matthew lurched, the bottom of his stomach falling at the mere mention of that name. Donald McAvoy. The more things changed, the more they stayed the same. This time, Matthew gave into the urge to chew on the inside of his cheek, mentally steeling himself to face his childhood bully yet again and ignoring the curious looks on Lucien and his constable’s faces as he stalked out of the office. 

 

The years had not been kind to Donald McAvoy. Matthew straightened his spine, pleased to note that he was now taller than his old bully. It didn’t help much, but it made Matthew feel better. Ordering McAvoy around didn’t hurt either.

 

He ignored the balled up fist in his pocket, nails sinking deeper into the skin of his palm, showing his true feelings about the abrupt twist in this investigation. He’d deal with it later.

 

* * *

 

Matthew knew his anger was getting the better of him. He knew it and yet did nothing to stop it. McAvoy’s mere presence stirred up old memories long undisturbed and Matthew did not care for the feelings that resurfaced after all these years. He barked orders at his men, glared at anyone who dared to question them, and ignored the ache in his chest at the hurt on more than one face.

 

Vengeance seized his reasoning, making him rash, fixing his eye on only one possible person capable of murdering the headmaster. The burning desire to see McAvoy locked up - and pay for his past sins, not in the least the grief Matthew suffered at his hands - had him lashing out even at Lucien and Dr. Harvey.

 

He took the folder from her with more force than necessary. Poison was not what he was expecting as the cause of death for killing Lennox. It didn’t fit with McAvoy’s personality and it went against what Lucien told him earlier after the autopsy.

 

‘ _ He did say to wait for the tests _ ,’ Matthew’s mind reminded him. He chewed on the inside of his cheek in annoyance, pushing the nagging voice aside.

 

“So the blows to the body would have only killed him with poison in him?”

 

“Yes, but it was a long term exposure to the poison that did it.” Lucien wiped his hands dry with a towel and walked over to the coat rack by the door, shrugging out of his lab coat.

 

“Warfarin?”

 

“Yes. Blood thinners, but again, significant doses. Rat poison most likely.” Lucien threw on his suit coat and reached out to placate him.

 

Matthew jerked away; he didn’t want to be placated. “That’s a pesticide.”

 

“Rodenticide, technically,” Dr. Harvey piped up from the other side of the body.

 

Technicalities were not what he wanted. What he wanted was McAvoy locked up for good. What he wanted was a stiff drink. What Matthew wanted was some peace and quiet, but with the added element of poison to this murder, he knew he wouldn’t get any of that any time soon.

 

“Yes, thank you, Dr. Harvey,” he snapped as he handed her back the blood report, instantly regretting it as she bowed her head and stepped back.

 

All Matthew felt capable of in this investigation was losing his temper. Kicking his own arse internally, Matthew quickly made his excuses and left. He’d have to come back and apologize later for his behavior. Matthew had only known Doctor Harvey for a few weeks, but he knew she didn’t deserve that. 

 

No one did.

 

* * *

 

Alice looked down at the sample in her microscope without actually seeing it. She couldn’t focus and it was starting to grate on her nerves.

 

Superintendent Lawson snapped at her, so what? They weren’t close, barely even spoke, why should his demeanor bother her? She was used to men thinking she was unnecessary, too bold, too cold, too…  _ much _ on any given day, why should the opinions of a police officer matter to her? She didn’t need his approval. She had her own confidence, and the confidence of Lucien, and that was all she needed.

 

It was all she needed, but she still couldn’t stop the sinking in her heart at Lawson’s shortness with her the other day in the morgue. Why did his opinion matter? What about  _ him _ made Lawson different?

 

A rap on the doorframe and a cleared throat pulled Alice from her thoughts. She turned on her stool and saw the subject of them standing in the doorway. 

 

She’d never seen Lawson out of his uniform.

 

‘ _ And why would you? _ ’ her mind berated her even as she swept her gaze over his casual sweater vest and the unbuttoned top buttons of his white shirt underneath. ‘ _ It’s not like your paths cross outside of work _ .’

 

“Can I help you?” Her voice more waspish than she intended and she bit her tongue when he ducked his head sheepishly.

 

“I suppose I deserve that,” Lawson entered the morgue, stopping on the other side of the stainless steel table. “Doctor Harvey… I… I wanted to apologize for how I acted the other day. I was in a bad mood and I took it out on you. You didn’t deserve that.”

 

Alice slid from her stool and joined him at the table, her arms crossing subconsciously as a way to shield herself. Never before had a man apologized for being abrupt with her, at least not until she started working with Lucien. Lawson wasn’t Lucien, though. Lawson was different.

 

“Thank you for the apology, Superintendent.”

 

A shy smile spread across his face; she thought it made him look years younger. “You’re welcome, Doctor.”

 

He turned to leave, but her curiosity had yet to be sated. “Why?”

 

“Beg pardon?” Lawson stopped short, turning back to her with a furrowed brow.

 

“Why were you in a bad mood?”

 

He looked surprised at her question, but not annoyed. The hotspot on the inside of her cheek stung, another reminder of her soulmate - a nervous habit of chewing on their cheek - she’d hazard a guess.

 

“You genuinely want to know?”

 

Alice sighed, “No, I asked simply to be nice. Yes, I want to know.”

 

She expected a glare, a raised voice, or even him leaving in a huff. She didn’t expect the soft laugh and the boyish grin. His eyes were bright under the morgue lamps, shining with mirth.

 

“Lucien didn’t tell me about your bedside manner, Doctor.”

 

“I’d imagine he wouldn’t, seeing as he’s been on the receiving end of it one too many times for his liking.”

 

Lawson laughed again, and the sound of it reverberated in her ribs. “Doctors make the worst patients.”

 

She returned his smile this time, her shoulders relaxing now that the yelling wasn’t going to happen. An easy silence - another unexpected occurrence in their conversation - settled over the two of them. Alice watched him carefully, watched as a series of minute emotions rolled across his face. Something had happened to him, something that was hard to talk about, something buried deep only to resurface when you least expected it. Alice knew the feeling all too well, and so she waited for Lawson to speak when he felt ready.

 

“I… I went to Ballarat West for school, it’s where I met Lucien actually,” Lawson’s voice was soft, even in the still air between them. He didn’t look at her as he spoke, “He was my first true friend. We were the unlikely sort of friends, came from completely different worlds, but that didn’t matter to him.”

 

Alice smiled at the thought of a younger, blonder Lucien Blake, just as kind and boisterous as he was now, pulling a quiet Matthew Lawson behind him as they got into mischief.

 

“He found me one day, in a stairwell, out of breath. I told him I’d smoked a cigarette, but really it was because McAvoy… belted me. It happened a lot and I never told Lucien. I never told anyone. It continued after Lucien’s father sent him away and I buried it after I finished school. This case… brought it all back to the surface.”

 

“It certainly didn’t help that your childhood bully was in the middle of it all.”

 

Lawson looked up at her, his eyes searching hers. Alice shivered, it felt like he was looking straight down to her soul. His gaze softened and he nodded. Silence swept over them again, Matthew battling his past with his fists balled up in front of him on the table, and Alice torn between her instincts to pull up her walls or to let the person in front of her know just how much she understood. Tiny spots of pain stung her palms and she looked down to see crescents forming on her palms.

 

In the end, the desire to comfort won.

 

“I know what it’s like… to be bullied,” the surety in her voice startled her, but under the piercing eyes of Matthew Lawson she felt safe enough to  _ be _ sure. “Just like I know what it’s like to keep it to yourself because no one will believe you.”

 

Matthew nodded and something passed between them, a feeling of mutual understanding, of unseen kinship, that settled around their shoulders like a warm blanket. It was a feeling of not being alone in facing the demons of their pasts. He straightened to his full height and cleared his throat, “Can I start again? With you, I mean. I feel like we got off on the wrong foot.”

 

Alice smiled and ducked her head to hide it. She breathed deep and faced him again, “Both of us can.”

 

With a smile, Matthew stuck out his hand across the autopsy table, “Matthew Lawson.”

 

She grasped it, his palm warm and calloused against her cool fingers, “Alice Harvey. It’s nice to meet you.”

 

“Likewise.” With a squeeze, he let go and Alice missed the warmth already. “And I truly am sorry for how I spoke to you. There was no excuse for it.”

 

“I understand, you don’t have to explain yourself to me, Superintendent.”

 

“It’s Matthew, and I feel like I do, Doctor.”

 

Her eyes widened, but she took it in stride, “Alright… then it’s Alice.”

 

He smiled again and shifted his weight from foot to foot, “I’ll, uh… I’ll leave you to it, then, Alice.”

 

“Thank you, Matthew.”

 

She watched him leave, more confused than before. The conversation had shed some light onto the enigma of Matthew Lawson, but it just led to more questions than answers. Shaking her head, Alice sat back on her stool and returned to her samples. The mystery of one Chief Superintendent Matthew Lawson would have to wait for another day.

 

* * *

 

It would be weeks before Alice saw Matthew again. He rarely came down to the morgue and she rarely left, letting Lucien serve as the go between. It was late, she should have gone home hours earlier, but a backlog of paperwork kept her from doing just that. Alice rubbed at her eyes, wincing when her makeup stung, and tried to read the paragraph in front of her on the report again.

 

The hairs on the back of her neck rose and she felt someone watching her from the doorway of her small office off of the morgue. Alice tensed.

 

“It’s just me, Doctor Harvey,” Matthew’s voice calmed her and she looked up, her posture relaxing almost instantly. 

 

\--

 

Alice looked up and Matthew sucked in a quick breath at the sight. Those firebird curls hung loosely around her face, her hair pins losing the war as the night went on. Blue-grey eyes, maintaining their intensity even when tired and surrounded by smudged mascara, watched him expectantly.

 

Since when had Alice started to look this lovely to him?

 

He cleared his throat and looked down at his feet, hoping the warmth in his cheeks wasn’t obvious. “Might I come in?”

 

\--

 

Alice smiled at his shyness, her own cheeks turning pink as she tucked a stray curl behind her ear, “Please.”

 

He walked over to the chair by her desk, currently being used as an extension of her surface area to hold books and folders.

 

“I’m sorry, let me clear that for you,” She leaned over to pick up the pile just as Matthew reached down. Their fingers brushed and Alice snatched her hands back. It’d felt like an electric current when they touched and once the initial shock wore off, a warmth enveloped her body. She could feel her cheeks grow hot and avoided Matthew’s eyes as he redeposited the books to another chair. “Thank you.”

 

“It’s alright,” Matthew settled into the chair with a sigh, resting his arm on the edge of her desk. Alice shuffled some papers around, her hands shaking as she moved, and she couldn’t pinpoint the cause of her sudden nervousness around Matthew.

 

“What brings you by, Superintendent?”

 

“Matthew, please,” he insisted with another sigh, “I’m not on duty.”

 

“Very well. What brings you by, Matthew?” Alice sat up straighter and clasped her hands in front of her as she watched him. He seemed tired and by the slump of his shoulders, almost defeated.

 

Matthew rubbed the bridge of his nose, “I don’t really know… I think I need someone to talk to.”

 

A part of her, a quickly growing part since his apology, revelled in the fact that he chose her to come and talk instead of Lucien or Mrs. Blake. “I’ll certainly try my best.”

 

That got a smile from him, “You already are, Doctor.”

 

“Alice, please. I’m not on duty.”

 

Matthew’s smile widened at her parroted phrase, “Alice.”

 

She smiled back, “What… what did you need to talk about?”

 

Matthew looked down, the defeated look creeping back into his face and shoulders, “I’ve gotten a call from Melbourne. The higher ups are summoning me to face disciplinary charges.”

 

“Whatever for?” Alice hadn’t known Matthew for that long, but she at least knew he had a sense of honor.

 

“It’s politics, really. I’ve become inconvenient.”

 

“That’s  _ bullshit _ .”

 

His eyebrows raised in surprise and Alice simply gazed back at him. His mouth twitched upward, much like it had over the body of Andrew Morgan, and he ducked his head again, his shoulders shaking in silent laughter.

 

\--

 

Count on Alice Harvey to cut straight to the point. Matthew couldn’t help his amusement at her bold statement, and the fond smile that stayed on his face when her cheeks turned pink with embarrassment soothed his soul. Something in Matthew kept drawing him back to Alice; something pulled him towards her when normally he’d go to Lucien. It made  _ sense _ to go to Lucien. He was his oldest friend, but Matthew couldn’t burden Lucien with the Melbourne summons, not yet. Lucien would blame himself when it was really the larger police politics at play.

 

“Still,” Matthew sighed again, but his heart was a little lighter than before. “I’ll have to leave. I don’t know who’ll replace me.”

 

“Do you know how long you’ll be gone?”

 

“No. They’ve set up a special committee to oversee the charges, but it could take months to get through all the red tape and proceedings.”

 

“Have you told Lucien?”

 

He wordlessly shook his head. “He’ll think it was his fault, that and his righteous nature isn’t really what I need right now.”

 

Alice chuckled at that, “I’m sure he’d curtail it for you if he knew.”

 

“Nah, I just need to let it sink in for me before I tell him.”

 

He heard her take in a breath, readying herself to speak but she hesitated. This repeated a few more times before he felt a cool, shaking hand come to rest on top of his. Matthew looked up and saw the uncertainty in Alice’s eyes. He’d watched her interactions with Lucien and others in the weeks since she’d started and while she accepted physical touches from Lucien and maybe Jean, Alice shied away from it in general. She didn’t reach out to just anyone. It took a lot for her to do this, to reach out for physical contact in an effort to comfort someone. Matthew gently grasped her hand in his, his other coming to rest on top of her cool fingers. She followed his lead and their hands tangled on the dark wooden surface of her desk.

 

“I don’t know if I can  _ be _ of any help to you.”

 

“You already are.”

 

\--

 

Warmth spread from their joined hands and settled in her chest. Matthew’s hands were rough in hers, but his touch was gentle. She wasn’t sure what to make of it, not used to any sort of physical affection. Matthew’s touch was different from Lucien’s. With Lucien, touching those he cared about was second nature to him. Alice knew he held back, hesitated around her because she was not one for uninvited affection. But with Matthew, touching was a comfort, like it was something she both wanted and needed. He didn’t push; he let her decide. In the few short months they’d known each other, Matthew had figured her out in a way that a kindred soul would.

 

She enjoyed his company in the few instances they shared the same room and now he had to leave. “This isn’t fair.”

 

Matthew squeezed her hands, “I know. It’s politics.”

 

“It’s still not right.”

 

“It’s not,” he nodded. “Can I ask a favor from you?”

 

Alice nodded, shivering slightly at his thumb lightly rubbing her knuckles; he did it like it was out of instinct.

 

“Can you… can you keep an eye on Lucien? Make sure he doesn’t get into too much trouble?”

 

She laughed, not expecting that to be his favor at all. “As much as I can keep him out of trouble, he’s more likely to drag me along with him.”

 

“There’d be a sight to see,” Matthew laughed lightly. “You could charge admission.”

 

“Oh, very funny, Matthew,” she huffed. “I will try though. Lucien’s a handful, but maybe between Mrs. Blake and I we can manage.”

 

“Thank you.”


	3. Chapter 3

Matthew had been gone for weeks now. Doug Ashby served as the interim Superintendent, pulled out of retirement for a few cases while the higher ups in Melbourne decided who’d replace Matthew.

 

Alice didn’t like his replacement. William Munro was pushy, demanding, and indifferent to how long science took. There was a process and procedure to doing an autopsy and Alice didn’t appreciate anyone trying to rush her. No, she did not like Munro at all.

 

Luckily, she had little to do with him. Lucien took the brunt of morgue-police interactions and she was all too thankful for it. She tried to keep him out of trouble, the favor she promised to Matthew always lurking in the back of her mind, but Lucien as always had a mind of his own. And so, life continued on in Matthew’s absence. Alice found her mind drifting to him periodically, the memory of his quiet, stoic presence in the morgue or her office kept her going on the tougher days.

 

She couldn’t pinpoint her fascination with the former superintendent and all too often her mind kept her awake as it chewed over why her thoughts came back to Matthew more and more with each day, and focused less and less on her soulmate. The old feeling, the one that brought her to Ballarat in the first place had receded, lying dormant for weeks at a time, and the guilt over her growing feelings - feelings she didn’t really know how to name, or _want_ to name - with Matthew Lawson kept her up night after night.

 

* * *

 

Wandering hands, she was no stranger to them, having dealt with it all throughout medical school and after. She learned to put up walls, to close herself off so no one would even think her approachable. Alice fell back on what she knew, drawing herself in for protection whenever Doctor Orton made advances. His vise-like grip on her wrists or upper arms chilled her to the bone, but she put her foot down. Ballarat was now her home, she had friends here and a job she enjoyed. She wasn’t going to let a lecherous man ruin it all for her.

 

On the days when Orton’s hands bruised, Alice watched tiny, stinging crescents appear in her palms and her heart went out to her soulmate. What it must be like to see the bruises appear and not be able to do anything? Alice readied her complaint, even as she hid it all from Lucien and the others.

 

* * *

 

The days in Melbourne felt longer than they ever did in Ballarat. Matthew’s sanity and patience stretched thin as they dragged him through the coals day after day about his tenure as Chief Superintendent. It didn’t help that the hand bruises from his soulmate had returned.

 

He clenched his fists so tight on those days that his knuckles ached.

 

He wanted to _do_ something, whether it was return to police work or go seek out his soulmate and pummel the person hurting them until his hands bled. The endless hearings prevented him from doing anything outside of touching base with Charlie about the new Superintendent, William Munro.

 

And if he happened to pay closer attention whenever Charlie mentioned the good Doctor Harvey, that was pure coincidence.

 

With Charlie keeping tabs on Munro, and keeping Lucien in the dark as much as it pained Charlie to do so, Matthew had little do except wait for Munro to slip up and give them the evidence to support it. He had faith in his senior constable. Charlie was a good man and an even better investigator, he’d sniff out the dirt on Munro soon enough.

 

The whiskey burned in his throat as he took a sip. Usually the small nightcap helped him feel at ease at the end of the day, but even the familiar warmth of the alcohol did little to settle his nerves. Matthew bounced his leg out of habit, trying to bleed off the impatience as he looked over the notes before him. His thoughts were distracted, his mind circling back to the memory of Alice’s red curls haloed by the low light of her office, her tired pale eyes, the faint freckles on her face and neck. Her laugh, low and raspy in the late hour of that night, filled his ears. Matthew smiled, even as he shook his head to banish the vision of Alice from his mind to concentrate.

 

Try as he might he couldn’t relax or focus tonight. He kept feeling like something was going to happen, it thrummed in the air like an electric current. He set the tumbler aside and leaned over the table covered in his notes, trying to make sense of them all. Wondering just how Munro would slip up, Matthew reached for the latest information from Charlie, when the ghost of a large hand closed over his throat.

 

Panic rose in him as the pain intensified and he struggled to breathe. Matthew coughed, his throat tightening and he knocked the tumbler to the ground as he stumbled into the small bathroom of his Melbourne apartment. Matthew gripped the sink with trembling hands and in the mirror above it, he watched the slowly reddening finger marks appear across the front of his neck.

 

Ire flooded him even as he fought to breathe evenly. The tightness in his throat remained and Matthew quelled the urge to hit something. His soulmate was in danger and he couldn’t do anything about it. Darkly, he wondered if it was the same person who bruised his soulmate’s arms. Whomever it was, they had large hands, the pressure nearly encompassed his entire throat, putting pressure on both arteries in his neck, and Matthew felt his vision go fuzzy at the edges. His soulmate wasn’t getting enough air and he’d no idea where they were or what was going on.

 

Forgoing his usual ironclad control, the mirror in front of him splintered under his fist. He instantly regretted it as the pain lanced up his arm. In his anger - and with the new throbbing pain of his bruised and bloodied knuckles - the pressure on his throat slackened. Matthew’s hands shook as he wrapped his right hand in a towel. He ignored the broken mirror and sat down heavily on the toilet, his face in his uninjured hand as the adrenaline in his system left him shaking.

 

The anger left him, and guilt replaced it. He’d been thinking of Alice when this happened. The war in his thoughts over his soulmate and Alice Harvey echoed the war in his heart. He was fond of Alice, Matthew knew that much. In their short time together, he’d come to admire her tenacity, her blunt nature, and methodical work ethic. He’d come to admire _her_ in the few conversations they had.

 

His fondness for Alice warred with the fondness for his soulmate, who lurked in the back of his mind whenever fresh bruises showed up or when he bit on his cheek. They’d started to mirror his nervous habit, a hotspot appearing on the right side of his mouth over the past few weeks. The feeling in his chest, the one that pulled him to his soulmate, had dulled since he arrived in Melbourne, where before it flared into life at odd times as he moved around his home city of Ballarat. Matthew wanted, more than anything, to go and find them, but first he had to reconcile the feelings he had for his soulmate and the growing feelings he had for Alice.

 

* * *

 

Alice woke to Lucien and Mattie’s concerned faces hovering above her and the dark wooden ceiling of the Colonist’s Club beyond them. “Oh God…”

 

Relief washed over their faces and they helped her sit up slowly. Alice winced through the dull pounding in her head and the pulsing throb of her right hand.

 

“You alright, Alice?” Lucien’s voice, soothing and low, broke through the bombastic military tattoo in her head and Alice nodded gingerly.

 

“My head hurts and so does my hand, but I’ll live.”

 

“You almost didn’t.”

 

Alice leveled a small glare at him, even as her shaking fingers came up to probe her sore and swelling throat. The bruised skin ached, but Alice would live.

 

Lucien pulled her up and sat her down at a nearby table while Mattie got a finger of whiskey for Alice to sip on while she recovered. Lucien didn’t let go of her right hand even as Alice tried to tug it out of his grasp.

 

“Bloody hell, Alice, it looks like you decked someone with this hand!”

 

She finally pulled it from his grasp with a sharp tug, but she had to agree with him. Her breath caught in her throat at the sight of her bruised and battered knuckles. In the darkening purple bruises, tiny red scratches zig zagged haphazardly across her pale skin. Alice blinked back tears, the waning adrenaline in her system made her shake and feel weepy. Her soulmate had felt what happened to her, she had no doubt it was them behind the state of her hand, and her heart went out to them. The knuckles were likely fractured, maybe even broken, and from the cuts on the rough skin, Alice guessed that those were the result of punching something made of glass (likely a mirror, window glass would have cut deeper and other parts of her arm). Alice hoped they were alright even as she clutched her own shaking hands tightly. She sniffed and pulled herself together just in time for Mattie to return.

 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Mattie asked as she set the glass down in front of Alice.

 

“I am,” she sighed, her voice hoarse. Alice took a bigger sip than she intended and winced at the burn and the flex of muscles in her throat as she swallowed.

 

“I’m still not certain you are,” Lucien drawled, his blue eyes watching her carefully, curiosity glittering in them alongside the concern.

 

Alice rolled her eyes as she downed the rest of the whiskey. “I’m more embarrassed than anything else, Lucien.”

 

“You’re sure?”

 

Lucien held up his hands in surrender when she glared at him again, this time strong enough to strip paint. Mattie laughed under her breath beside Alice. The district nurse had wormed her way under Alice’s walls much like Mrs. Blake and Lucien in the months since Alice’s arrival in Ballarat. She liked it, Mattie reminded her of the good times she’d had with her sister. Alice enlisted Mattie’s help to _finally_ get the body moved off of the club’s billiard table and treated with respect. She was just glad something finally returned to normalcy after this whole strange affair.

 

Later that night once she was home and after she’d removed her makeup, let down her auburn curls, and changed into her pajamas, Alice finally got a look at the damage to her throat. Reddened finger marks were already darkening and Alice knew they’d be a rich purple-red - if not darker - by the morning. It still hurt to swallow, but she’d manage the discomfort. The bruises on her hand were another story. Her knuckles ached, the skin stretching uncomfortably every time she bent her fingers. A part of her, the one that called her to her soulmate, longed to reach out and find them, to know that they were okay, but never in her years in the medical field had she ever heard of a way how to talk to your soulmate until you physically met them.

 

* * *

 

Miles away, perched on the edge of his bed in his undershirt and boxers, Matthew toyed with his pocket knife. His right hand still throbbed, swaddled beneath stitches and a few yards of bandages by a doctor who wisely refrained from asking how his hand got this way in the first place. He wanted to reach out to his soulmate. The pressure on his throat had lifted, but his heart hammered in his chest at what the possible outcomes of that pressure being relieved meant. They were either fine or…

 

He didn’t want to think about the ‘or’.

 

The only problem with wanting to reach out to his soulmate was that he had no clue who they were. Matthew had heard of a way to contact your soulmate before meeting them. Rumors of it permeated his barracks and camps in the war. Lucien himself had all but confirmed it one night when the two of them had more drinks than they intended and the conversation took a darker turn. Matthew had grown up knowing that to purposefully mark yourself was a sin, a blasphemy against God himself.

 

But as the small pocket knife rested above the skin of his thigh, he knew what he wanted to say to his soulmate; he just couldn't bring himself to actually do it. Would his soulmate welcome more pain, more scars? Or would they be relieved as well in the knowledge that Matthew was safe?

 

Matthew imagined the knife descending, slicing into sensitive flesh to carve out one word with care and then the sound of his heartbeat as he waited for their reply.

 

' _Okay?_ ’ his would read.

 

' _Yes_ ,' theirs would come back, slowly, with a shaky hand, but still sure in the small incisions made to their own skin. ' _You?_ '

 

' _Better now,_ ' he'd reply, relief flooding his system, his tensed muscles relaxing with the knowledge that his soulmate was okay, they were alright and equally concerned about his hand as he was about their throat.

 

But he blinked and the knife trembled, poised above his skin. Matthew sighed and put it away. As much as he wanted to know, it was better this way for everyone involved.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this chapter centers around 3.06 "Women and Children" aka where Munro's an ass to our fave pathologist and we find out more about Alice's background. I hope you enjoy (and want to give Alice a hug after it like I do constantly) this chapter and the added Jean & Alice interaction that we definitely don't get enough of in the show.

Seeing the person who’d been manhandling her for months on the stainless steel autopsy table was not what Alice expected when she woke up this morning. His wandering hands, at least, had stopped weeks before his death. She’d filed her complaint; Beaufort threw it out, berated her for it, and the hospital started disciplinary charges against her. Her livelihood was spiraling out of control, but all she could think was at least Orton’s hands stopped.

 

Alice couldn’t tell Lucien,  _ wouldn’t _ tell him. She hated the sin of pride, but by God she had it in this instance. She was an independent woman, she knew how to protect herself, she didn’t need her esteemed male colleague - no matter how close of a friend he was - to step in and fight her battles in her stead. If she lost her job, Alice would deal with it. She always had before.

 

She clasped her hands in front of her, tight enough to pull at the still lingering bruises on her right hand. They’d faded to a pale green with the yellow-brown creeping in at the edges, just like the bruises fading on her throat. The faint ache of her bruises grounded her. As much as Alice would like to be anywhere else in the world than in the morgue at this very moment, Doctor Harvey still had her job to do.

 

Alice walked around the autopsy table slowly, feeling Munro’s eyes burning a hole into the back of her head. She reached the other side of Orton’s body, eyes fixed on the dead man’s face. 

 

“What’s  _ he _ doing here?” she whispered across the body to Lucien.

 

“God only knows,” he murmured back. “Ignore him.”

 

She tried her best, but the phantom of Munro’s presence lurked at the corner of her eyesight. He didn’t say much, thankfully, but he disturbed the natural ambiance of the morgue and their autopsy process.

 

‘ _ Matthew never felt like he was out of place here _ ,’ Alice caught herself thinking as she examined Orton’s clothes. ‘ _ I never minded  _ **_him_ ** _ being in the corner.  _ **_He_ ** _ never felt like he was invading _ .’

 

“Did you have much to do with Dr. Orton, Alice?”

 

Phantom fingers wrapped around her wrists and biceps, she blinked and they disappeared. Turning to Lucien, Alice pulled up her walls around him for the first time in months. “He was… a capable surgeon.”

 

It was all she could bear to make herself say about Orton in front of Lucien and Munro. Alice couldn’t look at her friend as she walked over to start the autopsy paperwork; she couldn’t bear to see the concerned glance he was certainly throwing her way.

 

What could she tell him? That Orton had wandering hands, that he liked to make sexual advances on women who were not his wife? That she’d filed a complaint and the hospital all but laughed in her face? That she was under disciplinary action for speaking out?

 

What was there to say?

 

* * *

 

_ “Alice, the woman’s just lost her husband.” _

 

_ “So I gathered.” _

 

Lucien was worried about her, she could see it in his eyes, hear it in the tone of his voice. Alice worried too, she felt herself closing off more and more each day as the case went on. Her walls were reforming, the distance increasing between the last few people who were actually talking to her in the hospital.

 

She hated the distance; all she’d ever longed for was a place where she was accepted. Ballarat seemed to fit that longing, seemed to fill the crater left inside her, the smoking ruins of her own family falling apart years ago. Alice wanted to reach out and tell Lucien what had happened between her and Orton, what the hospital was doing to her, but old habits never died easily. So, she retreated into herself, going through her job mechanically, waiting for all of this to blow over so that she could get back to what she liked doing best without the figurative sword of Damocles hanging overhead.

 

* * *

 

It didn’t blow over; it blew up.

 

Orton’s wife called and threatened her, so Alice told her what kind of a man she’d married. It wasn’t her best moment, but the pressure of the last few days finally broke through her steadfast control. 

 

Before she knew it, Alice had been requested to appear at the police station. She rarely set foot in this building, if at all. It wasn’t her place, it was Matthew’s sanctuary, but not for Alice. She sat across the laminate table from Munro and a confused Lucien. Her past months at the hospital were dragged out and aired in the light of the day. Alice tightened her fists, her short, blunt nails biting into the soft skin of her palms as tears gathered in her eyes. She wondered what her soulmate thought of her returning the stinging crescents she so often received from them.

 

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. She never intended for it to come out like this, for Lucien to hear about what Orton had done to her in a heated interrogation as accusations of murder flew at her from Munro. Alice found herself chewing on her inner lip as she fought to maintain her composure, as her hands shook, and her heart beat rapidly against her ribs.

 

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this at all.

 

_ “I thought when I grew up, I’d be safe.” _

 

Alice let her walls down, and with them everything came rushing out. The tears fell and Lucien’s whiskey burned her throat as she told him what happened in stilted, halting sentences. He comforted her, mindful of her aversion to touch, but the warmth of his hand on her back was all she needed from him. He drove her back to the hospital at her insistence. There was always paperwork to be done and her own car was there anyways.

 

She tried her best to distract herself in her work, but in the stillness of her office she broke down. More tears fell, tears she’d never let herself shed over her childhood, over the pressures of school, over the wandering hands that littered her past, and tears for Dr. Orton’s children as she sobbed over their lost innocence. A dam broke inside her and Alice let the waters run.

 

For the first time in the years since her marking began, Alice just wanted to leave. She wanted to run and seek out the feeling in her chest, to find her soulmate. She was tired of waiting, she was tired of the mystery; Alice wanted to know who they were. She sought comfort from the one person meant to be her other half; she wanted to know if they thought of her just as often as she thought of them. For the first time, Alice was tired of the walls around her heart.

 

(A part of her - one that she only dared to even think about in the late hours of the night - hoped that her soulmate had the same soul-piercing gaze of one Matthew Lawson, that their hands were rough, yet gentle, and their scowling mouth lifted in the corners just for her like Matthew’s did.)

 

Oh how she wished she could just pack up and leave and follow her heart, but Alice knew the process of a police investigation after months of working with Lucien. She couldn’t just leave in the middle of an investigation, and so she dried her tears and ran her fingers over the callouses on her palms. She’d just have to wait, like always.

 

* * *

 

Jean wasn’t quite sure what brought her to the door of one Doctor Alice Harvey, but when Lucien told her what had happened, Jean wanted to help. Adjusting her sweater and the small basket in her hands, Jean reached out and rapped three times on the dark green door.

 

She heard movement inside, followed by the sliding thunk of a lock. The door swung open slowly, Alice herself peering out from behind it. Her blue-grey eyes still held traces of yesterday’s makeup, smudged and lingering in the faint tear tracks on Alice’s pale cheeks. Alice rested her right hand on the door, her body half-hiding behind it, the bruises on her knuckles finally fading into a yellow-brown after the murder at the Colonist’s Club, the thin scars turning lighter with each passing day.

 

“Mrs. Blake?” Alice’s voice was rough, but quiet. Confusion etched into the furrow between her brows.

 

Jean smiled softly, “Lucien told me.”

 

The doctor sighed, her eyes closing as she leaned up against the door. Jean waited patiently, not wanting to push Alice further than she was comfortable with, and watched. Alice’s eyes opened up and she stepped back, opening the door to her flat further.

 

“Come on in, it’s rude of me to have you standing out on the step.”

 

“Not at all, Doctor Harvey, this is your home,” she protested, but accepted the invitation nonetheless at Alice’s insistence. 

 

Alice closed the door behind her and led Jean to her living room. She wrapped her robe further around herself and looked at the floor. “I wasn’t expecting word of my investigation to get around this fast, truth be told.”

 

The uncharacteristic shyness of Alice’s voice made Jean’s heart ache. This woman, this bold, unconventional woman who was always so sure about herself had taken a beating to her self-worth and she barely had anyone to turn to for help. Jean’s heart went out to her and she had to tamp down on the instinct to tuck Alice’s wild curls behind her ear as a mother would.

 

“It didn’t, Doctor Harvey. Lucien only told me because he worries about you.”

 

Alice sniffed and sucked both of her lips into her mouth, chewing slightly on them before she looked up at Jean with glassy eyes. “Why are you here?”

 

“I wanted you to know that you always have someone to talk to, if you want it. I know Lucien will always listen, but you have me too.”

 

Alice’s eyes widened slightly in surprise, and Jean’s heart ached again. What happened to Alice to cause that reaction? How many times was she given the cold shoulder simply because she didn’t fit societal norms? How many times had she been told she was too much, too bold, too  _ strange _ ?

 

“I… thank you, Mrs. Blake.”

 

“It’s Jean, please.”

 

A shy smile crossed Alice’s face and she ducked her head briefly to hide it. Jean wondered what amused her. The doctor raised her head and directed another small smile at Jean, “Then it’s Alice.”

 

“Glad to hear it.”

 

Alice’s posture relaxed minutely, her arms slacking as she uncrossed them from her robe. Underneath the aqua terry cloth material, Jean caught a glimpse of a simple pale yellow cotton pajama set and toenails painted a delicate pink peeking out from underneath the hem of her pajama bottoms. It made her smile.

 

“Would… you like some tea?” ” Alice cleared her throat, her softness fading and the uncertainty returning. Jean could almost see the walls building between them. It reminded her of her early run ins with Lucien, when his eyes held more shadows than light and he held people at arm’s length.

 

Those two were very similar, but Alice’s shadows ran deeper, tinging the very edges of her soul.

 

“That would be lovely,” Jean smiled again and she shifted her weight, something bumped against her hip and she remembered what she brought for Alice. “Oh! I brought some biscuits for you. I wasn’t sure what you liked, so they’re just shortbread.”

 

“Thank you, Jean,” The uncertainty remained, but Jean was a patient woman.

 

Alice led Jean into her small kitchen and walked over to the sink. As she started filling the kettle at the sink, Jean put her basket on the table.

 

“Would you like any help, Alice?”

 

“No thank you, Jean,” Alice flashed a smile over her shoulder, her hands moving on from filling the kettle to preparing the tea. As the water boiled, Alice set out two teacups (a yellow one for Jean, pale blue for herself), sugar, milk from the fridge, and a small pot of honey.

 

After years of service, Jean felt a little awkward being waited upon, but Alice insisted on doing it herself (“ _ It’s my home, Jean, let me do this for you _ ”). Few words were exchanged between the two of them as the tea steeped. Jean prepped her own cup, watching Alice curiously from time to time.

 

Her companion had relaxed, the routine of tea coupled with the quiet eased the slight tension in the air between them. Alice rested with her chin in her hand, staring out her window without actually seeing anything. She wasn’t pretty by conventional standards, but Alice certainly was striking and beautiful. Her wild scarlet curls, free around her head, softened the strong profile of her face and her cat-like eyes were a shade of pretty blue-grey. The faint speckling of freckles across her nose and sharp cheekbones tied it all together into a picture uniquely Alice.

 

Jean poured tea into their cups, startling Alice out of her thoughts and she added her milk and a spoonful of honey. The honey was unexpected to Jean, but fit with the enigma of Alice.

 

“Thank you… for coming, Jean,” Alice’s soft statement broke the silence between them. She didn’t speak at Jean, rather she spoke to her steaming cup of tea. “Besides Lucien, I don’t have many friends here.”

 

“I was happy to, Alice. I know what it’s like to feel alone.”

 

Alice looked up, her eyes questioning, and Jean indulged her curiosity. “My husband died in the war, leaving me with a farm and two boys to raise by myself. I was scared and so alone I thought I wouldn’t be able to go on. I did, I had to for my boys, but oh, I felt so alone. I felt like no one understood my pain and what I was going through at the time.”

 

“What helped?”

 

Jean blinked back tears, memories of her darker moments resurfacing in the quiet, sunlit kitchen of Alice’s flat. She smiled at Alice, her eyes shining, “Lucien did. I didn’t know it was him at the time, though.”

 

Alice frowned slightly and Jean knew she was turning over every piece of her story so far, trying to figure it out like an intricate puzzle. It was an odd-feeling, being analyzed, but if it put Alice’s mind at ease in the end, it was worth it. Alice’s eyebrows shot up after a few minutes and her entire face brightened as she made her discovery known.

 

“He’s your soulmate.”

 

‘ _ There it is, _ ’ Jean thought, hiding her smile in her tea cup as she took a sip. She nodded.

 

“How did he help?”

 

Jean set down her cup, wondering if she should tell Alice; there was no ulterior motive behind Alice’s eyes or in the tone of her voice. She was simply curious about it all. “How much do you know about the marking?”

 

Alice shrugged, “The basics. The marking begins after your eighteenth birthday, from then on you shall bear the scars, cuts, and bruises of your soulmate for as long as you live. If the bond is deep enough, you can also feel their pain.”

 

“We’re also taught that to purposefully mark yourself is a sin, to blaspheme against God for taking the marking into your own hands.”

 

“Is that what happened with you and Lucien?” Alice’s eyes watched her carefully, almost in fear, her words soft and slow. She was afraid of offending Jean with her questions, but Jean didn’t mind them. It actually felt like a weight lifting off of her chest again, like it had with her sister years ago.

 

Jean bit her lip and ran a finger around the rim of her cup, “Of a sorts. Our… bond was complicated from the beginning, but after Christopher’s death, he reached out to me. At that time, I didn’t care that my soulmate had carved into his own flesh to know he wasn’t alone because I knew what it was like. In writing to each other, we might have damned ourselves, but it was what we needed, what we craved. It felt right in the face of all I’d been told.”

 

Alice contemplated all Jean told her, sipping at her cooling tea. It was Jean’s turn to look out the window, her mind running through all the painful memories of her past that led up to this point of sitting across from a woman she never expected to care for, and certainly not this quickly. They were two sides of the same coin; one who played to society’s fiddle because she feared the backlash and ostracization of the town and the other who’d bucked those conventions and crawled her way up to achieve her dreams, who should not be friends, or even acquaintances, but were drawn to each other nonetheless.

 

“I can feel their pain,” Alice’s voice broke through Jean’s musings. “My soulmate, I mean.”

 

“It’s a rare gift that some days can be a curse,” Jean smiled wryly. “But it means your bond is stronger than most.”

 

“The night at the club, when that man grabbed me, I woke up to my hand like this,” Alice motioned to her still healing right hand. “It was them, I know it. They must have broken something, in the very least required stitches. I wanted to reach out to them, but I don’t know who they even are.”

 

“Do you want to know?”

 

“Yes… no… I don’t know,” Alice sighed. Jean could see a war going on behind Alice’s eyes, the same war she’d gone through herself before she and Lucien found each other. “I never really believed in all this to begin with, it crept up on me before I knew what was happening.”

 

Jean laughed lightly, “I can imagine. My bond with Lucien took a few turns to get to where we are now. I’m sure you’ll find your soulmate, Alice. These things happen for a reason, even if we don’t see it right away.”

 

“I know,” Alice smiled, her eyes warm. “I have this feeling, it’s always been there, telling me that when the time is right it’ll happen, and I’m a patient woman.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matthew's baaaaaaack (yaaaay!) Enjoy! Comments are appreciated!

He was back home. The hearings in Melbourne had gone as expected and for awhile Matthew feared for his job and purpose until Charlie brought him the evidence he needed to delay his retirement from the police force. His return to Ballarat came with a demotion, but Matthew didn’t care.

 

He was home.

 

It chafed to take orders from the man he was trying to catch in a slip up, but Matthew swallowed his pride and ducked his head to do his job. Munro had him running around doing so many menial and mundane tasks that it was close to two weeks before Matthew got a chance to go down to the morgue.

 

(It was a task from Munro that brought him down there, actually, and for once Matthew wasn’t as annoyed with the man.) 

 

He strolled down to the chilly basement of the hospital, his hands in his pockets as he went to pick up the report Munro “needed immediately”. With Charlie out handling a situation on one of the local farms with Bill Hobart, Matthew was the only one around to go to the morgue. 

 

His bruised and cut knuckles had finally healed, only a lingering tightness when the new skin pulled taut across the bones. He’d thought about his soulmate more and more during his time in Melbourne. Matthew wondered who they were, what they did, what they were like. The scars from them told him bits and pieces, like hearing snatches of a familiar song from a radio across a crowded room. Their shared bruises and pain showed him their restraint and strength. They were careful, never hurting themselves aside from the bruises on their throat weeks ago.

 

His heart still warred over the fondness he had for Alice and his curiosity at who his soulmate was, but the pull in his chest grew larger the closer he got to Ballarat. Matthew couldn’t pinpoint where exactly it pulled him to in Ballarat; he dared to hope of the implications whenever it flared into life every time he thought of Alice.

 

His feet slowed to a stop outside of the mortuary door, ajar and with fluorescent lighting pouring out into the darkened hallway. Matthew peered around the door and smiled fondly at the sight of Doctor Alice Harvey bent over a microscope with a steaming cup of tea on the counter next to her.

 

He’d missed her company, the way she felt comfortable in long silences where Lucien or others would try to fill it. He’d missed her blunt way of talking, her fascination with death. He’d missed the tiny furrow of concentration between her brows as she frowned, and he’d missed the cool touch of her fingers in his hand. He’d missed  _ her _ .

 

Matthew rapped on the frosted glass pane in the door with his knuckles, “Afternoon, Doctor.”

 

She swiveled around on her stool with a frown (almost a scowl that rivaled his own, he noted) before she realized it was him. A smile - bright and warm - spread across her face and made his heart skip a beat.

 

“Superintendent!”

 

“Chief Inspector now, actually,” Matthew walked up to her side and leaned his left elbow against the counter, facing her fully. 

 

She sat back and crossed her arms, but the smile remained. Her hair was longer than he remembered, still the same firebrand red, the curls a little wilder, and her eyes shone brightly with her smile. She seemed more at ease here in Ballarat, more sure of her place than when he’d left. She seemed at home.

 

That thought made him smile again.

 

“How can I help you,  _ Chief Inspector _ Lawson?” Alice asked him, her tone teasing.

 

“Superintendent Munro sent me down for your report,  _ Doctor  _ Harvey.”

 

At Munro’s name, Alice rolled her eyes with a sigh of thinly-veiled disgust and a low chuckle escaped Matthew’s mouth. Her reaction summed up his feelings on the man perfectly.

 

“Honestly,” Alice groused, a crease appearing between her eyebrows as she glared down at her microscope. “He has no appreciation for the process of science. The report’s not finished, not until the samples come back from the lab and that’s not for a few hours at least.”

 

“He won’t like to hear that.”

 

“Well he can shove it up his arse for all I care.”

 

“ _ Alice _ !” 

 

Her high pitched peals of laughter echoed off the tiled walls after one look at his shocked face. Alice threw her head back as she laughed, clutching her stomach and nearly falling off her stool in the process. 

 

She was beautiful. A portrait of rosy cheeks with a wide smile and the tiniest gap in her front teeth, riotous curls fighting against the pins as she laughed, fully and deeply. He couldn’t help but join in, painting himself into the picture of her joy. For the life of him, Matthew couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed like this, a full-belly aching laugh that left him with tears in his eyes, an ache in his cheeks, and light in his heart.

 

* * *

 

It felt good to see him again, Alice realized in the middle of her giggle fit with Matthew. She’d missed him, missed his quiet calm, his safe harbor in the storm of her life. Her heart still lurched whenever she thought of her fondness for him and not her soulmate (she still dared to hope that he might be it), but Alice was happy to have him back. His face carried a few more wrinkles, deeper around his mouth, and his light brown hair sprinkled with more silver hairs than had been there months before, but his eyes were still that ethereal, piercing blue. Matthew looked tired, a bit run through the ringer, but he looked good.

 

Their laughter died away and the boyish grin remained on Matthew’s face long after they settled into a warm silence. He straightened and shuffled closer to her at the counter. She watched curiously as he offered his right hand. Alice shyly took it with her left hand and a small smile. 

 

He remembered to ask.

 

His fingers closed around hers and her stomach flipped. She ducked her head to hide the heat rising to her cheeks, but at the gentle bump of his shoulder against hers, she smiled up at him.

 

“You alright, Alice?”

 

Alice squeezed his hand, “I’m better now.”

 

Matthew’s thumb brushed across her knuckles, sending shivers down Alice’s spine. “Were things that rough here?”

 

She nodded. She wanted to tell him all that happened, but the words caught in her throat. Alice swallowed and tried again, but still nothing came out.

 

He squeezed her hand, a fond smile on his face as he gave her the tiniest nod. Matthew understood.

 

* * *

 

Matthew didn’t push. The hesitation was palpable in Alice’s face. She wanted to tell him something, to answer his question in more detail, but she wasn’t ready yet. She didn’t push when he had trouble vocalizing his problems and so neither would he.

 

“Lucien’s antics probably didn’t help matters either.”

 

Alice laughed lightly, “No, they certainly did not.”

 

“I seem to remember asking you to keep an eye on him, Doctor Harvey,” he teased.

 

“I seem to recall telling you that he has a mind of his own, Inspector Lawson,” she shot back, her fingers relaxing in his during their banter.

 

“Mm, that’s true, you did say that,” Matthew looked down at the stainless steel counter in front of him, remembering their soft conversation in her office months before. It felt like years ago.

 

She mimicked his earlier bump of the shoulder, getting him to look at her. “Are  _ you _ alright, Matthew?”

 

“I will be.”

 

“I’m here… if you need someone to talk to.”

 

“I… thank you, Alice. The same applies to you at any time.”

 

She smiled at him, “And you can tell your insufferable boss that the report will be on his desk by tomorrow at the earliest. I do have other work to do besides his bidding at all hours of the day.”

 

Matthew chuckled, “I’ll leave that last bit out, hm?”

 

“Do as you like, I don’t really care about his opinion of me at this point.”

 

He bumped her shoulder again, “It’s good to see you, Alice.”

 

“You too, Matthew,” her smile brightened and Matthew simply looked at her for a moment. He lifted her hand to his mouth on impulse and pressed a breath of a kiss to her knuckles, the dark pink blush of her cheeks mirroring the heat in his. The feeling in his chest flared up again; something passed between them, a spark that hadn’t been there before he left, but Matthew was interested in exploring it. Judging by the light in her eyes, Alice was too.

 

* * *

 

Visits with Jean almost weekly had sort of just happened. Mrs. Blake had stopped by the following week after the Orton case to check up on her again and to bring more shortbread biscuits ( _ “How are these so good?” “I put in a bit of vanilla.” _ ) that were rapidly becoming Alice’s favorite dessert. Alice invited her in for tea and they passed the afternoon in conversation. Both enjoyed it and picked up where they left off the following week. The visits hadn’t been planned, but almost like clockwork, Jean would show up on Alice’s doorstep (or Alice on Jean’s) with a batch of biscuits and a topic ready to discuss.

 

They discussed all sorts of things: the marking, Jean’s boys and little Amelia Jean, Alice’s schooling in Melbourne and her favorite professor, gardening, anatomy, and cooking.

 

The last topic led them to Alice’s current visit in the Blake household. It wasn’t that Alice didn’t know how to cook, she just wasn’t the best at it.

 

Jean, blessed Jean, had very kindly offered to teach her a few more dishes outside of her simple repertoire and Alice never could turn down an opportunity for learning. So, here in Jean’s kitchen, in one of Jean’s spare aprons, Alice prepared a pie under Jean’s gentle - but watchful - gaze. Cutting the ingredients came easy, it wasn’t all that different to an autopsy.

 

_ “If pathology doesn’t work out, you’re a first rate sous chef,” Jean remarked with a smile and Alice laughed. _

 

_ “I’ll stick to the dead all the same.” _

 

Her fingers were clumsy outside of the slicing and dicing, but Jean helped with gentle encouragements and cheering her on, bumping her shoulder with her own as Alice’s pie filling thickened on the stove. The pie looked a little wonky in the end, the bottom was soggy, and the filling a little bland, but Alice had to beam with pride as Jean served it for just the two of them with a flourish alongside their tea.

 

“We can work on it, all it takes is practice and a little bit of chemistry,” Jean smiled over the rim of her cup.

 

Alice shrugged, “We’ll see.”

 

“If you don’t mind me asking, Alice… where  _ did _ you learn to cook what you know?”

 

She looked down into her teacup with a sigh. Jean was only curious; she didn’t mean anything by her question. Alice wasn’t sure what Lucien had told his wife about her, and really she hadn’t told Lucien much of anything beyond what he put together from the pieces she dropped in their morgue conversations and during the Orton case. Biting down on her inner cheek hard enough to sting, Alice nodded to herself. Jean had been kind enough to indulge in Alice’s own curiosity over their weekly visits, so maybe it was Alice’s turn to open up just a little.

 

“I… mostly taught myself. My… my mother wasn’t always  _ there _ mentally and I had a sister to take care of in those days. I could do the basics, in the very least not let anything burn because my father hated when things burned. The rest… I learned while at school or from magazines. I’d follow the recipes to the letter and it still wouldn’t turn out right, but I do alright for myself.”

 

Jean’s hand reached out across the table slowly and Alice took it. She liked holding hands with someone; Alice discovered this tidbit about herself after Matthew’s visits and seeing Jean more and more. Jean was a very tactile affectionate person, much like Lucien, but scaled down compared to his boisterousness. Jean’s affection stemmed from her maternal instincts, something Alice had not experienced much of growing up.

 

A small part of her looked forward to the day when she felt comfortable enough to accept all of the motherly acts of affection from Jean. On some days, it blocked out the other part of her that warned not to get too close with people who could leave at any minute.

 

“Are you excited to go see your son, Jean?”

 

Her friend’s face lit up with a grin, “I am. It’ll be nice to see Ruby again too, I haven’t seen her since my wedding, and now there’s little Amelia Jean.”

 

“You must be proud.”

 

“I am. Lucien’s looking forward to seeing them all again. He’s excited to be a grandfather.”

 

At Lucien’s name, Alice chewed on her inner cheek, “Has he…?”

 

“Talked about wanting to exhume his mother?” Jean finished for her with a sigh. “A little, I know both Matthew and I have tried broaching the subject with him, but he’s being…”

 

“Cagey?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“He keeps asking about the soil tests every day we see each other, Jean. I don’t know if he’ll like the results when they come back.”

 

Jean sighed, her hand tightening around Alice’s as she rested her chin in the other. “Oh, Lucien…”

 

“I don’t think I ever got the full story about her. He showed me a painting of hers once; I know he holds her in very high regard.”

 

Jean smiled, “That sounds like Lucien. His mother, Genevieve, died when he was around ten years old. She was a force of life from Dr. Blake’s stories, very much like Lucien, the kind of person who draws others in by their mere presence. From what his father told me, her death was sudden and an accident no one could prevent.”

 

“But Lucien thinks otherwise?”

 

“I’m afraid so, I don’t think he’ll rest until he knows.”

 

Alice squeezed Jean’s hand and they shared a smile, “I can let you know when the results come in so you know as well.”

 

“Thank you, Alice. I have dinner to prepare, would you like to help?”

 

“If you want something burnt, sure.”

 

Jean laughed and pulled Alice up from the table, “You can slice the vegetables and pour us some wine, I’ll cook the meat, how about that?”

 

“Deal.”

 

* * *

 

By the time Lucien and Matthew arrived at the Blake house with Charlie, the rich, hearty scent of dinner wafted out of the kitchen, followed by laughter as soon as they crossed the threshold.

 

“Jean and Mattie must be having fun.”

 

“Sounds like it.”

 

Another burst of laughter erupted as they entered and instead of Mattie and Jean like they expected, Alice and Jean laughed as they finished the final preparations on dinner. Lucien spied two almost empty glasses of wine and the bottle on the counter, coupled with the rosy cheeks on the two women in front him, they were likely a bit tipsy.

 

“I see you ladies started without us,” Lucien smiled.

 

“You know where your drink cart is, Lucien, don’t give me that,” Jean wagged a finger at her husband as she took one last drink from her glass. “Mattie’s out with friends and dinner’s just about done, could one of you set the table?”

 

Between Charlie and Matthew, the table was set in no time, Lucien coming in behind with drinks for all, while Jean and Alice put their labor on the table. Conversation flowed easily around the table, Lucien discussing the latest case with all of them, then reminiscing on the trouble Lucien usually got into (and pulling Matthew along with him). Laughter was frequent at the dinner table that night and Jean couldn’t remember seeing a time where Alice enjoyed herself as much as she did that night. 

 

It could be the wine that flowed through their veins or the company, but Jean watched fondly as Alice laughed at the tales of Lucien’s antics. She noted the shared glances between Matthew and Alice as the night went on and the plates cleared. There was something there, between them, and Jean wondered if the people Matthew and Alice were searching for were right there in front of them.

 

Matthew’s smiles were easy (usually directed at Alice), his eyes soft as he watched her laugh and banter with Lucien. Alice reached out to touch him to get his attention (which she rarely did even with Lucien) or simply met his gaze with a knowing glance as their friend tried to justify his bizarre - often disruptive - ways of obtaining the truth. After dinner, and a nightcap, Jean and Lucien sent Matthew and Alice off with a wave.

 

“There’s something there, don’t you think?” Her husband remarked as they watched Matthew open the car door for Alice.

 

“I do,” Jean leaned back into his embrace, smiling when he wrapped his arms more fully around her. “We’ll just have to wait and see what happens.”

 

“Yes, we shall.”

 

* * *

 

God, he felt like punching something. 

 

“ _ You are now surplus to requirements _ .”

 

He  _ really _ felt like punching something.

 

Matthew stalked down the hospital hallway towards the morgue, his fists clenched tight in his trouser pockets, his jaw clenched even tighter. Munro was forcing him into early retirement and Matthew chewed on his inner cheek so hard, he tasted iron before even leaving the police station a few minutes before. It stung with each step and for once, Matthew relished in the pain; it kept him steady even as he wanted to choke the smug look off of Munro’s face.

 

It wasn’t fair. He’d only just come back to Ballarat, only just gotten his feet back underneath him and his purpose back. He’d only just begun to explore whatever was brewing between him and Alice. It wasn’t fair that the universe now decided to take it all back from him. He wasn’t alone; Lucien had been sacked as the police surgeon, threatened with criminal charges, and on top of that, he was reconciling with the fact his own mother had been murdered forty years before.

 

He couldn’t bother Lucien, or Jean as she prepared for a trip to see her granddaughter in Adelaide. So, Matthew headed to the only other place he knew he’d be welcome besides the Blake residence. Knocking sharply on the frosted glass pane, Matthew barely waited for Alice’s call to enter the morgue.

 

“Matthew?” She stood at the stainless steel table, white coat on even as she cleaned equipment. Even in his ire, his heart thumped harder in his chest at the sight of her.

 

“I just-” Matthew cut himself of with an impatient sigh and started pacing the length of the room. 

 

“Should I ask?”

 

“Munro,” he spat out, still pacing.

 

* * *

 

Alice raised her eyebrows at his tone, but nodded all the same. She continued her work on cleaning the equipment, stopping only when Matthew paused in his pacing. He hesitated more than once, trying to find the words to vocalize his anger at Munro, but every time he shook his head and continued pacing. 

 

Finally, after five minutes of silence and pacing, Alice put down a thoroughly cleaned pair of forceps. “Matthew, how would you like it if I came to your police station and paced while you were in the middle of an interrogation?”

 

Her remark still didn't stop him. She rounded the table and put a hand on his arm as he passed her, “Matthew!”

 

He whirled around and his hands grasped her hips, the momentum of his pacing kept going and Alice felt the cold metal of the autopsy table press up against her vertebrae. Her fingers dug into the dark blue wool of his uniformed shoulders - his rank pins cold against her hands - as she felt the heat of his palms seep through her clothes. The intensity in his brilliant blue eyes had Alice struggling to remember how to breathe, her heart thudding rapidly against her ribcage. His hands slid up her torso, settling on the dip of her waist, leaving a burning trail on her skin behind them.

 

He shuffled closer, his ire with Munro forgotten as he cupped one of her cheeks - one of her own hands mirroring Matthew - and leaned in close enough for Alice to feel his steady breaths against her face. Heat flooded her body as he absentmindedly brushed his thumb across her cheekbone, one, two, three times. His piercing eyes searched hers and she knew what she wanted. She wanted this, she wanted him, soulmate be damned at this moment. The thrumming in her ribcage reverberated throughout her body, not all of it her heartbeat.

 

Standing here, in his arms, pressed up against the table of her workplace, Alice had never felt more at home. 

 

‘ _ Is this what I’ve been waiting for? _ ’

 

She shifted, her nose pressing into the skin of his jaw as his hand slid into her hair, cupping the base of her skull. 

 

His lips brushed against her cheek and sent shivers down her spine. “Alice…”

 

Matthew drew back, his other hand coming up to cradle her face as she grasped his wrists with shaking fingers. His eyes dropped to her lips and her stomach flipped as he inched closer. Her eyes closed in anticipation as she leaned further into him, her rapid heartbeat filling her ears, matching the thrumming pulse of his wrists beneath her fingers.

 

The sharp, shrill ring of the telephone startled them apart and they looked at each other like a deer in headlights. The morgue telephone rang again and Matthew stepped back to allow Alice to pass him, two bright spots of red on his cheeks. Alice bit back a smile, her own cheeks and chest burning, as she quickly answered the telephone.

 

It was Lucien, wanting to speak to Matthew. How in the world he knew the inspector would be there was a mystery to Alice. Still, she put her hand over the receiver and turned to Matthew, who watched her expectantly.

 

“It’s for you.”

 

Matthew cleared his throat and walked over. He smiled at her as he reached for the phone, “Thank you, sweetheart.”

 

Alice ducked her head to hide her smile, her cheeks growing even warmer than she thought possible, as Matthew talked to Lucien on the phone. She’d never been called that before. She’d been called brilliant, strange, confounding even, but never  _ sweetheart _ . It frightened and thrilled her at the same time with how much it felt natural for Matthew to call her that.

 

The conversation didn’t last long, but Alice could tell Lucien was up to his usual outlandish ideas. She leaned against the counter next to the phone while Matthew talked, her arms crossed. Matthew kept sneaking looks at her even as he and Lucien planned something, his eyes sweeping over her in an admiring gaze.

 

She wasn’t sure if humans could blush as much as she was right now, but the attention felt nice.

 

He finally hung up with a sigh, one of his hands coming up to pinch at the bridge of his nose.

 

“Lucien find something?” Alice asked, her voice soft.

 

“He did. He knows who killed Franklin and his mother, Doug Ashby confirmed it. He wants to confront Clement.”

 

Alice reached out to him, her hand tangling with his, “What are you going to do?”

 

“Give him back up,” Matthew sighed. “He mentioned that he has the proof we need to get Munro out of here.”

 

“That’s good, isn’t it?”

 

He nodded, “It is.”

 

She squeezed his hand and he smiled. Alice rubbed her thumb across his knuckles, mimicking his familiar motion, and faltered when she felt the crosshatching patchwork of thin, raised scars across the rough skin. 

 

They eerily matched her own.

 

“Alice… about before-”

 

Alice shunted aside her racing thoughts at this new discovery, focusing on Matthew. “We can talk about it later, if you’d like, Matthew. You’ll need all of your focus to help Lucien out with this.”

 

His other hand came up and barely brushed her cheek, she smiled and leaned into it, the old familiar feeling in her chest blooming to life after so long. Matthew stepped closer and pressed a kiss to her forehead, “Later, hm?”

 

“We’ve got time,” Alice brushed the back of her fingers along his jaw before curling her hand around the back of his neck to hide the shakiness of her fingers. ‘ _ Could it be? _ ’

 

She felt Matthew press another kiss to her forehead and then the side of her head as he pulled her into his arms, oblivious to the rising tide of emotion clamoring in Alice’s mind.

 

“That we do, sweetheart, that we do.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tw: blood (description of injuries) in this chapter, set in 4.01

Time was not on their side.

 

Jean and Lucien left for Adelaide after Clement was locked up for murder charges against Lucien’s mother and Doug Ashby. (Alice had personally seen to that autopsy, barring Lucien from the morgue. No one should have to cut open someone they cared about.)

 

With the Blakes gone, everywhere felt quieter - muted - like her head was submerged in the ocean. Running the police station kept Matthew busy and away from the morgue. The dead and her own doubts kept Alice from seeking out his company. When she wasn’t performing autopsies or running tests, report writing and paperwork kept her in the morgue and her office from sun up to sun down.

 

Alice distanced herself from Matthew in this time, though it hurt to do it so soon after their moment in the morgue. She’d only felt the scars on his hand briefly, so her suspicions of their significance were paper-thin at best, but she needed to sort out the racing thoughts in her head before she saw him again. Her hopes of Matthew being her soulmate had been a recent development, growing more since he’d returned from Melbourne.

 

Hopes and actuality were two different things.

 

As such, Alice hadn’t seen Matthew in well over a week by the time Lucien returned from Adelaide. Lucien didn’t seem himself - preoccupied - and Alice wondered what exactly happened in Adelaide. Still, it was good to have him back, the quiet lessened, work became less tedious, and the busy moments felt less like busy work and more productive.

 

She found herself thinking back to the moment with Matthew - that brief suspension of time where her world zeroed in to just them before the telephone rang - at odd moments throughout the day. If Lucien were his usual self he probably would have commented on her pensive look and the flushed cheeks, but he flitted in and out of the morgue with a dazed attitude.

 

The whirlwind of Lucien Blake left for the final time that morning, leaving Alice with a little peace and quiet. She’d missed him certainly, but some tasks, like cleaning equipment, were best done alone and in silence.

 

‘ _Well, relative silence_ ,’ Alice smiled as she caught herself humming lightly as she cleaned the beakers, test tubes, and glass sample jars they used in their autopsies.

 

As she carried the tray full from the sink to the empty table in the middle of the room, pain blossomed in her right hip, ricocheting up her side to her shoulder. Alice dropped the tray in shock, barely acknowledging the glass shattering as she gasped. She only had a moment to process it all before a deeper, white-hot pain pierced her right leg and it gave out beneath her.

 

Glass sliced her hands, elbows, and knees, but Alice barely felt it above the deep, twisting, sharp throb lancing through her body from her leg. She couldn’t even breathe, couldn’t shout out, couldn’t hear anything through the blood rushing in her ears. Something was _wrong_. Something terribly wrong was happening to her soulmate at this very moment.

 

With shaking, bloodied hands and stuttered, gasping breaths, Alice pushed herself up off the floor and sat against the cabinets in autopsy. Through the tears and pain, she saw the bright red mark appear a few inches above her right knee and wrap around her inner thigh, it throbbed, the pain reaching deep down to her femur bone and Alice knew it was broken, the femoral artery likely lacerated. She didn’t know how much time passed between the initial pain and the next, her heart going out to her soulmate as the pain waxed and waned in waves.

 

Another sharp pain, this one much worse than the initial break lanced through her leg and Alice cried out in shock. Vaguely, her medical knowledge supplied her with the possibility of the bone break being reset. Alice didn’t care about the medical knowledge, it fucking hurt. The reset pain repeated and Alice screamed as she sobbed, instinctively curling inward to try and alleviate the fire in her leg.

 

‘ _Let it end, let it end!_ ’ she begged to anyone who would hear her as hot tears streamed down her face. ‘ _Make it stop hurting him!_ ’

 

The sharpness abruptly ended, but the pulsing throb of constant pain continued as Alice cried on the floor of the morgue. As the pain of her soulmate slowly faded - either he was unconscious or given medication - the pain of her own stinging cuts to her hands, arms, and knees resurfaced with a vengeance. Alice let out a shaky breath, repeating it as she calmed the hammering of her heart in her ribcage, before she gingerly stood up from the floor.

 

It was difficult, standing without jarring the glass in her palms, elbows, or knees, but she managed to stand upright and leaned against the cabinets until her quivering legs stopped shaking long enough for her to walk over and grab a towel.

 

One thought pulsed through her mind as she held the towel between her hands (her blood soon turned the white material red). Her soulmate was hurt, badly, and she didn’t know who he was. Slowly, Alice walked from the morgue and up into the hospital proper. She knew she had to get her hands looked at, but a part of her knew also that her heart was searching for its match.

 

Her soulmate was hurt, badly, and she didn’t know who he was. But, the pain had stopped, the numbness that filled her briefly before the pain stopped was all too familiar to her as a doctor. Anaesthetic. He was in a hospital and judging by the thrumming in her ribcage - that familiar old friend of a feeling that drew her to Ballarat in the first place - her soulmate was in this hospital.

 

“Alice!” Mattie’s face, pale and drawn with worry, filled her vision. “Alice, your hands!”

 

“I… there was an accident in the morgue,” Alice cleared her throat, her voice hoarse, and pushed back the thoughts in her head - the towel in her hands worryingly red.

 

“Let me see to that, and your arms and knees.”

 

The district nurse led her over to an open bed and eased her down carefully. Alice felt as though she were in a fog, her head swimming with her pain and worry over her soulmate. She remembered her suspicions on _who_ her soulmate was and her stomach lurched; as much as she wanted Matthew to be the one she searched for, she hadn’t wanted this.

 

‘ _If only Jean were here, I could ask her_.’

 

Mattie’s hands were gentle as she slowly removed all the glass from Alice’s palms, arms, and knees. Alice watched silently as the younger woman bandaged her up in a motion brought on by repetitive practice. The cuts were shallow, but they’d scar. Alice didn’t mind, what were more scars to those that already adorned her body?

 

(If Mattie noticed the bright red gash of a mark above and around her knee - and the newly appeared suture puncture marks around the scar - she didn’t say anything to Alice about it)

 

“Thank you, Mattie,” Alice told her softly.

 

Mattie smiled back at her, an emotion that wasn’t pity, but empathy, shining in her eyes. “Happy to help. Anything else I can do for you? Get you another change of clothes perhaps, or a cup of tea?”

 

Alice looked down at herself after Mattie’s remark and frowned at the bloodstains on her clothes. “I… I didn’t realize I bled that much. I have a change of clothes in my office, it’s no matter.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

She nodded, “Do you know where Lucien is?”

 

“He’s in Superintendent Lawson’s room.”

 

Alice felt the blood drain out of her face, “ _Matthew’s room_?” ‘ _No, please, no._ ’

 

Mattie nodded, her eyes turning sad, “He… he was in an accident at the garage, a suspect ran him down with a car. He has a broken femur.”

 

“Is... he alright?”

 

“Lucien reset the leg and they managed to stop the bleeding from his lacerated femoral artery, but we’re not sure how the leg will heal just yet.”

 

Matthew. Of _course_ it was Matthew. Alice felt her heart rate speed up, the thrumming in her ribcage increasing as this new revelation reinvigorating her, confirming her suspicions and hopes at the same time that she felt the bottom of her stomach drop out at the extent of Matthew’s injuries. It lifted the fog in her mind, and she pushed herself up off the bed. “I have to see him.”

 

“Alice?”

 

She bit down on her lower lip, “I meant Lucien, I have some test results he’ll want to hear about.”

 

The test results were a blatant lie; Alice just needed an excuse to see Matthew.

 

“You’re sure?”

 

“Yes, I am. Thank you again, Mattie,” she lifted her bandaged hands with a slight smile and set off down the hall with a purpose. The toxicologist’s assistant passed her in the hallway - ironically enough handing her the results for Errol Moore. Alice nodded her thanks, looking over the results and absentmindedly put together the outcome of them before she continued on her search.

 

She ignored the looks from the assistant and others in the hospital, knowing she must look a fright with her pale face, red-rimmed eyes (likely trails of her mascara running down her cheeks - that thought had her scrubbing at her cheeks as she walked through the halls), and blood stained clothes. Alice searched the surgical recovery rooms for Lucien’s familiar blond head. With each step, her heart beat faster, one name circling around her head.

 

_Matthew._

 

Alice slowed as she approached the last recovery room, spotting the form of Matthew through the window. As quietly as she could, Alice pushed the door open, her eyes taking in the sleeping superintendent, his face almost the same shade of the crisp, white sheets that surrounded him. She swallowed her tears as they crept into the corners of her eyes. Here he was, here he had been all along, and she almost lost him to a man in a car.

 

“Ah, Alice,” Lucien’s voice, soft and rough with sleep, beckoned her into the room.

 

“I, uh, got the toxicology results back for the man under the car,” she briefly reached out and touched Lucien’s shoulder, grounding herself as much as she was comforting him. She handed him the folder. “There’s nothing unusual in the bloodstream.”

 

“What?” Matthew’s voice, groggy and gruff, startled the two of them. Alice couldn’t stop the faint sigh of relief that escaped her at the sight of his blue eyes, clouded as they were by his pain medication.

 

She stepped closer to the foot of his bed, wanting more than anything to round it and take his hand in hers, but Lucien’s presence prevented that wish from happening.

 

“Errol Moore’s toxicology results,” Alice cleared her throat, willing the tears back again as she talked to Matthew. “They’re completely clean.”

 

It was the first time she’d seen him in over a week, the first time since their moment in the morgue, the first time since she’d felt the scars on his knuckles and hoped he was hers, and now… the first time since she confirmed he was her soulmate.

 

A single tear escaped her control as she met his gaze, his eyes still piercing through the residual anaesthetic.

 

“How are you, Matthew?”

 

“Terrible,” he drawled.

 

Even in immense pain, Matthew knew how to make her laugh. Alice ducked her head and swiped quickly at her eyes, so relieved that he was alive enough to joke at all.

 

“Alice, what happened to your hands?” The weight of Lucien’s hand on her shoulder made her flinch and look up. Her friend’s eyes were apologetic for startling her, and he gently cradled one of her bandaged hands in his, concern etched into every crevice of his face. The concern deepened as he took in the other bandages, smeared makeup, and the blood on her clothes.

 

“There was an accident down in the morgue. It was clumsy of me, really. I’m fine, Lucien.”

 

“You’re sure?” He squeezed her shoulder and she nodded. “Let me know if they start hurting more.”

 

“I will.” She turned back to Matthew with a smile. Her heart ached to stay beside him, to take his hand and never let go. Lucien’s presence, though comforting, felt intrusive and held Alice back from acting on her urges towards Matthew. A part of her - the walls of her heart, her protection for years - pulled back when those urges crossed her mind. Matthew was her soulmate, yes, but what did that entail? Was she ready to bear it all to him? They had a kinship, one formed out of the knowledge neither had entirely innocent childhoods, but they never talked about them. Was Alice ready to share that with Matthew? Was _he_ ready to share with her?

 

She needed to think more on this, needed to settle the ongoing fight between her caution and her heart. Alice reached down and rested her hand on Matthew’s good shin with the briefest of touches, her fingers shaking. “I’ll leave you to Lucien, Matthew. Get some rest.”

 

“You too, sweetheart,” he slurred.

 

Alice’s cheeks flooded with heat even as she smiled. The drugs loosened any control Matthew had over what he said, but a thrill shot through her all the same at the term of endearment. She couldn’t even look at Lucien, but she could feel his eyes burning a hole into her head as she ducked out of the hospital room.

 

“Alice?”

 

“I’ll see you later, Lucien.” Narrowly avoiding an interrogation at the hand of her closest friend, Alice walked quickly away from Matthew’s room and to her office to change. She’d come back long after everyone left and after she’d had time to process to see her soulmate, but right now there was work to be done.

 

* * *

 

Lucien felt better than he had in days. Jean was _home_. The timing was all terrible; Matthew’s accident, Charlie injured, and Alice’s accident in the morgue (plus that really interesting interaction between her and Matthew earlier), but Jean was here and by his side.

 

They’d spent so long separated as two parts of a whole, that Lucien never felt right without her. He led her from Matthew’s room, the two of them discussing their mutual friend, when Alice approached with another folder.

 

“Lucien!” She smiled when she reached him, her face still pale and her eyes still red-rimmed, but she’d changed out of her blood stained clothes and fixed her make-up. “Jean.”

 

“Hello,” Jean smiled at the pathologist.

 

“Alice, feeling better?” He asked, rubbing Jean’s upper arm when she shot him a curious look.

 

His friend nodded, “I am. I also thought you should see these.” She held up the folder and opened up to pictures of Errol Moore’s back. “Most of the skin on Moore’s back was scraped away post-mortem, but these are from a patch of skin remaining on his shoulder.” Alice pointed to the curious bruising on their victim’s back in the picture. “I think it’s the imprint of the ground beneath the body. Paving of some kind?”

 

“Well done, Alice,” Lucien squeezed her shoulder with a smile.

 

She returned it and her attention turned to Jean, “If you have a minute, Jean… could we talk?”

 

Jean nodded and turned to him, “Lucien, could you keep watch? Make sure no one will bother us?”

 

“I certainly will. No one will get pass me, I promise.” He smiled.

 

“Good, let’s go over here, Alice.” Jean led Alice into an empty exam room and Lucien kept watch at the door. He knew he shouldn’t listen in on their conversation, especially to respect Alice’s privacy, but he still couldn’t help but overhear the two of them.

 

“What did you want to talk about, Alice?” Jean’s tone of voice was soft, comforting; he could imagine the patient, but expectant look on his wife’s face.

 

Fabric rustled behind him, Lucien pictured Alice shifting from foot to foot. “How… how did you know Lucien was the one?”

 

Of all the questions Lucien thought Alice would ask, it certainly wasn’t that one.

 

“It’s complicated… We were drawn to each other for weeks beforehand, but I didn’t actually know it was Lucien until he almost died. I felt his pain and then saw the man choking Lucien in his office at home.”

 

Lucien shifted in the doorway, looking to all of the world to be fully engrossed in the pictures. He remembered the night that Jean found out he was her soulmate all too easily.

 

“Did something happen, Alice?” Jean’s voice grew even softer.

 

Alice sniffled and then let out a sharp pant as though she was trying not to cry. Heels clipped across the floor and fabric rustled again. Lucien dared a glance over his shoulder and his heart ached at the sight of Alice bending slightly to fit in Jean’s embrace. She cried as quietly as she could, Jean’s hands smoothing up and down her back as Alice shook with her sobs. After a few minutes, Alice drew back with a sigh, wiping at her cheeks with shaky, bandaged hands. She avoided Jean’s eyes, but didn’t pull away when Jean grasped one of Alice’s hands in both of her own.

 

“What happened, Alice?” Jean asked when Alice calmed down. She reached up and gently wiped away a falling tear with a finger.

 

Alice let out a shaky breath, looking at the floor as she spoke, “I think I know who it is.”

 

“Your soulmate?”

 

Alice nodded, “I think it’s Matthew.”

 

Jean looked down at Alice’s leg at the same time Lucien did, both instantly seeing the red scar around Alice’s right knee, visible even around the bandages, peeking out from beneath her skirt hem. Lucien was all too familiar with it as he’d sewn up the original on Matthew’s leg. His eyes traveled to the bandages on Alice’s knees, arms, and hands, and they answered his earlier question of the small, narrow scars that had appeared on Matthew’s knees shortly before his surgery.

 

“You…?”

 

“I felt it, Jean. _I felt it_.” Alice grasped Jean’s hands fiercely, almost fervently.

 

“Oh, Alice…” His wife pulled a hand free and reached up to tuck a stray curl behind Alice’s ear. “Does he know?”

 

His friend shook her head, her eyes watery as she looked at Jean. “There… wasn’t really time earlier. And-” Alice cut herself off with a sigh.

 

“What?”

 

Alice shifted from foot to foot as her gaze dropped to the floor again. “What if…” her voice, usually so sure and confident, could barely be heard above the hustle and bustle of the hospital behind Lucien. “What if he doesn’t want me, Jean?”

 

Jean pressed a hand to Alice’s cheek gently, her thumb brushing across the sharp cheekbone in a gesture of comfort born of years of motherhood. “Alice, I’ve seen the way he looks at you, the way he talks to you. He wants you, I’m sure of it.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Really,” his wife nodded. “You should talk to Matthew though, he needs to know.”

 

“I will.”

 

“Will you be alright in the meantime?”

 

Alice nodded, “I will.”

 

“Don’t hesitate to stop by whenever you need it, Alice,” Lucien piped up from the doorway, smiling even as Jean sent him a chiding look for eavesdropping.

 

Alice simply smiled, “I may take you up on that, Lucien.” She turned back to Jean and after a brief moment of hesitation, leaned forward and hugged his wife.

 

Jean’s eyebrows rose in shock, but she quickly wrapped her arms around Alice’s back, squeezing slightly before Alice ended the hug.

 

Her cheeks were pink from embarrassment, but the smile still remained on Alice’s face. “I… thank you, Jean.”

 

“Any time, Alice,” Jean smiled and watched as Alice slipped out of the exam room (accepting the brief shoulder squeeze from Lucien in the doorway) and down the hall. “Seems we were right, Lucien.”

 

“They found each other at last,” he pulled his wife to him and held her close, breathing in the unique mix of floral, soap, and the lingering scent of baby from Amelia Jean. “Terrible way to find out, though.”

 

“It’ll be a long road of recovery for Matthew, but we’ll all just have to be there for him and Alice.”

 

“We will.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WE. ARE. HERE. 
> 
> please enjoy this chapter, thank you so much for your reviews and feedback! I appreciate all of them!

The sound of her heels echoed in the dimmed light of the hallway. It was late; long after visiting hours were over and most of the staff had gone home for the night. Alice approached Matthew’s room with apprehension and anticipation. On one hand she was excited to see him; on the other her doubts about Matthew even wanting her as a soulmate lingered. Wanting her was one thing - she’d seen that in his eyes - but also wanting everything else that came with the burden of being a soulmate was something else.

 

Alice shook her head, trying to shake the doubts from her mind as she pushed on the door to his room. Jean (and Lucien) said Matthew would welcome the news, but Alice needed to hear it from Matthew himself. The lights were low in his room, only a small lamp on the bedside table illuminated his sleeping form. She closed the door behind her as quietly as she could and walked over to the right side of his bed. Her eyes swept over his pale face, not as deathly pale as before, but still worrisome to Alice. She took in the dark circles under his eyes, followed the jut of his cheekbone and the permanent frown lines around his mouth.

 

Her fingers reached out before she could stop herself, trailing feather light touches along his cheek and jaw; his skin warm to the touch. He was here; Matthew was here, alive, warm, and she’d almost lost him. Tears welled in her eyes as Alice gingerly sat down on the bed, her hip brushing his leg, and took his right hand in both of hers. She sniffed, her shaking thumbs rubbing the thin, raised scars on his knuckles. The scars that had started her suspicions, that gave her hope that her soulmate and Matthew were one and the same.

 

A tear splashed onto the back of his hand and her lower lip trembled. Alice had almost lost Matthew before she could tell him how she felt. Even before she found out he was the one she’d been waiting for, Alice couldn’t deny the feelings she’d developed for the gruff police superintendent before her. She couldn’t deny the way her heart beat faster whenever she heard his drawling voice, or when he met her eyes over the autopsy table. She lived for the moments they shared in the morgue, in her office, at the Blake household. To think that had almost been taken away from her… she couldn’t even dare to imagine.

 

Alice clutched his hand in hers, her body shaking with silent sobs as more tears fell on the back of his hand. He’d wake at any moment, but once the tears started, Alice found she couldn’t stop.

 

“Don’t cry, sweetheart.”

 

Matthew’s voice, heavy with sleep, startled her. She looked up with a strangled gasp to see his eyes cracked open, blinking slowly through the medicated haze and sleep. 

 

“Matthew,” Alice sighed in relief even as her cheeks turned pink in embarrassment.

 

His free hand reached up and wiped away her tears, his fingers a little clumsy, but Alice leaned into the attention nonetheless. She held his hand to her face with one of her own, warmth spreading through her body from where his thumb brushed the skin of her cheek.  _ This _ was what she’d been waiting for, this right here. Alice couldn’t believe she hadn’t seen it - hadn’t seen how they were drawn to each other; two souls adrift at sea only to find each other in the depths of the ocean.

 

“Are your hands okay?” He asked, his right hand trailing over the bandage on her left hand and right knee. “And your knees, too?”

 

Alice nodded, her tears drying as she smiled at him. “They sting a little, but I’ll live.”

 

“What happened?”

 

“I dropped a tray of glass containers and fell on them.”

 

She could see the confusion in his eyes and ducked her head. Matthew gently curled his hand beneath her chin and tilted her head back up. “You’re the most careful person I know, Alice; you’re not one to drop a tray out of nowhere.”

 

Alice smiled, her heart warming at Matthew’s statement. She bit her bottom lip as she struggled to come up with the words to tell him. “I… um. It’s hard to explain.”

 

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

 

‘ _ Bless this man and his patience, his understanding. _ ’ Alice thought.

 

“In this case, I do, Matthew. I have to explain myself this time because… it involves you too.”

 

His thumb caressed her jaw, sending shivers down her spine, but Alice didn’t look away from Matthew’s eyes. Though a little clouded from the narcotics currently running through his veins, they never wavered from her face. They were open and waiting, understanding and kind.

 

“You know of the marking?” She asked him softly, continuing at his slow nod, “For a long time, I never believed I’d get a soulmate. I… didn’t have the greatest examples of love growing up and so for years I wanted nothing to do with the marking. It took awhile after I turned eighteen, but I did get a soulmate.”

 

* * *

 

Matthew listened closely as Alice spoke to him. The bandages on her hands rasped against his skin, her thin fingers cool to the touch as always. She looked tired, her face almost as pale as he imagined his own was at this very moment, her beautiful eyes red-rimmed ( _ had she been crying? for him? _ )

 

He gently rubbed her jaw, sighing quietly at the feel of her soft skin against the calloused pad of his thumb. Matthew’s eyes dropped from Alice’s face to his own hand cupping her chin; new marks - scars - on his palms made him pause. He looked at Alice’s still bandaged hands and then back at the bright red narrow lines on his own. Matthew drew his eyes back up to Alice’s gaze, only to find she’d stopped speaking. He caressed her knee, his subconscious act slowing when he felt the slightly raised and jagged edges of a scar above and around her bandages that matched where his leg shattered at the garage.

 

Of course…  _ of course it was Alice _ .

 

A part of him had known it, had pulled him towards her even in his doubts and warring emotions. This revelation warmed him and Matthew smiled up at her.

 

* * *

 

Alice smiled back at Matthew, feeling her cheeks grow warm as his right hand stroked her knee. Drawing both of her lips in between her teeth, Alice chewed on them as she thought over what she wanted to tell Matthew -  _ how _ she wanted to tell him. She’d seen the gears turning in his head as his eyes traveled from her face, to their hands, and his fingers lightly tracing the scar on her knee. He’d figured it out.

 

She still wanted to tell him -  _ needed _ to tell him - all of the thoughts and doubts churning in her mind.

 

“I never really sought out my soulmate. I just knew they’d find me, that we’d find each other, in time. I used to almost forget I had one until the next time I woke up with bruised knuckles. Something called me here, to Ballarat, and it almost felt like coming home. I knew I belonged here, not just that my soulmate was here.”

 

She paused and looked down at his right hand, both of her hands reaching down to grasp it, her thumbs tracing the rough skin of his knuckles. His left hand dropped from her face to rest across his stomach.

 

“Then… I met you, Matthew. I met you and started to dream that maybe you could be what I was waiting for, that maybe the universe was kind enough to send you my way. I started looking forward to seeing you, to talking to you. I wanted my soulmate to be you, but I had no way of knowing if you were or that you felt the same way… at least until that moment in the morgue.”

 

She caught Matthew’s grin out of the corner of her eye and Alice felt her cheeks grow hot at the memory of being pressed between the cool autopsy table and the warmth of Matthew’s chest a couple of weeks ago. She ran her fingers over the scars on his knuckles again - nonsensical in their movements.

 

“I hadn’t felt as comfortable before as I did in your arms that day, oddly enough. That was also the day I first got my suspicions that… you were mine.”

 

Matthew tightened his hand around her fingers as he asked quietly, “What made you suspect?” 

 

Alice smiled and continued to stroke his hand, tracing idle designs on the back of it, “These scars here.”

 

“My knuckles?”

 

She nodded, “While you were gone in Melbourne, there was a situation with a suspect at the Colonist’s Club and I got caught in the middle. I woke up after he let me go from a chokehold to see scars like these on my hand.” Alice leaned down and pressed a faint kiss to his scarred knuckles, her hands tightening around his fingers. 

 

(Matthew had never seen her this affectionate)

 

“These sparked my suspicions, and I wanted so badly to tell you, to reach out to you.”

 

“But?”

 

“But I wasn’t sure you wanted me as a soulmate… I still don’t,” she squeezed his hand and he brought them up to rest on his right thigh. “Then your accident happened.”

 

Alice drew in a shaky breath as tears sprang to her eyes again. The pain from Matthew’s accident still achingly fresh in her mind. Matthew took her right hand and pressed it against his chest, right above his heart. She controlled her breathing, grounding herself in Matthew’s steady heartbeat. 

 

He was alive, he was here, he was  _ hers _ .

 

“I felt it, Matthew. I felt all of it and I was terrified of losing you before I could tell you how I feel. All I could think of was telling you, even with my doubts that you would want a soulmate like me. I had to tell you.”

 

* * *

 

Matthew felt like he could walk on air. Maybe the drugs in his system had some influence on that, but Matthew could hardly believe that Alice was sitting here in front of him, confessing that she was his soulmate. If he didn’t have her hands in his, one flush up against his heart, Matthew was half convinced he was dreaming all of this conversation.

 

He drew one of her hands up to his mouth and pressed a kiss to the back of her fingers. “Oh, sweetheart, I’ve waited for you for so long.”

 

The radiant smile, shining through the tears, made it all worth it.

 

“Really?”

 

He nodded, “I hoped it was you. God, I hoped so much that it was you, Alice.”

 

The tears continued to streak down her face and Alice laughed, almost giddy with happiness as she leaned forward to cradle his face in her hands. He smoothed his own up and down her upper arms and joined in her laughter; his hands curled around her shoulders, trailing down her back, and settled on her waist. This is what it was like to feel happy, to know where he belonged.

 

Her thumbs stroked the sharp jut of his cheekbones, her tears drying as she slowly drank in every detail of his face. He watched Alice silently as her eyes trailed over him, relief, happiness, and lingering shock evident in the blue-grey irises.

 

“Why did it take us until now?” Matthew asked, his voice slurred by sleep and the pain medication. “Why did we not see it sooner?”

 

“I don’t know,” Alice shrugged. “Granted, neither of us went out of our way to get hurt.”

 

He chuckled, “You almost slipped under my radar, until I noticed the callouses that weren’t mine.”

 

She smiled, “Honestly?”

 

“Yeah,” Matthew smiled back.

 

“To be fair, I thought a lot of my scars from you in the beginning were from my cat and I’d forgotten about the scratches.”

 

Leg and pain be damned, Matthew couldn’t help the fit of laughter that escaped. Alice’s cheeks flushed a pretty pink even as she bit her lips to hide her smile at Matthew’s laughter. 

 

“I’d forgotten about your cat,” he grinned. “Feisty thing.”

 

She smiled fondly, “There are some days I miss her. For a long time she was my only companion.”

 

“Tell me about her?”

 

“Oh she was feisty, definitely had an opinion about everything and let it be known,” Alice giggled. “Miss Prim and Proper and always wanted attention while getting into so much mischief.”

 

“Where’d you get her?”

 

“A couple of terms into university. My favorite professor had run across a pregnant cat and offered up the kittens to anyone who passed her rigorous testing to make sure the kittens would be taken care of out of her students. I was one of the lucky few who got one.”

 

Matthew smiled, imagining a younger Alice gazing curiously down at a demanding fluff ball of a kitten and choosing that one. “I bet Miss Prim and Proper had quite the name.”

 

Alice hummed in agreement, a grin spreading across her face at the memory of her old companion. “She did. My professor laughed so hard when I told her. I’d named my cat after a close friend of hers. The Honorable Miss Phryne Fisher was a fitting name for my cat. I usually ended up calling her Fish though.”

 

Matthew laughed, his hands smoothing up and down Alice’s back as she joined in. She stroked his cheek as if she still couldn’t believe he was hers. Matthew tucked a stray curl behind her ear with a fond smile - he couldn’t believe it either. She smiled and shifted until she could comfortably lay against his chest, his heart under her ear and her arms wrapping around his torso as though she couldn’t bear the distance between them anymore after confirming they were soulmates. He circled his arms around Alice, holding her close, feeling her matching rapid heartbeat against his chest, and he pressed a kiss to her hairline. It felt right; it felt like home to have her in his arms.

 

It was late, both of them should be asleep by now and Matthew knew the nurses would be making their rounds soon, but neither made the move to leave. He smoothed his hands over her upper back - feeling her contented sigh more than hearing it - and he felt himself relaxing even more than he had on the drugs.

 

“Sleep, Matthew,” Alice murmured, her own voice sounding drowsy to his ears. “I’ll be here when you wake.”

 

* * *

 

Alice’s weight on his chest was gone when he woke the next morning. He frowned without opening his eyes. ‘ _ Perhaps it was all a dream _ ’

 

“Do you always look this grumpy in the morning?” Alice’s voice, matter-of-fact even in the early hour, convinced him to peek a look. She sat on the chair next to his bed, in fresh clothes, her hair tidied and makeup redone, and a steaming cup of tea in her hands. With a smile, she sipped at it and raised her eyebrows at him, still expecting an answer.

 

“Was that a rhetorical question or are you expecting a serious answer?” He grumbled. Matthew’s distaste for the morning melted a little at Alice’s soft chuckle.

 

“A bit of both, maybe.”

 

“I’m always grumpy, haven’t you heard?” He relished in her laughter, her eyes damn near sparkled in the early morning light. 

 

Matthew reached out a hand and Alice took it, she smiled when he pulled her to sit on the bed beside his hip. Leaning over to place her teacup on the bedside table, Alice shifted until she was comfortable and gave him her full attention.

 

“How are you this morning, sweetheart?”

 

She ducked her head, her smile widening as a blush spread over her cheeks at the term of endearment. 

 

“I’m fine, Matthew. The cuts don’t really hurt anymore. And you? Did you sleep well?”

 

He nodded, “The medication they have me on is strong. Though, the company last night wasn’t too bad either.”

 

With a soft tut, Alice halfheartedly swatted at his arm even as the flush of her cheeks deepened. Matthew grinned. He lifted her hand and kissed the backs of her fingers simply because he could, the seemingly ever-present warmth in his chest expanding at Alice’s smile.

 

A knock on the door of his room shattered the moment and they both looked up to see a slightly sheepish Mattie O’Brien peeking into the room. Alice stood abruptly, but Matthew kept a grip on her hand.

 

“Sorry to interrupt,” Mattie started softly, “but I need to do a check up on Superintendent Lawson. I can change your bandages too, Doctor Harvey, since you’re here.”

 

* * *

 

“It’s alright, Miss O’Brien,” Matthew waved her in. Alice tried to draw back, but a soft squeeze on her hand and a reassuring smile from Matthew held her in place standing by his bed. The reveal of their bond was still new, still fresh, and Alice wasn’t sure if she wanted to share that with the world just yet. 

 

Mattie said nothing, though, of them holding hands or the fact that Alice was there at all. (She’d stopped by in the night, checking on Charlie, and seen the two of them asleep on Matthew’s bed. Suddenly the cuts on Alice’s hands and matching scars on Matthew yesterday made sense. They were good for each other.)

 

Alice watched quietly as Mattie checked on the wrappings around Matthew’s leg, her touch sure yet gentle. Matthew’s hand tightened in hers at the same time Alice felt an echo of his pain in her own leg at each probe of Mattie’s hands. She rubbed her thumb across his knuckles to soothe him through the check up and to ease the worry in her own mind. Mattie gave him another dose of pain medication and changed out the bottle of fluids for his IV next to his bed.

 

Mattie smiled, her voice straightforward as she updated Matthew on the state of his leg (the x-rays weren’t back yet, they weren’t sure if he’d be able to walk, or how soon he’d be able to, at this point), and then turned to look expectantly at Alice.

 

Alice sighed and made to sit down on the chair by Matthew’s bed, only to be pulled to his bed by the man himself, “Matthew…”

 

“S’more comfortable, sweetheart.”

 

She flushed so much she felt her ears burning - that pain medication settled in fast. Mattie’s chuckle turned into a cough at Alice’s narrowed look, but the smile remained on the nurse’s face. Sensing a losing battle, Alice sat on the edge of Matthew’s bed while Mattie sat in the chair and undid her bandages.

 

Matthew’s hand was warm in hers as Mattie unwound the gauze around her knees and made sure there were no lingering shards of glass in the cuts. She winced as Mattie cleaned them - Matthew’s fingers tightening minutely around hers with each stinging swipe. A square of gauze covered the cuts on her knees instead of a length of bandage wrapped around her legs and Mattie repeated the process on her arms and hands. She wound bandages around Alice’s palms, gently advising Alice to let the cuts breathe overnight and to see Lucien if she needed any help with her hands.

 

“You really should take a few days off work to let them heal, but knowing you, Dr. Harvey, you’d just insist on working anyways.” Mattie grinned at the exasperated look on Alice’s face and the low chuckle from Matthew.

 

“I’ll refrain from putting my hands in any chest cavities, if that makes you feel better, Miss O’Brien, but nothing will get done in the morgue if I’m not there.” At Matthew’s bark of laughter, Alice smiled, “Alright, nothing will get done  _ on time _ in the morgue if I’m not there to help Lucien.”

 

“Let me or Lucien know if you need anything for the pain,” Mattie’s hand on her shoulder was hesitant, but warm, and Alice smiled softly at the young nurse. She had a talent with people, that was for sure. 

 

Mattie smiled back at Alice and patted Matthew on his shoulder before she left the room. A tug on Alice’s hand brought her attention back to Matthew and she smiled down at him.

 

“You know, I  _ do _ have work to do, Matthew.”

 

“Nah, y’don’t.”

 

Alice laughed, “Yes, I do, you silly man.”

 

A dopey, boyish grin appeared on Matthew’s face (she’d never noticed that he had dimples, they were adorable) as he tried to pull Alice closer to him on the bed. She blushed as heat flooded her body when his hands smoothed over her waist, back, and hips.

 

“Matthew.” She tried to look at him sternly, but a girlish giggle broke through her control. “Matthew Lawson, you are a deviant.”

 

“Only with you, sweetheart.”

 

“That pain medication kicked in quickly, too.” She swatted at his chest, her fingertips barely grazing it as she was too busy laughing. Calming her laughter, Alice leaned over and pressed a kiss to his forehead simply because she could, her thumb wiping away the smudge of lipstick before her hand trailed down to stroke his cheek. The thrumming in her chest, the one that brought her to the man lying before her, filled her with light and warmth; her heart filled with joy at Matthew’s grin.

 

She was home.

 

(Neither of them caught Mattie in the window, watching the two of them with a fond look before she left for her rounds.)

 

‘ _ Definitely good for each other _ ,’ she thought as she walked away with a smile.

 

* * *

 

The morgue was blissfully silent as Alice took inventory. Usually Lucien helped her - their banter and discussion over the latest scientific theories filling the tiled room with a friendship born of a shared interest in medical science - but he was finishing up their case at the police station with Hobart and Charlie. She didn’t mind it, actually thankful that she avoided an interrogation from Lucien about her and Matthew yet again.

 

‘ _ Knowing Lucien _ ,’ she thought, ‘ _ he’s just biding his time until the only thing between him and his insatiable curiosity is another dead body _ .’

 

The thought of a murder keeping Lucien occupied so he’d keep his nose in his own business made Alice chuckle. Not even murder would even keep him from satisfying his questions; at the hospital she saw the coiled energy behind his eyes, begging to pepper her and Matthew with queries. Her own escape from Matthew’s room to change her clothes and later Jean in the exam room served as buffers between her and her closest friend. She’d eventually tell him, but Alice still wanted to bask in the newness of her bond with Matthew for a little bit before others crowded in.

 

A knock on the door interrupted Alice’s mental tally of disposable scalpels and she frowned. The frown remained on her face as she looked up to see who had invaded the sanctuary of the morgue.

 

A half-sheepish smirk graced the redhead’s face as she peered around the door. “Sorry to interrupt, but I’m looking for Doctor Harvey?”

 

“That would be me.”

 

The redhead’s eyebrows rose and Alice inwardly sighed; she’d evidently been expecting someone else.

 

“Can I help you?” Alice asked, trying to keep her tone even. She never had patience for interruptions; she usually left them for Lucien to handle.

 

“Rose Anderson,” the younger woman strode forward boldly with an extended hand. Alice looked at it and then up at Miss Anderson’s face before she shook the offered hand. Miss Anderson smiled, “You’re not what I thought I’d see when Uncle asked to stop by here.”

 

“Uncle?”

 

She nodded, smile still in place and Alice thought it looked familiar. “Uncle Matthew, he wanted to stop here before we go to the police station.”

 

The familiarity clicked into place. Rose Anderson shared the same smile with Matthew when both of them were trying to be polite - bland with a hint of mischief around the corners. “Is he here? Your uncle?”

 

Miss Anderson nodded again, “He’s outside, I’ll bring you to him, Doctor Harvey.”

 

“Thank you, Miss Anderson.” Alice put aside her inventory list and followed Matthew’s niece out of autopsy. 

 

He had a niece. Alice filed this away, resolving to ask Matthew about it later. He’d never mentioned a niece, but then again, he barely talked about his family with Alice in their few conversations outside of work. She knew his childhood wasn’t the greatest, and she wondered if he’d tried to protect his sibling (or siblings) much like she tried to protect her sister. There was still so much to learn about each other. 

 

The brisk, cool air hit her once they left the building and Alice was glad she’d kept her lab coat on. She smiled when she saw Matthew waiting by a bench, no longer feeling the wind at the warmth of his returned smile.

 

“I’ll leave you two to it,” Miss Anderson threw over her shoulder with a smirk, one that had Matthew rolling his eyes in response.

 

“God, she’s too much like her mother,” he groused as Alice settled on the bench by his wheelchair. Her hand sought his out instinctively and Matthew’s playful scowl at Rose Anderson quirked into a smile as he tangled his fingers with hers.

 

Alice chuckled, “Not a good thing?”

 

“It is except when you’re on the receiving end of it like I was with Vera for most of my childhood.” His face was gruff, but Alice could see the tenderness and fondness in it towards the young woman leaning against the cab on the street. 

 

She smiled and took a moment to watch Matthew. He was out of uniform again, this being only the second time she’d seen him in regular clothes - not including his pajamas in the hospital. The bright cobalt blue of his sweater stood out from the grey trousers and dark brown leather of his jacket. It brought out his eyes (Alice noted that his eyes were quickly becoming a favorite of hers).

 

“How are you, Matthew?”

 

“Been better, and tired of people asking me that question, but I’m glad to be out of the hospital.” He smiled at her and she chuckled. “You?”

 

“I haven’t shoved my hands into any open chest cavities in the past few days if that’s what you’re wondering.” Alice grinned at Matthew’s laughter. His thumb rubbed her knuckles as he shifted in his seat. His movement drew her attention to his injured leg. “Have they said any more about your leg?”

 

* * *

 

Matthew nodded, his good mood dimming as he looked down at the leg stretched out in front of him. He was grateful for Lucien saving his life - grateful that he didn’t wake up without a leg at all - but the news that he was crippled had shattered his expectations for his life. His career was at an end, his life turned upside down all by a man behind the wheel of a car. Matthew’s fist tightened on his leg. It wasn’t fair.

 

“It’ll never heal properly. I’ll walk, but probably with a cane or something just as humiliating. I suppose the higher ups in Melbourne are happy that they’ve finally gotten me off the force again.”

 

“Then…?”

 

Matthew didn’t want to leave her, didn’t want to be apart from Alice so soon after the reveal of their bond to each other. It wasn’t fair.

 

He nodded again, answering the question hanging in the air between them. “I’m sorry, sweetheart, but I have to leave again. There’s recovery and learning how to walk again, I can’t do that here in Ballarat.”

 

* * *

 

“Don’t apologize for putting your health first, Matthew Lawson,” Alice chided him, her voice firm even as her spirit sank. They’d only just found each other and now circumstances were forcing them apart yet again. It wasn’t fair. Finally the universe had pulled the two of them together, albeit through less than kind circumstances, but they were finally here at this point in their relationship. It wasn’t fair.

 

“Where will you be going?”

 

“Melbourne,” Matthew answered. “Through Lucien and Rose, I have a spot at the university’s hospital. They’re running a sort of program where the students learn about different injuries and we get the help. Lucien assures me it’s not exactly like a hospital, more like a home, but I’ll admit… I’m not fond of it.”

 

Alice reached out and squeezed his arm, “I still have a few friends at the university, would you like me to have them drop in and… make sure everything is running smoothly?”

 

“You don’t have to, sweetheart.”

 

“I want to, Matthew,” she smoothed her hand up and down his forearm.

 

* * *

 

God he was so grateful for Alice.

 

When he first heard about her, people said she was blunt, socially inept, abrasive, and hard to work with; now that he knew her better, Matthew saw most of what was said about her was untrue. She was blunt, didn’t always read a room or people right in social situations, but there was a softness to her that most people didn’t get to see. Alice rarely lowered the walls around herself, and Matthew loved that he was one of the few she felt comfortable enough around him to do that. 

 

She had an empathy that made him feel like he could get through anything with her support, though he couldn’t stop the rising thought of shame at Alice being stuck with a crippled soulmate. A part of him wondered how long she’d stay until she realized she would be settling in loving him. Another part - the highly optimistic part - fought with his usual pessimistic nature in the knowledge in Alice’s feelings for him on top of the bonding. It didn’t completely wipe away his doubts, but it helped. Alice helped.

 

His free hand landed on her knee and squeezed, “If you’d like, you can do that, Alice. Maybe I can grill them for some old stories of you.” He winked at her and laughed at her narrowed look.

 

“Just remember I can return the favor, Superintendent.”

 

* * *

 

Matthew smiled and lifted her hand to press a kiss to her knuckles before holding her hand with both of his. Alice blushed and threaded her fingers in his; she could get used to this, Alice realized. Their easy companionship, kisses pressed to backs of hands and foreheads (‘ _ Hopefully more _ ,’ Alice mused with a smile), the steady silences that neither felt the need to fill with words, his warm hands in hers. She definitely could get used to it all and that thought no longer scared her as much as it once did.

 

She was falling for him, hard and fast. Normally this revelation would have her running for the hills, pulling up her walls out of fear of being hurt, but this was Matthew. Matthew, who was patient with her, who apologized when he stepped out of line, who was kind under his gruff exterior. The circumstances that finally brought them together were not ideal, and it wasn’t fair that those circumstances were now forcing them apart, again. It wasn’t fair that Matthew was in pain, that he’d likely not walk without assistance, and the higher ups in Melbourne were pushing him out of the force.

 

It just wasn’t fair.

 

* * *

 

He could fall for her, Matthew thought. He loved her and could fall in love with her. It wasn’t just because of the bonding; that helped certainly, but they had been circling each other long before finding out they were each other’s soulmates. He loved her blunt nature, her tunnel vision when it came to science, and the way her hand fit in his - the coolness of her fingers against his palms. 

 

She’d wormed her way into his mind and now his heart, settling easily beneath his own protective walls like Lucien and Jean had done years before. Alice made him laugh, didn’t push when he needed to sort his thoughts out, and he felt comfortable around her regardless of his mood. 

 

Yes, he definitely could fall for her.

 

* * *

 

“Can I kiss you?” Matthew’s voice was sudden and soft, barely audible above the breeze that swirled fallen leaves around the bench she sat on. 

 

She looked up at him, his eyes shining with an emotion she couldn’t quite place before she looked down at their tangled hands on his wheelchair armrest. “I’m not sure I’ll want to let you go if you do that, Matthew.”

 

He chuckled, one of his hands coming up to curl beneath her chin, tilting her face up. “I think I’ll take my chances.”

 

“Then…” She leaned into his touch, casting a fleeting look down at his lips before she met his gaze. “By all means, Superintendent, take it.”

 

Matthew leaned over the armrest and she met him in the middle; his lips brushed hesitantly over hers before slanting his mouth more firmly over her own. Alice gasped at the pleasant jolt in her stomach when Matthew kissed her and he took the opportunity to cradle her face in his hands. She closed her eyes and hummed in the back of her throat as one of the hands slid into her wind-teased curls to cup the back of her head. 

 

Heat flooded her senses, her heartbeat thudded in her ears as she pressed as close to Matthew as she could and remain appropriate for being outside the hospital. She slid her hands up to grasp the sheepskin collar of his jacket, her fingers tightening in it when Matthew drew back. One of his hands fell to her shoulder, his thumb gently rubbing it through the fabric of her lab coat.

 

“Well-”

 

Alice didn’t let him finish, instead she pulled him back by his collar and captured his lips in her own again. The hand on her shoulder tightened instinctively, Matthew’s faint murmur of surprise vibrating against her lips as he gently nipped at her bottom lip. They separated slowly, lips brushing against each other as though reluctant to actually part for longer than a few seconds.

 

Alice leaned her forehead against Matthew’s, smiling as he nuzzled her nose with his own. “I did warn you.”

 

Matthew chuckled, “Seeing as you’ve yet to let go of my jacket, I’ll have to agree with you, sweetheart.”

 

She loosened her hold on his jacket, idly smoothing out the garment, and drew back from his embrace far enough to look in his eyes. “I’ll come visit, Matthew, once you’re settled.”

 

“I’d like that,” his fingers caressed her cheek and she mirrored him. Her thumb rubbed away remnants of her lipstick on his mouth and Matthew grinned as she blushed faintly. His thumb traced her cheekbone reverently, “I can ask Jean for your number and call you once I’m there, Alice.”

 

She smiled, “I’ll do one better and give it to you now.” Reaching into her lab coat, Alice pulled out the small notepad and pen she always kept in the pockets. She wrote her flat number and address before giving him the sheet of paper. He took it with a soft, chaste kiss, smiling against her lips.

 

“Thank you, sweetheart.”

 

Alice looked over his shoulder and saw Rose walking in their direction. She stole one last kiss from him, blinking back the sudden tears in her eyes as she wiped away the traces of her lipstick. 

 

It wasn’t fair, but they would make do.

 

His thumb caught a stray tear and he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I have to go.”

 

“I know. I don’t want you to, but I know you have to leave to get better.”

 

“And I will,” Matthew smiled, his eyes glassy with unshed tears. “I’ll look forward to when you visit and we’ll talk.”

 

“Stay safe, I’ll know if you don’t,” Alice smiled when he let out a short bark of laughter right as Rose reached them.

 

“You too, Alice,” he kissed her cheek one last time before looking up at his niece. “Right, Rose.”

 

“Ready to go, Uncle?”

 

“One last stop at the police station and then I will be.”

 

“Okay,” Rose nodded, smiling at Alice as she slowly wheeled Matthew away.

 

“I’ll watch over Lucien for you!” Alice shouted after them.

 

“Both of you better stay out of trouble!” Matthew shouted back and Alice laughed.

 

She wiped away her tears as they fell, waving at the cab until it turned the corner. Letting out a sigh that she felt in her whole body, Alice stood from the bench, her heart both lighter after their kisses, and heavier at their separation for the foreseeable future. She walked back into the morgue slowly, her fingers tracing her lips - Alice imagined they still tingled - as she smiled. Warmth filled her chest and bubbled up in a soft giggle. She was happy, very happy, something she never saw for herself let alone in another person. 

 

Alice had been content - long before the scars from Matthew appeared - in being comfortable with her life. She never expected to truly be fully happy, but still satisfied with herself and her work. She never imagined finding a home in a sleepy gold rush town, in an standing offer of dining over at the Blake household, in friends such as Lucien, Jean, and Mattie. She never imagined finding her soulmate in the one person that understood her as well as Matthew.

 

It made sense, that he understood her, if one stood on the fact that the universe provided people with their perfect match. Alice, who believed in science and what she could see, was slowly coming around to this fact with the reveal of Matthew as her soulmate. Where once she’d doubted she would ever receive the marking, now she looked forward to getting to know her soulmate better.

 

Alice couldn’t wait to see Matthew again, but she was also a patient woman.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> centered around 4.02, Mattie comes to Alice for advice about London, Alice learns a new hobby, and she hears from Matthew for the first time since he's left Ballarat

Alice sighed as she stretched in her seat. The water in their deceased's lungs was sent off for testing, so Alice had a bit of extra time to work on registrar paperwork and the backlog of reports.

(Irately, Alice noted that Lucien always seemed to disappear whenever there were reports to be done.)

Rotating her wrist, she read over the report in front of her as someone knocked on the doorjamb of her office. Alice answered without even looking up. "No, Lucien, the test results haven't come back yet; quit bothering me."

"I'm sorry to disturb you, Doctor Harvey."

Alice's eyebrows rose as she looked up to see Mattie O'Brien standing in the doorway of her office. The district nurse shifted from foot to foot subtly and wrung her hands in front of her. Mattie had never been nervous around Alice before, why was she nervous now?

"You're not the one disturbing me, Miss O'Brien. What brings you here?"

Mattie's shoulders relaxed a fraction as she stepped further into the office. "Do you have a minute? To talk, I mean."

"Of course, please sit," Alice gestured to the chair beside her desk - empty for once - and put aside her pen to give Mattie her attention. She waited until Mattie sat down before she spoke again, "What did you want to talk about? I'm not sure I can help."

"You help more than you think, Doctor Harvey."

Alice smiled, still not used to the feeling of being accepted and appreciated by others. "Please, it's Alice."

"Alice," Mattie smiled. "I've had a job offer and I'm not sure if I should take it."

"A job offer?"

She nodded, "It's a wonderful chance, a good hospital, and an experience of a lifetime."

"But?"

Mattie bit her bottom lip, her eyes starting to shine with unshed tears, "But I don't know if I want to leave Ballarat for London."

"You don't know if you want to leave the home you've created here?" Alice supplied, nodding when Mattie ducked her head. She couldn't blame Mattie; Alice wouldn't want to leave the wonderful support system here in Ballarat either (her heart called for Matthew, but Ballarat was her home now). "Is it just the job offer and leaving Ballarat that's troubling you, Miss O'Brien?"

"Please call me Mattie, Alice," Mattie sniffled. "And no, it's not just those things. I don't exactly know how to put it into words."

"Take your time," Alice smiled, taking a leaf out of Lucien's book to offer Mattie a listening ear. She felt awkward; emotional conversations were more Jean and Lucien's purview, Matthew was the only one she felt comfortable enough with in these types of talks. Mattie had come to her, though, and so Alice strove to try her hardest to help her.

Mattie looked down at her lap; her hands twisted in it (Alice could see a multitude of emotions flash across her face, but no tears fell) until she clasped them together and looked back up at Alice. "May I… May I ask you a potentially personal question?"

Alice's mind whirled at what sort of question Mattie would ask - after all she  _had_  seen Matthew and Alice in the hospital together - and Alice's hands itched to do something other than sit and chat, but she tamped down on that urge.

She cleared her throat, realizing she'd been staring at Mattie instead of answering her. "You may. I can't promise I'll answer it the way you want, but I'll try."

"Thank you," Mattie smiled. "What… brought you here to Ballarat? Was it just the job opening in pathology or…?"

"It-" Alice sighed and chewed on the inside of her cheek. Mattie's question wasn't as personal as she thought it would be, but explaining that it was the marking that brought her here was difficult to put into words that didn't make her sound strange. "I don't know if I can describe it well enough. It  _was_  the job opening here in the hospital, but it was also more than that."

"How so?"

Alice chewed harder on her cheek, wondering if Matthew could feel it in Melbourne. "Ever since I turned eighteen there's always been something there. More than just the marking, I had a feeling in my chest that sort of… pulled. It was -  _is_  - a warm feeling that wasn't always active. It flared up at odd moments, sometimes lying dormant for years. Somehow I knew it was telling me how to find my soulmate, but it never pushed. Over the years before I came to Ballarat, that feeling helped me focus and comforted me when I had hard days in school or at work. When I saw the notice for the pathology opening, it resurfaced and pulled me here."

"So a feeling brought you here, to Ballarat and Matthew?" Mattie asked as she leaned back in the chair, listening with rapt attention to Alice. "Is it connected to the marking?"

Alice nodded, "I… yes? I think of it as a sort of… tether connecting you and your soulmate, I guess. The closer you get, the more that feeling comes up, the more you feel drawn to them. You… do… ?"

"Have one? Yes, I think so," Mattie smiled. "Some of the scars are a bit strange, I think they work with animals. There are a lot of scratch marks and odd shaped bruises that remind me of animals at least."

"And you have this feeling in your chest?"

Mattie nodded, "I think it's pulling me, like you said, to London."

"Do you want to go?"

"I do, not just because of the feeling, but because the job offer at St. Bart's is too good to pass up. I'm just worried how Lucien will take it."

Ah, that was the problem. Mattie looked up to Lucien like a father, Alice had observed that much in the past year or so. "I think he'd be happy for you, Mattie."

"It's just… Lucien said something the other day when I got back from Melbourne."

Alice sighed, "What did he do now?"

Mattie laughed, "Nothing bad, I promise. He said that the house felt too empty without me there. He might have spoken before he thought it all the way through; I haven't told him about London."

"But you have told Jean?"

"I have, she thinks it's wonderful and that I should take it." Mattie smiled fondly. "I want to."

"Then you should. Lucien will understand."

Her smile widened as she shook her head in disbelief, "You make it sound so easy, Alice."

Alice smiled back, "Nothing in life is terribly easy, but the only negative thing about this job offer I see is having to leave the Blakes and Ballarat. I hope you realize that they're not going anywhere, you'll always have a home with them, right?"

"Of course, and you're included in that home, Alice. I know I could always come to you for an honest opinion; you've taught me so much about being confident in myself and my work."

"Me?"

"Yes you, Alice."

"I don't know what to say."

"It's alright," the younger nurse smiled and reached out to hold Alice's hands in hers. Alice started, not used to this type of affection from Mattie. "Thank you for helping me today, Alice, I really appreciate it. You helped put things in perspective."

Alice relaxed and smiled at Mattie, some of her anxiety over whether or not she'd say the wrong thing ebbing away at Mattie's new determination.

"I'm happy to help. When do you have to tell the hospital in London?"

"By tomorrow, and I'm going to accept the job offer. There's a whole new adventure out there, waiting for me and I think I'm ready to start it."

"Good, I'm glad."

* * *

Alice sat down on the couch in the Blakes' living room with a sigh that she felt in her bones. If she never had to see another container of water ever again in her life, it would be too soon.

"Long day?" Jean asked as she brought their tea in from the kitchen.

"Thank you, Jean," Alice smiled as she accepted her tea (made just the way she liked it, Jean remembered since their first tea together) and sat back with another sigh. "That husband of yours is…"

"Oh don't tell me, demanding and oblivious?"

"Yes!"

Jean chuckled as she sipped at her own tea, "What now?"

"He's making me test water samples. I spent all day today and yesterday doing just that, preparing slides and comparing them to water we found in… oh, what was his name?"

"Reg Foster?"

"Yes, him. We found water in Reg Foster's lungs but it wasn't chlorinated - which means he didn't drown in the pool - so Lucien's had me trying to narrow down the possible location where he drowned while he galivants around with that new superintendent. I've just about had it with him."

Jean outright laughed that time. It did little to stop Alice's ire at her coworker, but at least his wife was getting a kick out of him annoying someone else. Her time with Jean was her only respite for the week and Alice definitely wasn't standing her friend up, not even for Lucien or an active case. Visiting Jean kept her calm - well, calmer than she would have been without her support.

Plus, she ran out of shortbread a couple of days ago.

"You know how Lucien gets on an active case. I thought he'd gotten better at it, but I guess some habits you can't break so easily."

"You're not the one testing the water samples. He keeps bringing more!"

"I'm sorry Alice," Jean grinned, her hand reaching out to pat Alice's forearm reassuringly. "Still up for learning how to knit today?"

Alice sighed and finished her tea, "It might help me relax, but I'm still not sure about it."

"It'll give you something to do with your hands at least, maybe help distract you from the water samples."

"We'll see."

Knitting was both simple and complex at the same time. For all her confidence with a scalpel (and her growing confidence in the kitchen), Alice was all thumbs with knitting needles. Still, it distracted her from her irritation at Lucien for the moment as she took out her frustration on knitting.

Pausing in her attempt at making some semblance of a knitted garment instead of a tangle of yarn, Alice absentmindedly rubbed her right knee. It and the scar around it ached on and off this past week since Matthew had gone to Melbourne; she wondered what he was up to at the hospital.

"Any news from Matthew?" Jean asked, noticing Alice's pause. (Alice noted that Jean's own knitting was almost perfect, the stitches neat and orderly in tight rows of light blue yarn.)

The hand on her knee stilled briefly before she continued her movements, hoping to alleviate the ache. "No, not yet. It's only been about a week though. He said he'd call when he settled."

"I'm sure he will soon. How are your hands?"

"Much better," Alice showed her palms to Jean, who noted the scratches had mostly healed - the new skin a bright pink on the edges while the middle of the cuts were still a little scabbed over. "Maybe Lucien will let me do more in the morgue soon."

"Itching to get back to work?"

Alice nodded, "There's only so much paperwork, testing, and examining that I can oversee but not do before I start to go mad. He did let me open up a man's skull this week though."

Jean chuckled, "I think I heard about that. Wasn't it when he asked you about Matthew?"

Alice grinned, "He'll think twice about interrogating me over a dead body in the future."

"I sense a story."

Alice shrugged, but she couldn't help the mischievous smile that spread across her face, "Perhaps."

Her thoughts drifted back to the day Lucien finally managed to get her alone after Matthew's accident, coincidently over a dead body in the morgue.

" _Doctor Harvey," Lucien's tone immediately put her on guard. He'd mercifully left Alice alone since Matthew left for Melbourne, but her luck finally ran out._

" _Doctor Blake."_

" _I saw Matthew the other day, before he left."_

_Alice paused her work - sawing open a man's skull - and looked up at Lucien. "What of it?"_

_Lucien raised his eyebrows, looking entirely too innocent for it to be real, "Nothing, I just noticed he looked more happy than when I first saw him after the accident."_

" _And?"_

" _And I was wondering if you had anything to do with it, Alice."_

_She returned to her work, ignoring his obvious fishing expedition in favor of figuring out how the man before them died. The healing cuts on her hands ached with the work and she wondered if Matthew could feel it. The thought made her blush and Alice inwardly cursed when she saw Lucien's grin on the edge of her vision._

" _Aha! You did have something to do with it!"_

" _You are well aware that I'm currently holding a bone saw, Doctor Blake, and know how to use it?"_

" _I… yes," Lucien cleared his throat and gestured to the man in front of them. "Shall we continue?"_

" _We shall."_

_They fell back into their usual autopsy routine, weighing and examining the organs, throwing theories back and forth as new evidence popped up from the body. Lucien stitched the body back up while Alice finished the paperwork without another word from him about Matthew._

" _Lucien."_

" _Yes?" He looked up from the y-incision on the body to see Alice watching him from her stool. "What is it, Alice?"_

" _I told him," The look on her face was peaceful, her eyes shining with happiness, even as she twisted her hands in her lap while telling him. It was still hard for Alice to open up to him about personal matters. "I told Matthew."_

" _That… you are soulmates?" At Alice's nod, Lucien grinned, "Alice that's wonderful news! How did he take it?"_

" _He's happy... we're happy."_

" _Good. I take it you'll be spending some time up in Melbourne in the coming months?"_

_Alice nodded, her shoulders relaxing as she smiled. "Matthew said he'd call when he settles. I was going to ask you about that once he did, Lucien, but only if you're-"_

" _Alice," he held up a hand to stem her explanation, "you can take all the time you want when Matthew calls. The two of you have more than earned it."_

_Alice grinned and Lucien couldn't help but smile back._

* * *

 "You threatened him with a bone saw!" Jean laughed as Alice finished her recount of that day in the morgue. "I can't blame you, Alice, I may have brandished his own saw at him in a vaguely threatening way more times than I can count."

Alice joined Jean in her laughter, "I'm glad I'm not the only one. He's lucky a bone saw wasn't anywhere near when he got smart about the water samples earlier."

"Oh Lucien," Jean sighed in exasperation as she and Alice tried to untangle the knot of Alice's attempted knitting. "I hope you put him in his place, Alice."

"I thought that was your job."

"Very funny," Jean gave Alice a look, but both of them burst into giggles at the absolute mess of yarn tangled around Alice's hands and the borrowed knitting needles. "Alice, I don't think knitting is working for you. How on Earth did you get it wrapped around your hands like this?"

"I have absolutely no idea! This is hopeless. I think I'll give up on knitting," Alice shook her head with a laugh. Jean managed to unravel the yarn from the needles and Alice watched as her friend patiently found all the knots and gently freed her from the cage of yarn. Alice sat back as Jean rolled the yarn back up into a ball, "That's one hobby I can scratch off my list."

"We'll find you something. You're a working woman, so there's no shame in keeping your hobbies to a minimum. You  _are_  getting better and cooking and baking, Alice. Though, I think it's safe to say knitting is not for you."

Alice felt her cheeks flush with pride at Jean's compliments, but she had to admit Jean was right. Her attempts at cooking were getting better; she burnt things less and the outcomes were tasting more as they should be. Alice wasn't sure if she'd ever get up to Jean's level, but with her help, Alice could continue to hold her own.

"What's next?"

"Maybe sewing? If you like that we can expand it into embroidery and dress making? You've already got the basics from medical school."

"Somehow I don't see that knowing how to sew up a cadaver or a living person is similar to dressmaking, Jean."

"Knots are knots and stitches are stitches, Alice. Help me prep for dinner and we can get a start on sewing while it cooks. With Lucien gallivanting around with Carlyle, I need my expert sous chef to speed things up."

She sat next to Jean as they peeled and cut the vegetables for dinner at the kitchen table, casual banter and bits of gossip either had heard around town passed between them as their hands steadily worked. Jean asked Alice questions about the current case and various tests she ran for it (" _What exactly are diatoms?"_  " _Tiny microorganisms in the water, unique to each body of water." "How do you test for that?" "Put it under a microscope usually and then compare it to the samples gathered." "Oh that's interesting."_ )

Alice asked Jean for stories about Matthew since she'd known him longer (" _I_ _ **am**_   _going to ask him, Jean, but I'd like to know more about him from others as well._ " " _I'm afraid Lucien would know more, I only met Matthew when I started working for Lucien's father. I can tell you that he's always been kind. I'm so happy you two found each other._ " " _I am too._ ") Dinner prepped and popped into the oven for a few hours, Jean and Alice cleaned up the kitchen.

"Mind putting the kettle on, Alice? I'll go get my sewing kit and we can see if that's going to be your new hobby," Jean grinned at Alice's slightly anxious look.

"Of course."

"Thank you!" Jean called back over her shoulder, her voice bright and cheery, as she exited the kitchen.

Being around Jean always made Alice smile. She was so thankful of their unlikely friendship. Alice didn't have a lot of friendships, so she cherished Jean's companionship. No matter how many mistakes Alice made or how many times she put her foot in it when they spoke, Jean remained patient in her mentorship. It had taken them a few tries - a few missteps - to get to where they were now, but Alice was grateful both stuck it out.

Alice readied their cups out of rote memory from the many times they'd taken tea together as the kettle boiled. As she poured the boiled water into the teapot with the tea to steep, the Blake telephone rang.

"Could you get that, Alice? I'm having trouble finding my kit!" Jean's muffled voice called from the studio.

"Blake residence," Alice answered dutifully.

" _Having your weekly tea with Jean, sweetheart?_ " Matthew's voice crackled down the line and a wide smile spread across her face.

Her cheeks grew warm and she couldn't help the slight chuckle that escaped her. "I love a routine, Matthew. I take it you've settled?"

" _I have. I meant to call earlier, it's been a bit of whirlwind since I've gotten to Melbourne._ "

"It's alright, I understand. How's the hospital?"

" _The food leaves something to be desired, but the hospital is pretty nice place overall. Lucien was right in that it feels a bit more like a home. At least the walls are a different color than the hospital in Ballarat_."

Alice laughed, "They must have remodeled since I was there then. Last time I saw it, the walls were whitewashed and boring."

" _The green isn't much better then_ ," His dry response had her laughing more. " _How's home?_ "

"Good, same old Ballarat; full of gossip, scandals, and new cases."

" _Lucien still up to his usual antics?_ "

"Don't get me started," she groused even as Matthew laughed on the other end. "He's running around with the new superintendent while I'm the one stuck doing the actual science in the morgue on top of my registrar duties."

" _At least the science will be done right, then._ "

Warmth filled her at his compliment, "Lucien's just as capable, Matthew."

" _I know, but between the two of us, I think you're smarter._ "

Alice laughed richly, "I'll keep that in mind."

" _Much prettier too_."

" _Matthew_ ," Alice looked around to see if Jean had come back yet, her cheeks bright red as Matthew laughed on the other end of the phone. (She hadn't, odd) "I… I know you don't like this question, Matthew, but… how are you, really?"

He sighed and she heard him shift around on the other end of the phone. The dull ache in her knee returned; Alice flexed it to try to alleviate some of the pain.

" _Since it's_ _ **you**_   _asking, Alice… I don't mind answering. Truth be told, I'm tired. The trip here and settling into the hospital routine wore me out more than I thought it would. I'm still stuck in a bed and they've had me on painkillers, but the doctors are happy with the healing progress so far._ "

"That's good to hear, Matthew. I… I feel it sometimes. I'd wondered what they were putting you up to in the hospital."

" _I'm still bedridden. The femur has to fully heal and so do the stitches, but I think they said those can come out within the next week or so. Once the muscles rest a bit more after the break's done healing, they'll start on in bed stretches to build the muscle back up. After that depends on how well that goes._ "

"That's hopeful."

" _It is. I've felt yours too, you know. How are the hands?_ "

"Almost healed. I can get them dirty again soon."

" _Like you weren't already, I felt that too._ "

She chuckled, "Lucien let me open up a man's skull."

" _ **That's**_   _what that was, I'd wondered… was it fun?"_

"Oh, absolutely."

Matthew laughed, " _My Lady of Death. I'm glad he's letting you do more in autopsy now that your hands are better._   _Have he and Jean given you the third degree yet?_ "

"They've tried. Lucien has at least."

" _Of course he has,_ " his laughter rang out down the line, " _Jean's much more subtle and knows when to stop prying, thankfully._ "

"Oh, Lucien stopped once he remembered I had a bone saw in my hands," Alice smiled when Matthew laughed again. "Jean's been nothing but kind. We attempted knitting today. It's not for me."

" _What's next?_ "

"Sewing apparently, though she has been gone searching for that sewing kit for awhile now."

" _Knowing Lucien's messy habits, it's probably taking her that long just to figure out where he moved it to in the studio._ "

"I wouldn't know."

" _Be glad,_ " Matthew chuckled. " _Sweetheart…_ "

"Yes?" The warmth in her cheeks returned, Alice hoped she would never tire of this feeling.

" _When can I see you?_ "

"Whenever this case is over I can travel to Melbourne for a few days. Maybe this weekend, we're close to wrapping it up, I think."

" _I'm looking forward to it. Here, I'll give you my number and address so you know where to go and can call me._ "

"Okay," Alice pulled the small notepad Jean left by the phone and scribbled down what Matthew told her. Ripping off the sheet and tucking it into her pocket, Alice smiled. "I'll call when we've closed the case and let you know when I'll be up in Melbourne."

" _Good. Tell Jean and Lucien the number and address, please? I don't want to keep you from your time with Jean any longer._ "

"I will and I'll call you later, is that alright?"

" _Definitely, sweetheart._ "

"Take care of yourself, Matthew."

" _You too, Alice_."

The fond smile stayed on her face even after she replaced the phone back on its hook, copied the number and address for the Blakes, and poured the tea (done steeping) into waiting cups.

"Matthew feeling alright?" Jean announced her presence and Alice jumped.

"How did yo-?"

Jean smiled, "I overheard you from the hallway and let the two of you talk in peace. He's alright then?"

Alice nodded, mildly embarrassed at being overheard, but glad Jean leant her some privacy. "They still have him on bedrest for now - to let the leg heal - before he starts therapy. He sounds a lot better than he did right after the accident."

"That's good to hear." Jean set down her sewing kit and a small bundle of fabric on the kitchen table. "Are you going to go see him soon?"

Alice nodded and handed Jean her cup of tea as she sat down. "When this case is done, I'll take a few days."

"Good! We can make a few of his favorites for you to take with you; give Matthew a bit of home."

Alice smiled, "I think he'd like that."

"We'll work on it… tomorrow maybe?" Jean smiled over the rim of her cup as Alice nodded. "So long as Lucien doesn't find some other water samples for you, that is?"

" _Jean_ ," Alice rolled her eyes as her friend laughed. "I thought you were going to help me better my sewing, not tease me."

"I am, I am," Jean laughed more. "Let's finish our tea and we'll get started. You'll stay for dinner?"

Jean phrased it as a question, but Alice knew that she wouldn't be leaving anytime soon if Jean had her way. She smiled and nodded. "I think I will."

"Good."

Jean finished her tea first; she prepped a needle and thread as Alice looked on. Alice had seen these two things - and this gesture - many times growing up, in school (though the needles looked different and the thread was always black), and when she visited Jean for tea.

Her friend threaded the eye of the needle with ease, a motion done so much that it was second nature to Jean, and pulled the fabric in front of her before making a series of stitches along it to show Alice the different types used in sewing, embroidery, and alterations. Alice watched closely; Jean had been right in that knots and stitches were universal, but most of the "stitching" she used in pathology were simple surgical knots. Jean's showcase and explanations of other styles of stitches opened up a whole new world, one filled with history, new experiences, and a traditionally feminine craft she could see herself doing (and enjoying).

* * *

 Jean started Alice off slow; first she showed Alice a type of stitch, explained the use behind it, chained several together, and then let Alice try it herself. She had to admit, Alice picked up on it quickly. Her medical background did help, and Alice admitted she'd learned how to replace buttons and fix torn hems temporarily, but that was the extent of her sewing knowledge.

" _I never found the time to learn it properly," Alice shrugged when Jean asked. "Too busy with my studies and burying myself in my books when I was younger."_

The pathologist took to sewing like a fish to water in just the few hours they spent on it that afternoon. Jean had hoped one of the hobbies would stick (if sewing hadn't worked out, gardening was going to be her next suggestion) and she was glad Alice was enjoying this one. Improving Alice's cooking and baking was starting to be more fun as Alice's confidence grew and they could attempt more complex recipes, but Jean could tell her friend enjoyed sewing a lot more.

"You were right about it being similar to my work, Jean, but this definitely has a prettier end result than stitching up a dead body."

"More colorful too, hm?"

"Definitely," Alice laughed. "I think I like this hobby."

"Good."

Jean let Alice continue to practice while she poured them both fresh cups of tea. Alice looked more relaxed now than she had when first arriving at the Blake household, fuming about Lucien's tedious demands.

(Jean knew Alice respected and trusted Lucien, probably more than she did Jean herself, but sometimes their mutual stubborn natures just clashed.)

"I… had a visit from Mattie earlier this week," Alice's voice startled Jean out of her musings and she looked a little apologetic for doing so.

"You did?" Jean set her teacup aside, giving Alice her full attention.

"She told me about the job in London."

"I'm glad she spoke to someone about it, that is, someone who could probably help her more than me or her parents. It's a good opportunity for her."

"That's what I said," Alice smiled. "She's worried how Lucien will take it. Mattie said he told her the house was too quiet without her when she's gone in Melbourne."

Jean tutted, "That man… he'll adjust and be proud of her. He already  _is_  proud of her. It'll be quiet around here without her for sure, but Mattie deserves this chance."

Alice chuckled, "She told me she was going to take it."

"Oh, good!"

The subject of their discussion entered the kitchen through the sunroom, pausing their conversation. Mattie smiled at both of them and looked down at Alice's handiwork, "This looks like fun!"

"It is," Alice smiled up at the nurse as Jean poured Mattie a cup of tea. "Jean thought I'd like this better than knitting and she was right."

"Jean usually is."

* * *

Mattie sipped at her tea, watching as Jean continued to guide Alice through the few stitches they went over today. (She would miss this, in London, the warm feeling of coming home and talking with Jean, seeking guidance from Alice, or helping Jean out around the kitchen.)

"Penny for your thoughts, Mattie?" Jean asked while Alice practiced blanket stitches along the edge of the fabric.

"I'm… I'm going to take the position at St. Bart's in London."

"That's wonderful news! You must be so excited, Mattie."

"I am," Mattie smiled over the rim of her tea cup. "I'm also a bit scared. My parents aren't too sure about it, but they're willing to support me in it all. I keep trying to tell Lucien, but…"

"He's being an arse?" Alice spoke without looking up from her work.

" _Alice_ ," Jean chided, but the corners of her eyes crinkled with mirth and her voice held little weight behind the scolding.

Mattie laughed.

"He's been running around all over the place the past few days, Mattie, I'm sorry. You know how Lucien gets tunnel vision with his cases." Jean looked apologetic, but Mattie nodded understandingly. "Alice is a little miffed with him over water samples at the moment."

That stopped the pathologist and she looked up with a raised eyebrow. "A little?"

"Alright, more than a little," Jean patted Alice's hand with a smile until Alice smiled back at her. "Do you want me to speak with him?"

"No, I'll do it myself, but thank you, Jean."

Jean turned back to Mattie, "And Mattie, it's quite alright to be scared. London is far, but you'll always have a home to come back here to should you need it."

Mattie looked over at Alice and shared a smile with the pathologist. Alice had been right. Assuming that she could always come back to Ballarat was one thing, but hearing Jean confirm that thought made Mattie feel much better about accepting the placement at St. Bart's. Ballarat, the Blake household, Jean, Lucien, Charlie, Matthew, and Alice would always be home for Mattie and it would still be here if she decided London wasn't for her.

" _Jean!_ " Lucien's voice rang out as soon as he entered the house.

"In the kitchen!" she called back. "Dinner's almost ready!"

Lucien popped his head into the serving window with a smile, which widened at the sight of all of them gathered around the kitchen table. "Wonderful, I'll put my bag up and join you all."

"Are you sure you don't want me to speak with him about sharing duties with you, Alice?" Jean asked once she was sure Lucien had gone into the surgery.

"Quite."

"Alright, let's clear the table then," Jean stood from the table. "Alice, you can put your practice fabric on the table in the dining room. After that Mattie, do you and Alice mind setting the table for four people? Charlie's not getting back until tomorrow."

"Of course, Jean," Mattie smiled as Alice carefully folded up the fabric and took it along with Jean's sewing kit to the formal dining room. She joined Mattie by the cupboard to pull down the dishes and glasses they'd need for dinner while Jean finished up at the stove. Alice pulled out the silverware while Mattie set their places at the table.

Lucien drifted back into the kitchen as Jean began putting dinner on the table. "This looks marvelous, Jean, as always."

"I wouldn't have gotten it done without Alice's help," Jean smiled.

"Well done, Alice, and… thank you for all your testing done these past few days," Lucien reached out and gently squeezed Alice's shoulder. "I know it's not what you really enjoy doing."

Alice narrowed her eyes at him and crossed her arms, "I don't mind doing science, Lucien, just a little consideration that I do have other things to do at the hospital than just what you want me to do. And a 'please' every now and then wouldn't go amiss either."

"I apologize. I'll do better in the future."

"You'd better, with my hands almost healed I have more access to sharp implements."

Mattie laughed at the shocked look on Lucien's face. Alice managed to keep her own straight for all of five seconds before a sly smile crept into the corners of her mouth.

" _Alice Harvey_ ," his jaw dropped. "You wound me."

"I'd like to."

" _Children_." Jean finished putting dinner on the table, "You can continue your bickering after we eat."

"We're not-!"

"My darling, it's not-!"

Alice and Lucien protested at the same time, but stopped short at the mildly cross look on Jean's face. Mattie hid her laugh in a cough at the two fully grown doctors looking like scolded schoolchildren.

"Let's eat," Lucien gestured to the food in front of them and they settled around the table to good food and even better company.

Mattie looked around at those surrounding her with a fond smile. She would miss the banter between Jean and Lucien, the rapid fire theorizing with Lucien about his cases and Alice coming up with counter-theories as she pointed out the contradicting evidence that didn't work with Lucien's thoughts. She would miss Jean's warm, welcoming presence and her filling food. She would miss this, but she knew everyone around this table was proud of her and would support her no matter what.

Now, she just had to say goodbye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uuuuuh hi, it's been 3 months, but uuuuuuh yeah life got a little hectic lmao. this story's almost done! I'm currently writing the last chapter, but have no fear, there are plenty of stories going to be told in this universe!


	9. Chapter 9

"You really don't have to do this, Alice."

"Nonsense, I want to do it," Alice smiled at Mattie as she put her suitcase next to both of Mattie's in the front hallway of Jean's house. "This way neither one of us has to travel alone."

Mattie smiled back, "I appreciate it."

"You're very welcome."

"Are you excited to see Matthew?"

Her cheeks grew warm as she nodded, "I am. You'll stop by before you leave?"

"Of course, we can go straight there once we reach the hotel in Melbourne. I have dinner with my parents tonight, then off to the port tomorrow morning, but other than that my schedule is free."

Alice reached out and grasped Mattie's elbow lightly with another smile, "Good."

Jean's heels clipped across the kitchen floor before they were muffled by the rug in the hallway, "You two ready? The taxi should nearly be here." She held a basket in her hands, filled with food for their train as well as some baked goods for Matthew that Alice was under strict instructions to take straight to him.

Mattie played with the strap of her purse as she shifted her weight from foot to foot, "I don't know, Jean."

Jean put the basket down on the hallway table and gathered Mattie up in her arms. She smoothed her hands up and down Mattie's back as Mattie clung to her like a life raft. "You, Mattie O'Brien, are an amazing woman and an amazing nurse. You were born for this job opportunity and you are going to excel at it. We are ever so proud of you… and we always will be."

Mattie sniffled, her shoulders shaking as she squeezed Jean so tight, Alice worried that Jean wouldn't be able to breathe. "I don't want to go."

"You will, Mattie, and you can. We'll always be here." Jean leaned back and cupped Mattie's face with her hands. "You can do this. It's okay if you're scared, but you have to at least try. Alice will be with you until you get on that ship, but you're the one who has to take that first step. You're going on an adventure, my girl; it's scary and the world is big, but it's also exhilarating. Have faith, Mattie."

"I do," Mattie took in a deep breath as Jean brushed away her tears. "I do, Jean. I don't want to go, but you're right. I have to try and I'm going to make you all proud."

"You already do." Jean pressed a kiss to Mattie's forehead and gave her a watery smile. "You have our number and address so you can write to your heart's content. Call when you can."

"I will."

Watching Mattie and Jean, the old familiar urge to slink away resurfaced in Alice. She longed to leave and not interfere with the heartwarming, bittersweet moment in front of her, but Alice tamped down on that little voice in her head that repeated her fears and insecurities around people.

Alice stood to the side, watching all of this with a faintly aching heart. She wondered what her life would have been like if her own mother was like Jean. Her own flight from home could have been prevented if that was the case, but Alice's mother was nothing like Jean. She'd stayed with a brute of a man who laid his hands on her and his own children. Perhaps if  _he_  hadn't been in the picture or if  _he_  was a different man completely, Alice might have had a different path in life.

Her father wasn't different though, nor had he been absent in her formative years. Alice had endured one too many beating at his hands, fought back, and then ran while she had the chance. Hopping first a bus, then a train from Sydney to Melbourne, Alice never once returned to her childhood home. Alice ran and never looked back.

An older woman - more like an aunt than a mother to Alice - brought her in off the streets of Melbourne and put her up in the boarding house she ran near the Collingwood slums. Mrs. Temperance Buchanan was a tough old bird, running her boarding house like clockwork on top of making sure Alice kept up with her studies.

"Aunt" Temperance had been stern, prickly, and somewhat aloof towards her young ward, but Alice learned more from her about the world than she did in school. With the ever revolving door of people coming in and out of the boarding house - some nice, some… not - Alice learned to put up guards, the same guards that helped protect her when her classmates made fun of her shabby clothes (never dirty, just old) and her love of books, that protected her from the drunken wandering hands of some of Temperance's patrons, and pickpockets on the cracked cobblestoned and paved streets of Melbourne as she ran errands.

It wasn't a family, and Temperance was not her new mother; it was a safe enough place to stay, to eat, to sleep in, and a place where she had someone push her to do better, to  _be_  better. The same way Jean and Lucien had done with Mattie. Jean was not Mattie's mother, but she felt like it to Alice and it reminded her a little of her own relationship with Temperance. With Temperance's stern guidance and words, Alice pushed herself in her studies, fighting to the top of her class and earning herself a scholarship to university where she'd study medicine and pathology under her mentor.

(Alice wondered if her mentor still taught in Melbourne and if Temperance was still kicking around in Collingwood. Idly, she made a note to check.)

"Alice," Jean's voice startled her out of her reminiscing and ruminations. "Thank you for going with Mattie to Melbourne. It makes me feel better."

Mattie was busy with the taxi driver at the door, who'd finally arrived. Alice smiled at Jean, "I'm just glad the end of the case coincided with it." They watched the taxi driver load their cases in to his cab. "Besides, I'm happy to help."

" _Jean_?" Lucien's voice rang into the house hesitantly, confused by all the activity.

Alice saw Mattie take a deep breath and square her shoulders before she stepped out of the house. She and Jean shared a knowing look before they followed Mattie out onto the front porch.

"They're mine, Lucien… well, all of them but one, that's Alice's." Mattie approached Lucien, playing with her purse strap again as she walked, "There… I never found the right moment to tell you, and now I'm going."

"You're leaving Ballarat?"

Mattie nodded, "For work, for an amazing job."

"Mattie, that's wonderful news!" Lucien approached his ward with a beaming smile. "And of course, Melbourne's only a train ride away."

"It's… it's in London, Lucien."

"London?" the smile slipped from Lucien's face.

"Yes, at St. Bart's," Mattie nodded again, biting her lower lip. "You… you always spoke so highly of it and I've dreamt of working there. Lucien… I want this."

A fond, bittersweet smile crossed Lucien's face as he pulled Mattie in for a hug, "They'll be lucky to have you, Mattie."

"I don't want to go," Mattie's voice, muffled by Lucien's suit jacket, grew higher in pitch and softer. "I don't want to leave Ballarat or you or Jean or anyone, but we have to follow our hearts… don't we?"

"We do," Lucien held her tight as she shook in his arms. "That we do, Mattie. We're all ever so proud of you, and always will be. You'll go so far and we'll always be here should you choose to return."

Jean gently touched Alice's elbow, prompting the pathologist to look at her. "You'll take care of her as long as you can, Alice?" Jean asked quietly.

Alice nodded, briefly glancing back at Mattie and Lucien to catch her friend pressing a kiss to the side of Mattie's head. "I will. She's having dinner with her parents tonight, and on the ship tomorrow morning, but I'll be there to see her off."

"Good… good. Give our love to Matthew."

Alice smiled and squeezed Jean's hand, "Of course I will, and I'll pass along the baked goods. If anything unexpected comes up, you and Lucien will be the first to know."

Jean squeezed back, "Enjoy your break, you've deserved it, Alice."

"Thank you, Jean."

With a hug from Jean and a peck on the cheek from Lucien, Alice slipped into the taxi next to Mattie. Both of them waved at the Blakes as the cab pulled out of the drive to the train station.

Mattie sat back against the red upholstered seat with a shaky sigh, "I think that might have been the hardest thing I've had to do in my entire life."

"You've taken a big step," Alice nodded. Leaving had never been hard for Alice; it was just another thing she'd gotten used to in her life. It was different now; now she had friends and loved ones that Alice didn't want to pull away from, and so she had a better understanding of what Mattie was experiencing as they drove the short distance to the train station.

Neither of them spoke much as they switched from the cab to the train, Alice tipped the cab driver while Mattie found their cabin and made sure their luggage was loaded. They boarded as the train whistled one last time and pulled away from Ballarat. Alice caught Mattie staring out the window with a longing gaze, her bright blue eyes drinking every last detail she could of her home as the train picked up speed. Tearing her eyes away from Mattie's face, Alice pulled out the bit of practice sewing Jean gave her, slowly going over the stitches Mrs. Blake had taught her during the week.

"Was it like this for you, Alice?" Mattie's quiet question made her pause mid-stitch. "When you left home for the first time, I mean."

Alice put her sewing down in her lap and chewed on her inner lip as she mused over Mattie's question.

"No," she finally answered. "No, not really. I didn't have that great of a childhood and ran away when I was twelve. It wasn't at all like what you're going through now."

"You ran when you were twelve years old?" Mattie's eyebrows rose, her face a mixture of sadness and surprise, but Alice didn't see pity (she was glad, pity made her defensive).

Alice nodded, "I ran from Sydney to Melbourne and a woman took me in. We weren't… exactly close, but it was a safe place to stay. When I left for university, she helped, but it wasn't like you and the Blakes."

"Not even when you were done with university?"

"No, Temperance was… a private woman, not good at showing emotions." Alice smiled at Mattie's nod. "I guess I picked that up from her. She was proud of me though, I knew that much."

"And now? If you had to leave Ballarat, what would it be like?"

"Closer to what you're feeling, I think," Alice shrugged. "I wouldn't be able to just slip away unnoticed like I had in the past. I'm fairly certain Jean  _and_  Lucien would track me down to scold me."

Mattie laughed, "I can see them doing that."

Alice smiled. "It's… a nice feeling, knowing I have a place."

Mattie nodded, "I'm glad you do, Alice."

"Me too."

* * *

Matthew looked up from his newspaper at the knock on his door frame. "Miss O'Brien?"

Mattie smiled, "Good afternoon, Chief Superintendent. May I come in?"

"Of course, of course," he put the newspaper to the side and gestured to the chair by his bed with a smile. "What brings you to Melbourne?"

"I have a job offer," Mattie dragged the chair closer as she sat in it. "One in London… My ship leaves tomorrow."

That had his eyebrows rising towards his hairline; another of the Blake 'children' was flying from the nest, first Parks and now Mattie. "Where in London?"

"St. Bart's. Lucien spoke highly of it and… it's a dream of mine to work there."

Matthew smiled, "You'll do great. Do your parents know?"

She nodded, "They do. Mum isn't too happy about it, but Dad understands, I think. I didn't want to leave Ballarat, but I couldn't pass it up."

"It's good to go out and see the world."

"That's what Alice kept telling me," Mattie smiled when he perked up at the pathologist's name. "She's here, by the way. She got waylaid at the nurse's station by an old colleague." She leaned forward as though bestowing a secret to him, "I think she's getting a medical update on your condition, though."

Matthew chuckled, "I'd prefer her getting it than Lucien, honestly. Alice doesn't hover."

"I'm glad you two have each other."

"I am too," He smiled.

"What's it like?" The question came out of left field, catching Mattie just as off guard as Matthew judging by the furious blush on her cheeks. "I mean… you don't have to answer it if you don't want to."

Matthew smiled fondly, "It's alright. You're asking what it's like to…?"

"To know who your soulmate is."

"It's… interesting," Matthew settled back on the pillows propping him up in bed. "Alice and I had been drawn to each other before we found out. I knew I had feelings for her long before my accident, it… it made it hard to want to wait for my soulmate. My feelings for them warred with those I had for Alice."

"Did you hope it was her?"

"I did. There were many times I just wanted to up and leave, go seek her out, but I had other responsibilities."

"What's it like now that you know?"

He sighed, "It's hard to explain."

"You don't have to tell me, Superintendent."

"Matthew; and I don't mind," Matthew smiled. "There's… a feeling in my chest, one that pulled or nudged me whenever I needed it. It feels like a warmth, like when you take a mouthful of hot soup on a cold day."

"Did the feeling pull you to Alice?"

"In her general direction, yeah."

"Do you feel it all the time?"

"Like am I aware of where Alice is at all times?"

"Yes."

Matthew shook his head as he shifted on the bed, "Nah, it's not like a… radar or anything like that. It's just like a sort of nudge to point you in the right direction. It comes and goes a lot."

"That's what Alice said," Mattie ducked her head a bit at his curious expression. "I, uh… mine is pulling me to London. I am going primarily for the job in London; I've always wanted it."

"I'm not doubting you, Miss O'Brien-"

"Mattie, please," she interrupted him.

"Mattie. I'm not doubting your reasons of going to London. The marking is… a private thing that you choose to share with other people. You'll do great in London and if you happen to also find your soulmate, that's wonderful. Is that why you're asking all these questions?"

She nodded, "I… I never felt like I could talk to anyone about it, at least besides you and Alice. I wanted to ask Jean, but I know she's been through a lot with Lucien and I didn't want to bring up bad memories. I knew you and Alice would be honest about it; I just hope I haven't overstepped any boundaries."

He reached out and squeezed her shoulder, "You haven't, Mattie. I can't speak for Alice just yet, but I know that if you'd pried too deep both of us would let you know. Don't worry about asking questions. I asked Lucien plenty of them after he came back to Ballarat."

"You did?"

"Yeah, he was the only one I knew well enough who'd gone through it all with the marking and wouldn't mind the questions."

"And I asked Jean about it too," Alice's voice from the doorway startled both of them. She smiled as she walked in, setting the basket down on the tray table at his feet. Shrugging off her jacket, she hung it by the door, "Curiosity is never a bad thing."

"Unless it gets you into trouble," Matthew countered with a pointed glance.

"Lucien's the one who causes trouble, not me, Matthew."

"Mm-hm," he shifted on the bed again, "I'm sure he's the sole troublemaker in the Ballarat County morgue."

Mattie laughed as Alice's cheeks flushed.

"Lucien has a charming personality that draws people in on his antics. I heard plenty stories of you and him at school. Also something about digging up a grave in the middle of the night?"

Matthew flushed, but he teased right back, "You're telling me that the formidable Doctor Alice Harvey is susceptible to Lucien Blake's charm?"

Alice swatted lightly at his good foot and he laughed. She rolled her eyes even as a fond smile crossed her face, "Alright… I will admit it's fun to stir the pot, so to speak."

Mattie stood from the chair, "I should get going, let the two of you catch up." She waved away both of their protests with a smile, "I have a few friends here I'd like to say goodbye to before dinner with my parents. It was good to see you again, Matthew."

"You too, Mattie," he grasped her hand. "Enjoy London."

"I will."

Alice walked Mattie to the door of Matthew's room, "I'll see you later tonight, Mattie."

"I'll try not to be too loud if I come in late," Mattie smiled.

"It's alright, just remember that we have an early start tomorrow."

Mattie smiled again and waved to Matthew as she left the doorway. Alice watched Mattie walk down the hallway until the young nurse disappeared from view.

"Worried about her?" Matthew asked, watching her lean against the doorway with a fond look. People definitely were wrong about Alice; she cared immensely for those she chose to love, he saw it even if the rest of the world did not.

"A little," Alice admitted. She walked back over to his bed, smiling when he offered his hand. She took it, sighing contentedly as his roughened palm warmed her fingers. "Mattie reminds me of my sister."

He gently pulled on her hand until she sat down on the bed next to his hip. "I didn't know you had a sister, Alice."

"I didn't know  _you_  had a sister - and a niece for that matter - either."

"Touche," Matthew kissed her knuckles, a faint flush crossing both their faces. He gently rubbed her knuckles with his thumb as both of them simply basked in each others' presence.

She looked tired, the circles under her eyes a little more pronounced than he'd seen before, the lines around her mouth a little deeper, but she smiled down at their joined hands and her shoulders relaxed. Her curls were tamed with pins and the skirt of her striped dress ( _he'd never seen it before, was it new?_ ) flared out around her knees and the edge of his bed.

"You… you look lovely," Matthew noted with a soft voice.

Alice's cheeks turned bright red and she ducked her head with a smile. "Thank you, Matthew… I'm not used to being lovely, or used to being considered pretty."

"Well you are, pretty, I mean."

She leaned in and pressed a kiss to his cheek, "Thank you. You're looking much better, Matthew."

"Thank you, sweetheart."

With her free hand, Alice ran her fingertips lightly down the side of his face - tracing the line of his cheek and jaw, learning the crow's feet at the corner of his eye and the lines around his mouth. Matthew smiled when she leaned in again for a soft kiss; his hand came up to cup her cheek as Alice hummed into the kiss.

"Hi," he whispered when they separated.

"Hi," she whispered back with a smile and a pretty pink blush on her cheeks.

"I'm glad you were able to visit."

"Bored already?" Alice grinned.

Matthew laughed, "I'm used to being a little more active than this."

"You'll get there again, Matthew."

"Not soon enough."

She caressed his jaw and kissed him again, "Would it help that I brought a bit of Ballarat with me?"

"Is that what's in the basket?"

Alice nodded and reached for the basket without getting up from her spot on his bed. Her prize in hand (and Matthew's hand on her knee), Alice pulled back the cloth covering the baked goods inside - an assortment of Matthew's favorites with some shortbread for Alice nestled next to them.

"Jean thought you would like some… familiarity," Alice explained as he took in all the food in the basket.

Warmth filled him at the sentiment behind the food; Jean Blake was a wonderful friend to have. "Did you help make these?"

She smiled and shrugged one shoulder, "I did. Only after work was done, though. I didn't help as much as I wanted."

Matthew leaned in and kissed her, "I love it, Alice. Thank you."

Alice hummed and replaced the basket on the table. Her eyes watched him softly as he settled back on the pillows propped up behind him. She slipped her fingers in between his on her knee, her thumb lightly rubbing the back of his while a comfortable silence settled over both of them.

He'd missed this - the quiet between them. The hospital was quiet in its own way, especially at night, but Matthew felt restless in here. He missed companionship; he missed home. Hell, he even missed Lucien hovering around his hospital room. The familiar presence of Alice helped to ease the longing Matthew had to be back in Ballarat. Her cool fingers laced in his anchored him and soothed the restlessness in his mind all without needing to say much.

A light tug on his fingers brought him out of his thoughts and Matthew looked up to see Alice's smile.

"Penny for your thoughts?" She asked.

"Just glad that you're here, sweetheart."

Alice's smile widened and she leaned in to kiss him again, resting her forehead against his after. Matthew lightly nuzzled his nose against hers, grinning at her quiet giggle. He liked seeing this side of Alice; the easy affection, the softness that she hid, and he liked that she felt comfortable and confident enough to show it to him. Her lips brushed his once more and for a minute the kiss swept away all his doubts and darker thoughts. She was more than enough.

"I'm glad I'm here too." Her smile returned. "I missed you, Matthew. Ballarat's just not the same without its grumpy Chief Superintendent." She untangled her fingers from his and they brushed his jawline, briefly sneaking up to trace the lines around his mouth. Her thumb grazed his lips and he pressed a kiss to the pad, smiling when Alice blushed.

"I'll just have to be extra grumpy while you're in town to hold you over until your next visit." Matthew grinned at Alice's giggles - which she desperately tried to muffle behind her other hand. "I'm serious, I'll be as grumpy as you want, Alice."

"You can be as grumpy as  _you_  want," she pressed a kiss to his cheek, right next to one of his dimples. "I'll be here, as long as you want me."

Matthew traced the line of her cheekbone with the back of his fingers so lightly, he could barely feel the warmth of her skin. Her tone was light, bordering on teasing, but Matthew knew her well enough to know that Alice was serious. She said she would be here, and he knew she'd hold to that promise as long as both of them wanted.

"Shall I have the staff bring your suitcase from the hotel then? Since you're staying here with me for forever?"

Alice laughed, bright and clear, her cheeks a warm pink. "I think we might raise a few eyebrows doing that, Matthew."

"It'd be fun."

"It would be," she giggled. "You're a terrible influence."

He leaned forward and kissed her cheek, "Only with you, sweetheart." Alice leaned into the kiss, humming lightly when he pressed another to her temple. Matthew breathed in the light floral scent and hospital antiseptic that created a unique perfume to the woman before him; she smelled of home and he hoped he would never tire of it.

Pressing another kiss to her temple, Matthew smiled, "I'm glad you're here."

"Me too," she quietly replied.

"Stay, please?"

"Always."

* * *

Alice looked over at her companion with a concerned look. Mattie, normally cheery and outgoing, was unnaturally quiet. They woke early, the sky still brightening on the horizon as they both made sure Mattie had everything packed and ready to be taken to the port. Alice kept her busy, listening to Mattie talk about anything and everything the night before and this morning, but as they descended the stairs to the lobby of the hotel, the young nurse's talk lessened. By the time they finished breakfast and were in the cab, Mattie had fallen silent and Alice worried the strap of her purse. Her normal confidence faltered at the thought of being the last familiar face Mattie saw before she left for London. It should be someone else, someone better. It should be Jean or Lucien or Mattie's own parents; not Alice, not the pathologist who was better with the dead than the living.

"Thank you, Alice." Mattie's voice startled her and she looked up to see Mattie still staring out the cab window.

"For what?"

"For coming with me, for being here even though I know you want to be at the hospital with Matthew."

"I… made a promise to you and one to Jean. I intend to keep both."

"I'm glad you're here," Mattie turned from the window and Alice noticed she was trying to keep back tears.

Alice silently held out her hand, only speaking when Mattie took it, "Are your parents coming to see you off too?"

Mattie shook her head, "No, I said my goodbyes last night at dinner, but I am glad a familiar face will be the last I see from Australia."

"How are you feeling?"

Mattie's hand tightened around hers, "Excited… nervous… a little nauseous."

Alice squeezed back, "The sea air might help once we get there."

"You'll stay?"

"Until I can't see the ship anymore, I promise."

A smile spread on Mattie's face, wavering a little as the cab approached the docks, but she took a deep breath and straightened her spine. With just a little gesture, Mattie looked so much like Jean that Alice had to smile. She would be fine in London. She'd do more than just work and survive; she would thrive with all that Lucien and Jean had taught her.

The cab slowed to a stop and they sorted out what ship Mattie will leave on and sent her luggage towards it; Alice tipped the cab driver before he left while Mattie looked up at the ship in apprehension. Alice walked up behind her, "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be," Mattie started walking down the pier with Alice by her side.

Alice briefly froze when she felt Mattie slip her arm around her elbow, but her stride didn't falter and after the initial shock, it felt nice. It made her feel included, accepted by Mattie; for once Alice felt like one of the happy young women she'd seen walking around the streets of Melbourne in her youth - arm in arm with their friends, chattering brightly like songbirds as they walked past Alice.

Mattie clung tighter to Alice's arm as they walked closer to the gangplank. Pulling off to the side, Alice stopped and looked at Mattie, "Here we are, Mattie."

"Yes," Mattie sighed, her hand tight in Alice's as she looked up at the ship.

"Mattie," Alice tugged on her hand - getting her to look over - and Alice smiled. "You're going to be fine."

Mattie sniffed, swiping at the tears falling down her cheeks, "I'm scared."

"It's okay to be scared. It's natural; this is a big step, but it's a wonderful opportunity."

Mattie nodded, the tears still falling, as she turned and wrapped her arms around Alice tightly. Alice froze; her hands faltered - hovering over Mattie's back as she considered where to put them - but at Mattie's quiet sob, she wrapped the young nurse in the circle of her arms and squeezed tight.

"I don't want to go," Mattie whispered, "but I know I have to. I have to do this, for myself if nothing else, but I don't feel ready."

"My dear girl," Alice smoothed a hand up and down Mattie's back, pulling inspiration from watching Jean and her own hugs from her and Matthew. "You are. You're ready for this; you're going on an adventure of a lifetime. We're all so proud of you."

Mattie's arms tightened around her, her fingers digging into Alice's shoulders. Alice swayed a little, her hands still soothing up and down Mattie's back as she felt her collar dampen with Mattie's tears. She looked around and watched similar situations playing out along the pier with a fond smile; they'd arrived early enough that Alice wasn't worried about the time just yet.

Idly, Alice noted that over a year ago she wouldn't have done this; she wouldn't have chosen to stay in the embrace this long, let alone have people she felt comfortable enough to touch. Over a year ago, she hadn't met Lucien yet. She hadn't been pulled into the warmth of his found family and experienced what it was like to actually have a home.

Mattie's tears slowed and her arms loosened; Alice leaned back, her hands lightly grasping Mattie's upper arms as Mattie wiped away her tears.

"All good?" Alice asked softly.

Mattie nodded, "I think so. I'm sorry for that."

"Don't be, you needed it," Alice smiled. "You're going to be brilliant, Mattie, and you're going to be fine."

"Thank you, Alice," Mattie smiled back.

Reaching into her pocket, Alice pulled out a folded bit of paper, "I know you already have the Blakes' address and number, but I wanted to give you mine as well. Please don't hesitate to write or call if you need to; I'd love to hear about London."

"May I… may I ask you any questions I have about the marking?"

"Of course. I'm no expert, but I'll answer as best I can."

Mattie took the paper and slipped it into her purse, "Thank you again, Alice. As soon as I get to London, I'll let all of you know."

She leaned forward and hugged Alice again, squeezing tightly. This time, Alice didn't hesitate to wrap her arms around her young friend. She smiled when Mattie pressed a kiss to her cheek and walked to the gangplank of the ship, her stride confident and her posture tall. Jean would be proud.

Alice watched as Mattie presented her ticket and stood at the rail as the ship's whistle blew. Waving with a grin, Mattie leaned over the rail as Alice waved back. She waved on and off as the ship pulled away from the dock, following it as far as the pier extended into the bay. Keeping her promise, Alice stayed until she could no longer see the ship, the wind teasing her curls and ruffling her coat. Slowly turning from the sea, she walked back up the pier.

Mattie would do well on her adventure and new life in London. Alice hoped she would enjoy it and wished her luck in her work and following the tether to whomever her soulmate turned out to be. Hailing a cab at the street, she made her way back to the hospital; pausing in the lobby to use the phone, Alice let Jean know that Mattie made it onto the ship and that Alice herself would be back in Ballarat in a few days. Smiling at Jean's warm voice over the phone, she assured her friend she'd call before she left Melbourne. It was nice to have a home.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> uuuuh a bit of angst ahead? Rose visits Alice to suss her out (the first of many visits!), Alice continues to visit Matthew in Melbourne as he learns how to walk again, but his doubts about making her happy surface

' _Blood on the knife matches the blood sample taken at the crime scene, but does not match the victim, suggesting that the victim possibly injured their assailant in a fight immediately prior to death_.' Alice set down her pen on the notepad and switched out the samples under the microscope. Lucien was out with Carlyle again, leaving the morgue silent apart from the light tinkling of the glass slides as she moved them.

Adjusting the focus on the microscope, Alice paused when she felt eyes on her. "You know it's rude to stare."

"I have been told that, yes," Rose Anderson answered from her spot in the doorway - leaning against the door jamb.

Alice turned around on her stool to face Matthew's niece, catching the reporter eyeing her in a way that made Alice feel like she was being examined or judged (reminding her too much of her years in school). She cleared her throat and straightened her spine, "Can I help you, Miss Anderson?"

Rose pushed up off the doorway and walked to the autopsy table, "I can't figure you out."

"Excuse me?"

"You and my uncle," Rose supplied, leaning against the stainless table. She tilted her head to one side, "I can't figure you out."

Alice sighed quietly. Her friends asking about her and Matthew was one thing, being questioned by his family was another. Lacing her fingers in her lap, Alice braced herself internally for an interrogation. "What… what would you like to know?"

"I want to know what you are to my uncle."

"Isn't that something you should ask him?"

Rose raised an eyebrow, a small smirk crossing her face at Alice's comeback. "I'm asking  _you_ , Doctor Harvey. I saw the two of you before he left for Melbourne. He's never mentioned you before and I'm curious as to why."

Alice sighed again, "Your uncle is a private person and so am I, Miss Anderson. It's all still very… new."

"What do you want from him?"

"Just him," she answered without hesitation. "I don't need any more than that."

The smirk grew into a genuine smile (or as genuine as Alice could judge) and Rose straightened from the table. "Mm, good answer. I can see why he likes you."

Alice smiled back, "I can see the similarities between the two of you."

"Funny, Mum says the same thing." Rose drifted back through the open doorway, "I'll see you around, Doctor Harvey!"

She left as quickly as she arrived and Alice shook her head slightly in confusion. Rose seemed just as much of an enigma as her uncle and Alice had a feeling this wouldn't be the last of her visits.

* * *

Matthew sighed as he leaned back against the pillows. He shifted on the bed and winced when his leg flared up in the movement. God, he was tired of this. He was tired of sitting, of being in pain, of the hospital, of all of it.

Aside from Alice's visits, everything ran together and felt dull. Time seemed to drag on and Matthew wanted out; he wanted to actually have a life instead of being cooped up in a damn hospital ward where he barely had anything to do with his time. His options were to reread the books he'd brought with him months ago or stare at the walls - neither were particularly appetizing.

"I hear you've been terrorizing my nurses," a dry voice spoke from the doorway. He looked up to see the ward doctor leaning against the door jamb.

She wore men's clothing, reminding him of Lucien with her trousers and vest - a brilliantly colored ascot tied around her neck in lieu of a tie - under her white doctor coat. Her hair had been red at some point - time turned it a stylish silver except for the ends and her eyebrows - and she pinned it up out of her face in a slightly dated style. Her blue eyes were bright and keen behind a pair of reading glasses that she took off and put in the pocket of her white coat. Looking back up at him, she raised an eyebrow.

Aside from Alice, she was the first woman doctor Matthew had met in person. (She was also the discreet doctor who'd patched up his hand the night he sent his fist into a mirror months ago). Their humor was similar - as were their attitudes; as such she was the only doctor who could talk sense into him when his mood was particularly sour.

"Not terrorizing, Doctor, simply answering their questions like I have been doing everyday since I've arrived here."

"Ah," she nodded, "answering them rudely then, and ordering them about like they were one of your constables."

He gnawed on the inside of his lip and huffed a sigh. Doctor Macmillan did not play games or pull punches.

"Get me out of here, Doc, and I'll leave them alone."

That got a slight smile out of her, "I'm afraid that's not possible, Lawson, you're going to be here for quite some time. I  _am_  happy to report that you're physically healing very nicely, but getting you back up to walking will take some time."

' _Fan-bloody-tastic_ ,' Matthew sighed and crossed his arms.

"Scowl all you want, Lawson, just be nice to the nurses," Macmillan looked at him with a raised eyebrow until he nodded. "Anything of note?"

He shrugged, "The damn leg is hurting, what else is new?"

"I'll get you a dose of painkillers, then. If it continues more than usual, let one of the nurses know immediately.  _Nicely_."

The steely look in her eyes brokered no argument - Matthew did admit he'd been particularly cross lately. He nodded to the doctor, promising that he'd at least try not to bother the staff too much.

"Good, I'll check up on you later in the week, Lawson. For now, rest and enjoy your visitor. This is usually when they come, yes?"

Matthew nodded, his mood already turning for the better at the thought of Alice arriving in Melbourne. "When she can, Doc."

"I look forward to meeting her one day."

"Maybe you will."

"Cheeky," Doctor Macmillan smiled. "Be good and stop terrorizing my nurses."

* * *

Alice nodded to the nurses as she strode down the hallway towards Matthew's room. It had been a few months since she first started visiting and by now Alice was a familiar sight at the hospital. (The nurses always appreciated her presence and the extra baked goods just for them from Alice and Jean.)

Peering around the doorway into Matthew's room, Alice smiled when she saw him fast asleep with his chin tucked into his chest and a book open haphazardly on his lap. Quietly closing the door behind her, Alice crept up to the bed and eased the book out of his hands. Pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead, she sat down on the edge of the bed as Matthew blearily opened his eyes.

"Hm?" He rubbed at his eyes, "Was I asleep?"

Alice smiled and nodded, "You must have drifted off while reading."

Matthew let out a snort of laughter, "Pretty boring book then."

"Must be." She placed the book on his bedside table and took his hand, "I could bring you different ones if you'd like?"

"I'd  _like_  to get out of this place," he frowned.

"You will, Matthew."

His frown deepened, "You're patronizing me."

"No, I'm not." Alice straightened, her own frown on her face as she drew her hand back. "What's the matter with you today?"

* * *

He was in a mood and taking it out on Alice. It wasn't fair - to her or to others - but he was just so damn  _tired_  of the prodding, the non-answers to his questions, and the endless platitudes.

"Nothing," Matthew answered sullenly.

Alice narrowed her eyes at him and they stared at each other for a few tense moments until she sighed and looked away. "Do you want me to go?"

Her voice was resigned, quieter than he'd heard it in months, and something inside him broke. A voice in his head (sounding suspiciously like Jean) chided him for being an arse to Alice. Matthew reached out and brushed his fingers against the back of her hand as he sighed, "No. No, I don't want you to go, sweetheart. I'm sorry. I'm… I'm just so damn frustrated in here."

She shifted on the bed - her hand seeking out his - but her posture remained stiff.

"I don't want you to go, Alice. Your visits feel like the only bright spots of my time here."

Alice lifted his hand and brushed a kiss to the back of it. She shifted closer and pressed a kiss to his forehead, "I don't mind you being grumpy or frustrated, Matthew. I mind when you don't tell me about it and then bite my head off when I don't know any better."

"I'm sorry."

Her lips were soft and warm as she kissed him -her fingers cool against his neck and jaw. Matthew relaxed into the kiss, the dark cloud dissipating over his head as he kissed her back, his hands settling on her waist. Alice was happy - obviously happy - when she came to visit him and she brightened his day considerably whenever she was around, but the doubts still crept into his thoughts.

At every setback, every check up where they said 'not yet' to his questions about moving around or starting physical therapy, the doubts conquered more and more of his mind during his waking moments. Matthew couldn't  _possibly_  make Alice happy, holding her back as a cripple for a soulmate. He couldn't  _possibly_  keep up with her physically or mentally so why should he be there to slow her down? She was obviously happy with her life, why should he darken it?

"Apology accepted," Alice murmured against his lips, smiling when he leaned forward and kissed her. She drew back, her thumbs smoothing over his jawline, "Has it been that bad, Matthew?"

He shrugged, "I've started physical therapy, but there's still only so much they're allowing me to do around here. I feel cooped up."

"How can I help?"

God bless her. Matthew smiled and pulled her closer, "You're helping by being here."

"I could come more often if you'd like?" Alice bit her lower lip as she thought.

Matthew gave into the urge to kiss her when she did that, his smile widening at the blush on her cheeks. "No, no, you've got your work in Ballarat and I won't take you from it."

Her thumb caressed his cheek and he swore his skin tingled. "There are a lot of things that could take me from my work, Matthew; you're not one of them."

"Good."

* * *

Alice smiled and ran her fingers through his hair, mussing up the combed style. She laughed when he pulled her hand away from his head and kissed the back of her fingers. "By the way, Rose has come to see me."

"Really?"

She leaned in and kissed the crease between his eyebrows, "Yes, really. I think she was sussing me out like you do with one of your suspects. She wanted to know what I was to you."

"She's too curious for her own good sometimes."

"Sometimes? Or just when her curiosity is turned on you?"

Matthew made a low non-commital noise in the back of his throat and simply kissed the back of her fingers again. "What did you say to her?"

"I told her that she'd have to ask you what I am to you," Alice smiled at his short bark of a laugh. "Then she asked me what I wanted with you."

"And?"

She pressed a kiss to his mouth, savoring his sigh, before leaning back. "You. Just you. That's all I want."

Matthew kissed her deeply and she shivered when his teeth nipped at her lower lip; his tongue soothing the slight sting as she hummed into the kiss. He drew back briefly before kissing her again and resting his forehead against hers, "You're all I want too, sweetheart."

* * *

She walked into the hospital, the path to Matthew's ward was second nature by now. It had been a few weeks since she was able to visit, work in Ballarat piled up on top of cases with Lucien took more of her personal time than usual. Weekly tea with Jean - that often ended with her staying for dinner at the Blakes - continued to give Alice a bit of respite in her work and kept her calm when she felt pain flare up around her knee (physical therapy seemed to be continuing on schedule for Matthew).

As she drew closer to the nurse's station - armed with a few baked goods for them - Alice felt the exhaustion in her bones lift slightly with every step. Work had been a lot lately, but she liked the nurses here at Matthew's hospital; they were passionate about their work and cared for their patients in a way that she'd only seen with Mattie. Their compassion eased Alice's worry over Matthew while she was separated from him; he was in good hands.

"Morning, Doctor Harvey!" One of the nurses called from behind the desk. "It's been awhile since we've seen you here."

Alice nodded, "Work unfortunately kept me away. I come bearing gifts though." She held up the basket and smiled when the nurses started crowding around for a peek. "Shortbread and coffee cake courtesy of Mrs. Blake."

"And you, Doctor Harvey," the first nurse ( _Ariel, her name was Ariel_ , Alice remembered). "Mr. Lawson tells us that you've been baking with Mrs. Blake and your outcomes are absolutely delicious."

She ducked her head with a smile, feeling her cheeks grow warm at the compliment as the other nurses accepted the wrapped packages with glee. When most of them left, Alice turned to Ariel, "How is he today, really?"

The smile on Ariel's face faltered a bit and she sighed, "He's… in a mood. Therapy took a lot out of him, but it also riled him up a bit. We've had to tread lightly around him for the past few days."

Alice frowned, "He's not supposed to be like that to you girls."

"We know," Ariel nodded, "but we also can't fault him for the outbursts. Recovery from an injury like his takes time and would try the patience of a saint. He has been making a lot of progress and very willing to get better, but everyone has their limits. Mr. Lawson might perk up now that you're here though."

"Still, I'll remind Matthew to not take it out on you," Alice reached out instinctively to pat Ariel's hand like she would with Mattie or Jean, but pulled her hand back at the last second. Ariel smiled at the gesture and Alice smiled back, "Enjoy the cake. I'll pick up the basket on my way out."

"No baked goods for Mr. Lawson this time?"

"No, he said last visit that he had enough to last him a while."

"Have a good visit then," Ariel smiled and waved as Alice made her way down the ward towards Matthew's room. The ward itself felt quiet that day, not many visitors aside from the usual hospital personnel going from room to room. No students touring today either, Alice noted as she approached Matthew's door.

She paused and took a deep breath in before she knocked lightly on the door, "Matthew?"

A grunt was her only answer and Alice pushed it open. She stopped in her tracks at the sight of Matthew attempting to get out of bed. Her right leg ached a little as he gingerly swung his legs out of the sheets and rested his feet on the floor. Matthew had certainly made progress since the last time she was in Melbourne, but Alice wasn't sure if he should be on his feet so soon after a therapy session. He stood, leaning heavily on the end of his bed and the wall, and took a limping step forward. Pain flashed across Matthew's face and Alice felt the sharp echo of it lance through her own leg.

"Matthew?" She moved towards him when he faltered. Her hands reached out to support him, but Matthew pushed them away with a grimace.

"Don't need help," he huffed and leaned against the wall more, trying to take the weight off his bad leg.

"Yes, you do," Alice snapped. "Should you be up so soon?"

"Forgive me for wanting to get out of bed on my own for once!"

Alice stepped back and crossed her arms with a frown as Matthew sat back down heavily on the bed. "I know you're feeling trapped, Matthew, but you have to rest your leg after therapy sessions. Your body is trying to tell you to ease up on moving around with all this pain."

"I'm tired of resting and I'm tired of being told that I have to do that."

"Healing is a long process, Matthew."

" _I know that_ ," he snapped.

"If you know that, why exacerbate your leg and everyone around you trying to help?"

"Maybe I'm tired of the help, of all the prodding and babying, Alice, have you thought of that?"

"That's still no excuse to take it out on the nurses, they're doing their jobs like they're supposed to, even if you're being temperamental."

"They were getting on my nerves."

"They're here to help you get better. A broken femur is not something that heals instantly."

Matthew balled his hands into fists on his knees, "Lucien should have just taken the damn leg while I was on that table! I could have dealt with a false leg rather than this mangled mess! I don't even know why you keep coming back here, Alice, it's not worth your time."

"Stop it!" Alice uncrossed her arms as she reached over and turned Matthew's hand over to reveal the scars on his palms that matched hers, "Stop beating yourself up, Matthew;  _this_  is why I keep coming back.  _You_  are why I keep coming back."

Matthew snatched his hand back with a glare, not accepting her reasoning, "You never really believed in the marking anyways, so why are you even  _here_ , Doctor Harvey?"

"I'm here because I love you, Matthew!"

Alice snapped her mouth shut, her ears rang with her own words and the sudden silence echoed between the two of them as they both processed what she said.

"I can see that I've overstayed my welcome and I'm not wanted anymore." Alice's voice was edged with an anger that she wasn't sure if it was directed at Matthew or herself. She swallowed hard, trying to hold back her tears as she turned away from the speechless man on the bed. "I'll go, and leave you alone, Matthew."

Alice nearly flinched at the wavering in her voice and the burning path of the tears on her cheeks. Leaving him there was the hardest thing she'd have to do, but if they were just going to yell at each other and argue, it was for the best.

Even if she could feel her heart breaking with each step.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> honestly this was one of the chapters I was most looking forward to after reaching chapter 7, I'm always up for a crossover and so having some Miss Fisher's mixed into this whole story is definitely fun! Enjoy!

The train swayed and rocked her gently as Jean watched the countryside pass by her window; the rolling hills and patches of trees that peppered the growing crops blurred together before her eyes. Normally, Jean loved seeing the snatches of rural life outside the train - reminding her of the better years on her farm - but the shining sunlight contrasted sharply with Jean's whirling thoughts.

It started with a phone call from Alice.

* * *

" _Blake residence," Jean picked up the phone with a smile. When the person on the other end didn't speak, the smile slid into a slight frown, "Hello?"_

_She heard a shuddering breath and then Alice's voice, "Jean."_

_Jean hadn't heard Alice this quiet since Munro dragged her through the coals during the Orton case._

" _Alice! Everything alright?"_

" _Everything's fine." It didn't sound fine to Jean; Alice sounded like she'd been crying and close to tears even now. "I wanted to let Lucien know that I'm taking the week... I ran into my old mentor and she needs some help here in Melbourne."_

" _I'll certainly let Lucien know, Alice. Are you sure everything's alright?"_

_Silence echoed down the line and the longer it went on, the more Jean worried that she'd overstepped the unseen line they'd both drawn in the sand months ago. They'd become close since the Orton case, but there were still things about each other that neither knew._

_At last, Alice sighed heavily, "No. No, everything's not alright, Jean… Matthew… Matthew and I fought and I don't know how to fix it."_

" _So you want to take some time to cool off before you try?"_

 _Alice made a noise on the other end that sounded like she agreed._ " _I don't want to leave it like this, Jean, but I just… I don't know," she sounded frustrated over the phone and Jean sympathized with her. It seemed both her and Matthew were hurting and Jean felt for them; they didn't deserve heartache, but their stubborn personalities were bound to clash eventually. Maybe a surprise trip to Melbourne to soothe ruffled feathers was in order._

" _I'll let Lucien know you're taking time off, Alice; you take a long as you need."_

_Alice sighed again, and Jean could hear the tears in her voice, "Thank you, Jean." Her voice was soft again, but lighter than before._

" _You're very welcome, Alice. Now, what hospital does your mentor work at and what's a good number to reach you at?"_

* * *

Convincing Lucien to stay behind while she traveled to Melbourne had taken some time, but Jean won that particular debate in the end. For practicality purposes, Lucien couldn't leave Ballarat when Alice was gone. He still had his surgery to run and police surgeon duties to perform; he couldn't just up and leave. Jean also knew that Lucien cared deeply for both of his friends - he was just as excited about the two of them coming together as Alice and Matthew were - but he could be… overzealous in his want to help. She wanted to help her friends and come out with the least amount of trodden upon toes as possible.

So, here she was, on a train to Melbourne by herself and she didn't know if her plan to help Alice and Matthew through this would even work. She had to try though.

She had to.

* * *

Alice walked around the autopsy table, her eyes fixed on the body before her. She let out a slow, drawn-out breath, hoping to ease the beginnings of the headache throbbing behind her eyes; this morgue was more brightly lit than her own in back Ballarat and Alice found herself squinting more in the white-walled room.

"Ready, Doctor Harvey?"

Alice looked up to see her mentor smiling across the table, scalpel in hand. "Of course, Doctor Macmillan."

It had been a bit of a shock to see her after all these years; running into her on one of the worst possible days of the past few years of Alice's life had been a blessing.

* * *

_Alice rounded the corner, angrily swiping at the tears that spilled down her cheeks. Her body was hot, her hands shook, and heartbeat roared in her ears; anger fueled her fast pace down the hospital corridors - increasing the distance between her and Matthew. A lead weight in her heart grew with each step and kept the tears flowing._

_Her shoulder clipped someone else's and she barely managed a strangled "sorry" before a sob escaped her throat. Screwing her eyes shut, Alice covered her mouth with a shaking hand to stem the pressure building in her chest. It wasn't fair; life wasn't being fair for Matthew or for her. She'd fought with people before - hell she'd fought with her own father many times by the time she left at twelve - but none of those fights hurt as much as this one did._

_Hands, warm and soothing, gently wrapped around her upper arms to steer her out of the hallway and away from prying eyes. They eased her down into a chair before they disappeared momentarily and Alice dimly heard a door closing over the sounds of her own sobs._

" _That's it, let it out," a soft voice - familiar in its cadence and warmth - soothed Alice as she cried. A warm hand smoothed circles into her eyes upper back. "Let it all out and then we'll talk, alright?"_

" _I-" She tried to get the words out, but her throat constricted with her tears._

" _Shh… let's cry it out and then we'll talk, Alice."_

_The hand on her back remained as Alice cried for what felt like hours. The anger at herself, at Matthew, at everything mixed with her exhaustion from work and the rising tensions in Ballarat as Derek Alderton returned and set the Blakes on edge. Everything that she'd held back while visiting Matthew as she put on a brave face poured out of her until both her eyes and throat were raw and burning, and the beginnings of a headache started to pound in her head._

" _Better?" the voice asked and Alice looked up finally to see her old mentor seated beside her. Doctor Elizabeth Macmillan hadn't changed all that much over the years; her hair held less red and more gray, her face was more worn and wrinkled, but her eyes were just as sharp as they had been when Alice went to university._

"... _Mac?" she asked in quiet disbelief._

" _It's good to see you, Alice," Mac smiled and wiped a few of the remaining tears off Alice's shocked face. "Though, I wish it were in better circumstances… what brings you here to Melbourne?"_

_Alice sighed and looked down at her hands, huffing a silent laugh when Mac pressed a handkerchief into them. "Visiting a… a friend. We… he and I fought."_

" _A 'friend', hm?_ _What about?"_

" _Everything… and nothing," Alice shrugged. "I don't know, Mac, I just… I-" The tears started again, spilling over her cheeks as she buried her head in her hands. "I'm a doctor, Mac… but I don't know how to fix this."_

_Her voice felt ragged and hoarse, cracking as she turned to her mentor. "How do I fix this, Mac?"_

_Mac smoothed a hand over Alice's back, the distraught on her face mirroring Alice's. "I don't know, Alice. Maybe some time apart from each other will help… Have you got a place to stay?"_

" _A hotel, but I'm due back at work soon… Mac, I don't want to leave it like this. I love Matthew, but I don't know how we'll move forward if we just keep fighting or trading barbs with each other each time we speak lately."_

" _Time, Alice, time is what both of you need right now. Let the waters settle between the two of you as you both reflect on it and then come back when you've both cooled off."_

" _But what about work?"_

" _See if you can get time off, I'll keep you busy here in the morgue," Mac smiled. "And you'll be staying at my place for the duration - no negotiations," she added when Alice opened her mouth to protest. "You don't want to leave Melbourne and this is a good option for you. You'll be here at the morgue with me, doing something you love to do, and when you feel the time is right you can go and speak to Matthew."_

_Alice smiled softly, "You make it sound so easy."_

" _Nothing in life is terribly easy… I've told you that many times over the years while you were here, Alice." Mac smiled back, "Sometimes the things in life that are good for us or the things we really want are hard to get, they require work and time put into them… that's what makes it all so worthwhile in the end."_

" _Thank you… for listening."_

_Her old mentor smiled, "I'm always here for you, Alice, I hope you know that. Now, let's tidy you up, call whoever you need to call about work, and then we'll go for some tea. Sweet tea will surely make you feel better."_

* * *

"Doctor Harvey?"

"Hm?" Alice blinked and felt her cheeks flush with embarrassment at Mac waiting with a curious look. "My apologies, Dr. Macmillan, please continue."

"Head up in the clouds today, Alice?" Mac asked as she cut open the body before them.

"Maybe," she answered while jotting down notes.

They'd settled into a routine since running into each other a few days ago in the hospital. It wasn't as seamless as hers and Lucien's usual exchange of information and duties in Ballarat, but it still brought a comfort to Alice as they worked. Compared to Lucien's conjecture - the theories somewhat outlandish in their nature at times - Mac's theories remained firmly rooted in whatever physical evidence the body provided. Alice actually found herself offering up the wilder theories out of the two of them, catching Mac's amused expressions whenever she did, but Alice didn't stop making them.

" _What kind of cases are you running into down in Ballarat?" Mac asked one day after Alice supplied the caliber of gun used on a body before Mac had a chance to find the bullet._

_Alice shrugged, adopting Lucien's all-too-innocent look as she tilted her head and answered, "No different than the cases you run into up here in Melbourne."_

" _You've adopted a lovely imagination since we last worked together, Dr. Harvey," Mac grinned._

" _Not imagination," Alice grinned back, "simply a more open mind."_

" _One of these days, I'd like to meet your colleague in Ballarat."_

" _Maybe one day you will."_

"Mac!" The enthusiastic shout of her mentor's nickname and the slap of a hand on the morgue door to push it open was the only warning they received prior to their visitor. The Honourable Miss Phryne Fisher descended upon their silent workspace like a typhoon.

A well-dressed, French perfume wearing typhoon.

Phryne quirked a smile at her old friend and practically beamed when she spotted Alice, "Ah, Al! You're still here as well, good! Have any new theories that you have cooked up in that lovely brain of yours?"

"Phryne," Mac chided her with an exasperated look, "we've barely finished the autopsy, could we gather our findings  _before_  you come in demanding answers?"

"Where's the fun in that?" Phryne batted her eyelashes at Mac, her dark red lips sticking out in a pout.

Alice smiled down at her clipboard; Miss Fisher hadn't changed a bit either.

She watched the two bicker over the body and the case while she finished her and Mac's notes. A knock at the door paused Mac and Phryne's friendly argument; Phryne was closest and so opened it. "Can I help you?"

"I'm looking for Doctor Harvey."

Alice's head snapped up at the familiar sound of Jean's voice. Her friend stood in the doorway of the morgue - purse clutched in both hands, but a warm smile on her face. "Jean?"

"Hello, Alice," Jean's smile widened. "Is this a bad time?"

"Not at all," Phryne answered for her and stuck out her hand for Jean to shake. "Phryne Fisher, Lady Detective. How do you know our Al?"

"Jean Blake," she shook the offered hand. "I'm a friend of Alice's from Ballarat, she works with my husband in the hospital morgue. We've become close since she's arrived in our town."

"That's good to hear," Mac spoke up from next to Alice. "I'm Doctor Elizabeth Macmillan."

"The mentor?"

Mac looked over at her former student with a raised eyebrow, smiling at the embarrassed flush spreading across Alice's cheeks. "I didn't know I had such a reputation, Alice."

Alice just blushed harder.

"Mac, don't tease Al," Phryne narrowed her eyes at her old friend. "It's good she has friends."

"I'm still here, you know," Alice finally spoke up since Jean walked into the morgue. "What do you need, Jean?"

She looked over to see Jean hiding a smile behind her hand, evidently amused at the friendly banter being tossed around the room. Her friend cleared her throat, but the smile remained, "I came to talk to you, Alice."

"Go ahead, Alice, we're done here for now," Mac gently took the clipboard from Alice's hands. "My office is open, take as much time as you two need."

"Thank you, Mac," Alice smiled when Mac gently squeezed her shoulder. She led Jean out of the morgue and into Mac's office. "Not that I'm unhappy to see you, Jean, but why are you here?"

Jean bit down on her lower lip, "I… I wanted to help. I don't want to overstep boundaries, Alice, but I thought… that maybe with a… "

"A mediator?"

"Of a sorts," Jean lifted one corner of her mouth in a half smile. "I figured Matthew might also need a bit of a kick in the arse."

Alice let out a short laugh, "He's stubborn enough to need one."

"Both of you are," Jean raised an eyebrow, pursing her lips to hide her smile at Alice's blush. "I just wanted to see how you were before I went and talked to him."

She chewed on her inner lip - a habit she picked up from Matthew and she stopped as soon as that thought crossed her mind. Nodding, Alice smiled, "I'm fine, Jean, really."

"Really?"

Alice gave her a half-hearted shrug, "I… the past few days have given me some time to think. I don't want to leave what's between us like it is, but…"

Jean reached out and before she could rest her hand on Alice's forearm, Alice met her halfway and grasped Jean's hand in her own. Noting how hard Alice gripped her hand, Jean's face fell, "You're also not sure how to approach him?"

Alice nodded, "Both of us were exhausted, Jean, we said things that… otherwise might not have been said."

Jean said nothing, simply squeezed Alice's hand. Alice felt her lower lip tremble, but the familiar warmth of Jean's presence soothing her frayed nerves. Meeting back up with Mac and Phryne had been a welcome reprieve, but neither of them were Jean. Jean was her lifeline in dealing with the marking and had been there every step of the dance between her and Matthew; Mac only knew the little Alice told her.

"What happened, Alice?"

Her eyes burned and her vision blurred with tears, but Alice held them back (she'd thought she was out of tears - her heart thought otherwise). "We fought. He was trying to walk unaided on his own too soon after a therapy appointment; I was tired from work and Alderton showing up again and so I snapped at him and it went downhill from there."

"Oh, Alice…" Jean pulled on Alice's hand and gently wrapped her arms around the taller pathologist. Alice practically melted into her embrace - her hands clutching at Jean's back as Jean soothed her. "I'm so sorry."

"I told him I loved him." Alice's remark - almost too quiet to be heard - briefly stilled Jean's hands smoothing up and down Alice's back.

"How did he react?"

"I don't know, really... I left right after I said it... Was it ever like this for you and Lucien?" Alice asked quietly into her shoulder.

Jean hummed a small chuckle, "Oh yes. We actually fought right after finding out we were each other's' soulmates. He'd figured it out months before I did and… I was not happy."

"What happened?"

"He came after me, he apologized… there might have been some crying on both our parts." Jean smiled when Alice let out a watery laugh, "and we both let out our doubts and fears. We cleared the air, Alice; we talked about everything and anything that night. Lucien is mine in a way that he is no one else's, much like Matthew is yours."

"So…" Alice drew back from the hug with a sigh, "you're saying to just talk it out with him?"

"After I've softened him up for you a bit," Jean smiled with a wink, her smile growing larger when Alice laughed. "You don't have to do it right now, Alice. I can stop by later after I've had a chat with him if you'd like?"

"I'd appreciate that, Jean… thank you," Alice smiled. "Depending on what time you're done, maybe tea or dinner?"

Jean smiled back, "That sounds lovely. I'll let you get back to work and I'll head over to Matthew's room."

"Good luck."

She leaned up and pressed a kiss to Alice's forehead, squeezing Alice's upper arms with a smile. Alice smiled back, a few tears drying on her cheeks, but she felt better than she had after the fight with Matthew. Time away from him, work provided by Mac, and Jean's familiar comfort had eased the tension headache in her shoulders and neck. Things were looking better; with Jean's help maybe this would turn out alright.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean has a talk with Matthew, Alice and Matthew let it all out to one another

Matthew sighed as he shifted on his hospital bed. His leg ached a bit, but at this point it was nothing to him. After the fight with Alice (that left an aching in his chest every time he thought of her), Matthew would gladly take the leg pain. He had wanted to go after her the second she left, but Alice had been right about his body telling him to quit. So instead of following her to apologize - or grovel at her feet - he'd remained on his bed, too shocked at her admission and in too much pain to go after Alice.

The past few days were quiet on his ward, far more quiet than they'd ever been in his time at the hospital. Most of the nurses still walked on eggshells around him - his proclivity for tantrums had gotten around as well as talk of the fight and Matthew couldn't blame them. The one that did talk to him (Ariel, lovely girl) had been short with him until he apologized for his earlier behavior.

" _Don't just apologize," she told him, "do better. That's all we want from you; that's all Alice wants from you."_

" _Have you seen her?" he asked the next day when Ariel was running him through some stretches from the physical therapist._

_Ariel nodded, a few blonde strands escaping from her simple bun, "She's still in town; Doctor Macmillan is working with her in the morgue."_

" _Really?"_

" _Yes, apparently Alice studied with the doctor years ago."_

_That made him smile, "She talked about a mentor… and now that I know Doctor Macmillan, I can see where Alice learned it all from."_

_Ariel smiled back, "We need more doctors like them. Rest, Mr. Lawson, I'm sure everything will turn out fine."_

" _Thank you, Ariel. I mean it."_

A knock on his door stirred him out of his musings and he looked up to see the one and only Jean Blake in the doorway.

"Am I interrupting?" she asked with a smile.

"No, please come in," he smiled back. "I never expected you to visit; I'd have thought Lucien would keep you plenty busy. Is he here too?"

Jean shook her head, "No, I came on my own. Lucien has too much work to do in Ballarat."

"Visiting Parks then?"

With a smile, Jean shook her head again, "No, no, not visiting Danny. I came here to talk to you."

The seriousness in her eyes gave him a better hint at why she'd shown up so suddenly and Matthew deflated a little. Shifting on the bed, he gingerly swung his feet out from under the covers and sat on the edge of the bed. Jean's eyebrows rose nearly to her hairline, but she watched as he simply sat there. He gestured to the chair by the bed in a silent invitation for Jean to sit down, but she remained where she was - rooted in the doorway of his room.

Drawing a hand over his face - trying to rub away the exhaustion, Matthew sighed, "You've spoken to Alice then?"

"Yes, I have." Jean walked closer to him, her voice soft, but Matthew felt very much like he had whenever his mother reprimanded him. "She told me you two fought."

He sighed again, "I messed up, Jean."

"Yes, you did, Matthew." His friend agreed as she finally sat in the chair next to his bed. Jean ducked her head to catch Matthew's gaze, "You took your frustrations of yourself out on someone who cares for you very much. She's someone who understands you enough to know why you did and she readily admits that she snapped too, but Alice is still hurt. You know she doesn't trust easily, Matthew."

"Yeah, I know, I pushed her away," Matthew hung his head in shame. He sniffed, trying to hold back the sudden tears welling up in his eyes. "I don't want to lose her, Jean."

"Then stop being a dickhead and apologize to her."

That startled a sharp laugh out him, "I'm trying." Jean simply raised an eyebrow in response and Matthew nodded, "I'll try harder, Jean."

"You'd better, Matthew, both of you deserve this. You've earned a little happiness in your life."

"I'm not so sure, Jean," Matthew shook his head. "Alice deserves better than a cripple for a soulmate."

"Is that what's holding you back? What brought on the fight?" At Matthew's half-shrug, Jean lightly shoved on his good knee in frustration. "Matthew Lawson, you are a bloody idiot!"

" _Jean_!"

"Oh, don't you ' _Jean_ ' me, you know I'm right. You think Alice doesn't deserve you because of your leg; don't you think  _Alice_  should have some say in this, Matthew?"

"Does she even want to think about it after how I've treated her?"

"I'm thinking about it right now," Alice's voice from the doorway startled both of them. A faint, sheepish smile spread across her face, "I know you said I didn't have to talk to Matthew today, Jean, but I couldn't stop thinking about it after you left."

Jean just smiled and patted Matthew's knee as she stood from the chair, "I'll leave you both to it then."

She stopped by Alice and squeezed her shoulder. "Let me know how it goes, Alice?" he heard her murmur and Alice nodded with a smile. Jean gave her a smile back - and one to Matthew over her shoulder - before she left, her heels clicking down the hallway.

Neither one of them spoke as Jean left. Matthew watched Alice, his fingers tapping out a nervous tattoo on the edge of his bed as her eyes roved over his face. She ducked her head and walked over to him. Gently patting the space next to him, Matthew let out the breath he'd been holding when she accepted his invitation without a word.

Alice wouldn't look at him, her hands fiddled with a loose button on her white coat with shaking fingers. It had taken a lot for her to come back to him after what he said and Matthew thought she was very brave to do it.

He'd have to be brave for her and take the next step.

"I felt a few bumps and scrapes in the past few days."

* * *

Alice didn't meet his eyes, "I've been distracted this week."

His fingers - gentle, but shaking with his nerves - reached out to curl softly around her wrist. She looked up at the sensation and smiled a little at the sheepish look on Matthew's face. He smiled back, knowing he was the reason behind her distraction.

His thumb gently stroked the heel of her palm; the calluses catching a little against the scars on her palms - the ones she got from his accident, the ones she used to try and make him see why she was here in Melbourne.

"Alice… I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for yelling at you, for not listening, for fighting the nurses… I'm so sorry for everything; I never should have said what I did and I never should have hurt you… But I did and I apologize for it."

She wriggled her hand around until she could lace her fingers with his - she'd missed the weight of them in their time apart. It felt right - her hand in his - it felt like coming home.

"It hurt, Matthew, when you said I never believed in the marking…" Alice finally spoke, her gaze fixed on their joined hands. "It hurt when you couldn't believe I'd keep coming back for any reason other than to see you, to help you. I thought of all people you'd understand me."

"I know and I'm sorry," he squeezed her hand and she finally looked up to see tears in his eyes, a few spilling over onto his cheeks. "God, Alice, I'm so sorry."

Her free hand came up and softly wiped away the tears, her thumb slowly tracing the jut of his cheekbone as her own tears fell. "I'm sorry too, Matthew, for snapping at you and yelling at you."

"Honestly I deserved it." Both of them laughed and Matthew leaned his forehead against Alice's as he continued, "You were right, Alice. I pushed myself too much when I should have been resting and I took out my frustration with my leg on you when you were coming from a place of concern."

Alice bit down on her lower lip as she gathered courage to ask her next question, "Was it just your frustrations about your leg or was it also something else?"

She leaned back and saw the dark look in his eyes at her question. It wasn't directed at her - she knew that now - and she knew that he thought she deserved better from overhearing him and Jean, but she wanted to hear it from him directly.

* * *

Matthew sighed, his eyes falling to rest on their joined hands. "It's… not just the leg, though it plays a part in it. I just… I feel like I don't deserve you, Alice. You are so smart and have so much potential; I feel like you're gonna be stuck with me and everything that comes with my leg and you'll come to regret it."

She shifted next to him, her hand gently cupping his chin and tilting his head up. He met her gaze; her eyes seemed to look right through him.

"Regret it?" she finally asked, her forehead wrinkled with confusion - that little furrow that he loved so much fixed between her eyebrows. "Why would I ever regret this, Matthew?"

"I dunno," he shrugged, not meeting her eyes, "I'm no good now. I've got a bad leg, no job, no purpose… I don't want to ruin your happiness."

"Matthew," the hand on his chin shifted until it cradled his cheek as she tried to get him to look at her, " _Matthew_ … Dearest, please look at me."

Heat flooded his cheeks at the term of endearment. He looked up to see tears in Alice's eyes, but he took the soft smile on her face to be a good sign.

"Matthew, the only way you'd ruin my happiness is the line of talk you're going down now. I love  _you_ , dearest… all of you and all the baggage that you come with - God knows I have plenty of my own to bring into all of this. I love you, Matthew, I don't regret that. I don't regret the marking or you being my soulmate; I do regret that I didn't tell you my suspicions sooner, that an accident almost took you from me and that you're in pain now, but I don't regret anything else. You're the one I was waiting for all these years. You are mine and I am yours… there's nothing to regret."

A few tears slipped down her cheeks and he gently brushed them away, his hand trembling (it matched the thrumming in his chest - Alice  _loved_ him). "I'm sorry, Alice."

"I know." She leaned in and kissed his lips and then his cheek before resting her head on his shoulder. "We still need to talk about all of this, though. I don't like fighting with you."

"I don't either, this week's been miserable." Matthew smiled when he felt her laugh silently next to him. "I'm glad you came back."

"Me too," she sighed.

"Does your offer from weeks ago still stand?"

"Hm?" Alice sat up and looked at him in confusion.

"Your offer," he smiled, "the one where you said you'd stay as long as I wanted you to… does it still stand?"

Realization dawned on her and Alice smiled back with a nod, "It does."

"Good… I'd like you to stay."

"And we'll talk?"

Matthew nodded, "About anything and everything if you want to, sweetheart."

"No more secrets?"

"No more secrets, no more doubting us. I love you, Alice. You're more than enough for me."

She leaned in and softly kissed him, smiling when he returned it, "You're more than enough for me too, Matthew."

With another brief kiss, Matthew situated himself into a more comfortable position on the bed. He opened his arms and smiled when she kicked off her shoes, shrugged out of her white coat, and laid down on his left, her head resting on his shoulder as they wrapped their arms around each other. It was a tight fit, in his small hospital bed, but they made it work.

They talked for hours, telling each other of their hard childhoods, of friends gained and lost over the years. They shared battle stories of abusive fathers and ostracization of their peers for being quiet and bookish. They talked of old dreams and new hopes for the future - their hopes for their relationship.

They told each other everything: the Orton case, the disciplinary hearings in Melbourne, their struggle to be accepted by their chosen careers, and the mentors that helped them along the way. Matthew told her of the night after the murder at the Colonist's Club, when he nearly reached out to her. Alice told him about the wandering hands and how she wanted to pack up and leave to find him once the Orton case was through. She told him stories of Temperance Buchanan, Doctor Macmillan, Phryne Fisher and the whole gang. Matthew gave her stories about Lucien, Jean, and Mattie - the precarious situations Lucien would get into with his loved ones prior to her arrival in Ballarat. She spoke of her schooling and the crescents of his nails showing up on her palms whenever someone got handsy and how it emboldened her to fight back; he voiced the worries he had of fighting in the war, how the small pinpricks of pain he got from her cat or her work kept him going through the tough weeks and months of his deployment.

At some point, they ran out of things to say and just laid there in silence. Alice's weight in his arms shifted and Matthew looked down to see her asleep against his shoulder. She still looked pale and exhausted, but sleep smoothed out some of the wrinkles around her mouth and eyes. He trailed a hand up and down her arm, soothing her when she shifted in his arms.

She really ought to get back to work, or leave before one of the hospital staff came in, but Matthew didn't have the heart to wake her. This week - and the weeks before - had been stressful on both of them, they deserved their rest for now. Pressing a featherlight kiss to her forehead and a soft "I love you", Matthew closed his eyes and joined her in slumber.

The world could wait awhile.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> set in 5.01 right before Matthew's return, this chapter is rated M for smut and it's all rahleeyah's fault. enjoy!

He limped his way up the front walk slowly, his leg aching a bit, but the dark green door called to him through the cool night. Matthew smiled at the thought of seeing her, of surprising her. She thought he wasn't coming back until tomorrow, but he had to see Alice.

His holdall in hand - maybe a bit presumptuous, but he didn't want to go to the hotel and then leave again - and leaning on his cane, Matthew took a breather once he reached Alice's door. Rapping on the door with his cane, he couldn't keep the giddy smile inching across his face as his heart raced in anticipation. He could hear rustling inside - the faint clinking of glass and the shift of fabric - as she approached the closed door. Nerves fluttered in his stomach ( _what if she wasn't happy to see him?_ ) but he pushed them from his mind with a shake of his head as he heard her shift on the other side of the door.

With a scrape and a dull 'thunk!', her door unlocked and swung open with enough force to bounce off the wall slightly as Alice stood there in shock.

He grinned and took in the sight of her after weeks apart; her face was devoid of make up, the ends of her newly shorn hair curling as they dried, but still a vibrant red (he liked it). She wore an aqua bathrobe that hung open to reveal a pajama top (he thought it looked familiar - it answered the mystery of where his spare one had disappeared to) and nothing else.

"Hi," Matthew smiled, laughing when she grabbed him by the lapels of his jacket and pulled him inside her flat. Before he could get another word in edgewise, Alice's lips firmly pressed themselves to his own and he vaguely felt the door close behind him as she pushed him up against the door.

He dropped his holdall and cane, his hands curling around Alice's hips tightly as she swiped her tongue along the seam of his lips. Groaning, Matthew pulled her even closer and nipped at her bottom lip - faintly tasting her wine - as her hands carded through his hair.

"I thought you weren't coming back until tomorrow," she murmured against his lips as his hands wandered up her back.

"Thought I'd surprise you," he grinned against the corner of her mouth, his lips pressed kisses along her jaw and the sensitive skin below her ear.

With a gasp, Alice tilted her head to give him better access, "Well I'm certainly surprised, Matthew. Careful… any mark you leave will show up on you too."

Matthew chuckled, "I'll keep that in mind."

Truth be told, he wouldn't have minded leaving a few marks on Alice's delectable skin, but heeding her advice, he avoided leaving any marks that wouldn't disappear in a few hours.

(Alright he might have left one where her neck met her shoulder, but that would be easily hidden by the collar of her clothes).

"You know," Matthew murmured against the skin of her throat, continuing after he felt Alice's hum vibrate against his lips, "when I came over here I wasn't expecting to end up necking like a couple of teenagers against your front door."

Alice drew back abruptly, her cheeks flushed and turned a brighter red as she met his eyes. The corner of her mouth twitched upward and both of them dissolved into a fit of giggles.

"You say that like you weren't enjoying it."

"Oh I definitely was enjoying it, sweetheart. You are a bloody tease."

Pressing a gentle kiss to his lips, Alice smiled, "Sorry, it was just a surprise to see you standing there and…"

"And I was just so devilishly handsome you had to drag me in here and give me a good ravishing?" Matthew supplied cheekily, a grin spreading across his face at Alice's laughter.

"Yes, exactly that."

His hands smoothed up and down her back; he'd missed her. It felt good to be home, to be back in Ballarat, to be here with her in the haven of her home.

She leaned in and kissed him again, "I missed you, Matthew."

"I missed you too," he kissed her back, feeling her hum into the kiss as she pressed her body up against his. "It's good to be back."

"It is," she murmured against his mouth, her arms winding around his neck as his hands left a heated trail on her skin through the borrowed pajama top. "Keep that up, dearest, and I might not let you leave."

Matthew groaned and caught her lips in a searing kiss, "If it weren't for my leg, sweetheart, I'd be carrying you to continue this conversation elsewhere."

"Forgive me, but I don't give a damn about your leg, Matthew," she nipped his lip, "I care about what you can do with other parts of your anatomy at the moment."

"You're going to be the death of me, Alice Harvey."

"I hope not, I have plans for you," Alice giggled and trailed her hands down his arms until she grasped his own that wandered up and down her back. Pressing a kiss to his pouting lips, Alice slipped out of his arms and pulled on his hands until he got the message and followed her, his hands coming to rest on her hips as she led them away from the front door.

Leaning heavily on Alice, Matthew pressed a kiss to the soft skin of her neck, grinning when she squirmed. "I like it… the hair," he told her as she pulled him towards the bedroom at the back of her flat.

"You do?"

He nodded, pushing her up against the wall next to her bedroom door and leaning in to leave a trail of kisses up and down her neck - nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin just below her ear, feeling the echoing sting of pain on his own neck. At Alice's gasp, Matthew chuckled, "Easier access to your neck."

"I… I can see the appeal," she muttered. Her fingers dug into his upper arms as he soothed the mark with his tongue. "Matthew-"

"Let me enjoy this, sweetheart," he said into the heated skin of her neck.

Alice laughed as she pressed closer to Matthew, "You're already enjoying it. I was merely going to suggest we continue this inside."

"Why?" He leaned back, admiring the flush to her cheeks and chest as she panted ( _he_ did that to her).

Alice just smiled and shook her head fondly, "I'm… I'm  _thoroughly_  enjoying this, Matthew, but I don't want you to hurt your leg. It's aching."

Matthew huffed a small sigh, irritated that his leg got in the way of a lot of things lately, but he knew Alice only wanted the best for him. Pressing a soft kiss to her parted lips, Matthew nodded, "You have a good point, sweetheart."

"I-I don't want you to think I don't want this, because I do, but-" she stammered out and he cut her off with a kiss. Alice hummed into it, her eyes fluttering closed as Matthew gently sucked on her bottom lip before he leaned his forehead on hers.

"I understand, Alice."

She smiled when he gently nuzzled his nose with hers, and it stayed when he pressed a kiss to her forehead. Keeping his hands on her hips, Alice opened her bedroom door and led him over to the bed. She shrugged out of her robe and tossed it over the trunk at the foot of her bed; she reached for his jacket with trembling fingers (' _Is she as nervous as I am about this shift in our relationship?'_  he wondered) and smiled when he pressed another kiss to her forehead as he pulled his arms out of the garment and tossed it on top of her robe.

She supported him as he toed out of his shoes. "You should sit," she told him in the dim of her bedroom - moonlight streamed in through her thin curtains and yellow light spilled from the hallway. They illuminated the outline of her face, the darkening of her eyes and Matthew couldn't help but stare.

"I will," Matthew finally dropped a kiss to the end of her nose, grinning when she ducked her head. He shuffled past her, limping to sit on the edge of her bed while she watched. Holding out a hand that shook with his nerves, Matthew smiled, "C'mere."

With a smile, Alice took his hand, letting him pull her until she stood between his legs. She ran her fingers through his hair - her smile widening as he leaned into the caresses. Matthew looked up at her, his eyes taking in the mussed hair, flushed freckled skin, and her general rumpled appearance.

"You're beautiful," he whispered, smiling when Alice bit her lower lip and ducked her head. "I mean it, sweetheart."

"I know you do, Matthew," she leaned down and pressed a kiss to his lips before drawing back - her fingernails lightly scratching at his scalp. "I'm still getting used to it, that's all."

Wrapping his arms around her waist, Matthew pulled her closer to him, grinning as he startled a laugh from her. "I'll make sure to tell you everyday."

A flash of her smile told him all he needed to know about Alice's thoughts. She wrapped her arms around his neck and shoulders as she very slowly straddled his lap - careful to keep her weight off his right leg - her eyes glittering in the moonlight.

"Is that a promise?" she asked him playfully, leaning in until their faces were inches from each other.

"One I intend to keep," he answered, sealing the promise with a kiss.

"Good," Alice smiled against his lips, "I look forward to it." Holding herself up by her thighs as her hands trailed around to the front of his shirt, Alice's fingers - no longer shaking - nimbly undid the top few buttons as she kissed him softly. "Now, Superintendent, you are far too dressed for my liking."

Matthew laughed richly, his hands smoothing over her waist and hips - still covered by his stolen pajama top - before they settled under her thighs. Feeling the strain in the muscles, his heart swelled at her affection to not cause him any unnecessary pain and Matthew kissed Alice - his tongue lazily meeting with hers - before he leaned back on the bed. "Should I get comfortable then?"

"Absolutely."

"Give me a second," he gently pushed her up off his lap, pressing a quick kiss to her pout as he shifted on her bed, pulling himself and shuffling along it until his back hit her headboard. "Good."

He caught her smiling in the low light of the room.

"Should I bring you pillows to prop yourself up, Superintendent?"

"Only if you think it'd be more  _comfortable_ , Doctor," he shot back, a chuckle dying in his throat as Alice climbed onto the bed and easily situated herself back on his lap. As her hands came up to cup his face, Matthew couldn't remember a more alluring sight than the sight of Alice Harvey sitting on his lap, dressed in his shirt (and  _only_  his shirt), while outlined in moonlight - her head haloed by the light of the hallway.

God, he loved her.

She returned her attentions to the buttons of his shirt as Matthew acquainted himself with the smooth skin of her thighs. Her hands yanked the ends of his shirt from the waistband of his trousers - Matthew had to lift himself up to help her with the back - and she finished with the buttons. He divested himself of the shirt, his movements hurried and interrupted frequently by Alice's distracting kisses.

She laughed as Matthew cursed under his breath at his arms getting caught in the sleeves of his own shirt. "Maybe I should just leave you like this."

Giggling at his annoyed glare, Alice pressed a kiss to his lips and between the two of them Matthew's shirt was thrown to the floor - quickly followed by his singlet. Matthew smiled against her mouth and left a trail of burning kisses down her throat as he began unbuttoning Alice's shirt, nipping and sucking at the soft skin as he went.

Alice ran her fingers through his hair before trailing them down his neck and shoulders. Everywhere she touched it felt like a fire under his skin as she traced every muscle, every scar on his torso - he couldn't get enough of her.

He jumped when he felt her get close to the belt buckle of his now uncomfortably tight trousers. "Wait."

Immediately, she stopped, pulling back in confusion as he lightly grasped her wrists to stop her. "What is it, Matthew?"

"It's…" he sighed and chewed on his inner cheek out of habit. "It's my leg… it's not a pretty sight, it can be disturbing."

"Matthew…" Alice gently pulled her wrists from his hands and tilted his chin up until he looked at her. "It's alright, Matthew; look." She guided one of his hands to her right thigh, moving it until he felt the slightly raised scar around her right knee - the one that mirrored his own.

"See?" She pressed a kiss to his mouth, urging him to explore the scar and surrounding skin while her hands gently cradled his face. "I love you, Matthew, leg and all. I want this and I want you… and I'll have you know something."

"What?" he whispered, his hands coming up to curl gently around her back.

"I'm not squeamish."

He leaned forward and kissed her with a smile. He trailed his hands up into her hair as she kissed him back.

"You are unlike any woman I've ever met, Alice Harvey."

She grinned, "I'm glad."

"I love you."

"And I you," she kissed him. "Are you alright?"

Matthew nodded, taking her hands and returning them to his belt buckle, "I am."

"If… if you want me to stop at any time, you'll tell me?"

He nodded again, pressing a kiss to her lips, "I will. I trust you, sweetheart. The same goes for you, we'll go as fast or as slow as you'd like."

Alice smiled and kissed him, "Okay."

It took a bit of maneuvering, but between the two of them, Matthew's trousers were pulled down his legs and off the bed along with his socks (" _If my feet get cold, I'm blaming you." "If you get cold, we're not doing this right."_ )

She crawled back up the bed, laughing when Matthew pulled her onto his lap.

"I think this is my new favorite place," he joked.

"I can imagine why."

"I like the view," Matthew shifted underneath her, his hands smoothing up and down her back as she laughed again. "It's a good view."

Alice leaned down and kissed him, her short nails digging into his shoulders when he sucked on her lower lip.

"I like my view too," she pressed another kiss to his lips with a smile.

"Good," he smiled against her lips. "Now… where were we?" His hands slid from her back to the buttons of her borrowed top and he slowly unbuttoned more of them as he kissed the newly exposed skin. Alice shivered as the cool air of her bedroom hit her heated skin when Matthew pulled the top down her arms and threw it on the floor next to her bed. When he nipped at her collarbone, her nails scored his shoulders and both of them groaned at the shared sensation of pain.

Alice arched against him, the heat of her sex seeping through the fabric of his shorts as he kissed the flushed skin of her chest. He swept his hands over her back, feeling her shiver as his calloused palms smoothed over her shoulder blades. Her breath hitched when his hands slid lower on her back and she tensed in his arms when he found the thin horizontal scars crosshatched on her skin.

He stopped and pulled back, "Everything alright?"

She cleared her throat, blinking rapidly to try to stop the tears from falling, "Yes… no. Oh, I don't  _know_ , Matthew."

"Easy, sweetheart," he moved his hands up to her shoulders, away from the scars, and leaned back to get a better look at her face. "We can take a break if you need it, Alice."

"I don't  _want_  to take a break, Matthew, I want you. I want this, I want us," Alice frowned.

"I want that too, but I don't want to rush you." He cradled her face in his hands, his thumbs tracing the line of her cheeks, smiling when she curled her hands around his and pressed a kiss to his palm. "And I don't want to hurt you."

"My father's the one who hurt me, dearest, not you."

"If you're sure."

Alice pressed another kiss to his palm and leaned forward to kiss his forehead, "I'm sure." She kissed him on the lips, sighing when he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her flush with his body, "I'm sure, Matthew."

Matthew nodded, his hands smoothing up and down her back - scars and all - as they kissed. There was still so much they had to learn about each other, even though they'd talked about it all weeks ago.  _Knowing_  that Alice's father had been physically abusive was one thing,  _feeling_  the physical reminders he'd left on his child's body was another, and Matthew longed to give Alice's father a piece of his mind. Alice shifted in his lap, and all thoughts of her father left his mind as his hips bucked up out of instinct. He felt her grin against his lips and he just nipped at her lower lip in response.

Trailing one of his hands down the heated skin of her back to curl around her hip, Matthew caressed her hipbone with his thumb. "May I touch you?" he asked quietly.

"Please," she kissed him, "oh please, Matthew." Alice guided his hand into her damp curls, gasping when she felt him explore her folds with gentle fingers - teasing her as she pressed down on his hand.

Matthew smiled and nipped at the skin of her throat, feeling her heartbeat fluttering rapidly underneath his lips at her pulse point as he slipped a finger inside of her. Alice moaned above him, her fingernails biting into his shoulders as he kissed the sensitive skin of her inner breast - nipping and sucking on the area until she let out a shuddering breath and he felt the sting of his actions on his own torso.

"Matthew Lawson," Alice sighed, her head falling back in pleasure, as he teased her clit with his thumb, "you are definitely a deviant."

He chuckled, "Only with you, sweetheart." He added another finger, starting a rhythm that had Alice whimpering in his arms. Her fingernails scored across his shoulders and he put firmer pressure on her clit in retaliation. She bore down on his hand and the hardness in his shorts with a faint moan.

"Oh,  _fuck me_ ," she whispered. Her walls tightened around his fingers and tension built up in her thighs as Matthew peppered her neck and shoulder with kisses. " _Fuck_ , Matthew."

"Come for me, sweetheart."

She tensed in his arms, her thighs squeezing tight as she pulled him up for a bruising kiss - all messy tongue and teeth. He swallowed her moan as she fluttered around his hand and trembled above him. They traded lazy kisses as she recovered. Matthew grinned when she shuddered as he removed his hand - her body still sensitive - and Alice smiled back.

"I'll say, Superintendent," she pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth and continued, "you know how to treat a girl."

He chuckled, "I'm glad you think so, Doctor."

Alice kissed him again, her nails lightly scratching at his scalp and he groaned at the sensation. Matthew drew back from the kiss, "However, there is a request I've yet to fulfill."

She raised an eyebrow in response.

He grinned, "I believe it was something along the lines of ' _oh, fuck me_ '?"

Alice laughed richly even as she blushed bright red from her ears to her shoulders, "Good of you to note it."

"With you? Always."

She kissed him again, arching into him when he dragged his own blunt nails down her back (mirrors of the burning trails ignited on either side of his spine and he wondered if it'd be like this every time - his mind spun at the thought of doing this more than once with Alice).

Alice trailed her lips from his mouth and along his jawline to his ear, "Lie back, Matthew."

At her urging, Matthew shifted until he was flat on his back. He took the opportunity to finally lose his shorts and when the heat of Alice's sex brushed up against his erection he had to bite back a groan.

"Ready?" she asked him quietly, her eyes dark as she watched him.

Matthew nodded, his hands curling around her hips as she braced herself on his chest and rose up on her knees. With his help, Alice slowly lowered herself down on him, her eyes closing in pleasure as she sighed. Matthew could scarcely breathe at the feeling of her heat.

"You feel incredible," he told her.

"So do you," Alice leaned down and kissed him. She rocked gently, setting a languid pace as his hands swept over her body - teasing her breasts, stroking the soft skin of her back and reveling in the strength of her thighs as she rode him. Sweat beaded on Alice's forehead, the skin beneath his hands grew slick with it as she picked up the pace - her warmth squeezing around him as she leaned down and kissed him again. She pressed a kiss to his chin, smiling against the flushed skin as she trailed her kisses down his throat, nipping and licking at his shoulder. He groaned, feeling it vibrate in his chest, as Alice sucked where his neck met his shoulder - leaving her own mark as he had marked her earlier in the evening.

She gently kissed it when she was done, "You're mine."

"And you're mine, sweetheart," he kissed her, sloppy and fevered as she gyrated above him. She hummed into the kiss, her fingers twining in his hair as his thumb moved from her hip to circle around her clit - urging her higher and higher. Her fingers tightened in his hair, pulling as her hips ground down against his cock and hand, chasing the bliss of a second orgasm, while Matthew could only think about her heat and the feeling of her body moving against his.

"Sweetheart."

"I'm with you," she panted against his lips, "I'm with you, let go. Let go, dearest."

He thrust up into her, feeling her shudder around him as his thumb flicked against her clit. Her thighs tightened at his sides as her head snapped forward and she came with a shout. Her walls clenched around him and he pulled her down, his arms wrapping around her tight as his hips stuttered up into her warmth and he came with a groan.

Rolling to his side and slipping out of her in the process, Matthew pressed a kiss to Alice's forehead. With shaking fingers, he brushed her hair out of her face and smiled when she nuzzled into his hand. They lay side by side, panting - their bodies slick with sweat and the sheets tangled around their legs.

Alice pressed a kiss to his bare chest, "Worried about your feet getting cold still?"

Matthew huffed a laugh, "Not now, no."

"Good," she pressed another kiss to his chest before she sat up. "Stay here," Alice smiled, "I'm going to get something to clean up a bit."

"I'll stay as long as you want me to, Alice."

She leaned down and kissed him, her tongue meeting his in a gentle caress. Matthew marveled at the heat behind it even though both of them were thoroughly exhausted. "I'll hold you to it, Matthew."

She stretched as she stood (Matthew admired the way the muscles of her back shifted as she moved - she really was a remarkable woman) and walked into her bathroom, returning shortly with a damp towel that he cleaned himself with as she picked up their discarded clothes and draped them over her robe and his jacket on the trunk at the foot of her bed.

When she moved towards the bathroom again, Matthew frowned, "Where are you going?"

Alice smiled over her shoulder, "Painkillers. You might not feel it now, but your leg will need them before the morning. Doctor's orders," she smirked at his exasperated sigh. "You'll thank me in the morning."

"I've learned my lesson in listening to you, sweetheart."

"I hope so!" she called from the bathroom, returning with a glass of water and some tablets for him to take.

He dutifully took the painkillers and downed the water while she took the towel back into the bathroom. Setting the empty glass on her bedside table, Matthew straightened out the sheets and got comfortable in her bed - holding out his arms to Alice when she reappeared in the doorway.

She let out a soft laugh and easily fell into his arms under the sheets, humming contentedly and tucking her head under his chin when he wrapped her in an embrace.

"Alice," he whispered. She hummed and he took it as a sign he could continue, "the scars on your back… your father?"

* * *

Alice shifted in his arms, her hands drew nonsensical designs on his chest as she sighed. "Yes," she finally answered quietly, "they're his handiwork. He usually used whatever he could find in one of his rages, but this was the time he had me go out and find my own switch. It was one of the last times I let him beat me. They hadn't healed by the time I left."

His arms tightened around her shoulders and he pressed a kiss to the crown of her head. "I'd like to have a few words with him."

Alice smiled, ever grateful this man had come into her life. "You'd have to get in line. I'm not even sure he'd be alive by the time I'm done with him. Mac and Phryne would like a go at him too… maybe Lucien and Jean... I'm not even sure he's still alive."

His hands smoothed over her upper back and she hummed into the crook of his neck. Matthew kissed her forehead, "Then I'll dig him up and have a few words with his corpse. I've dug up a grave before."

Alice laughed, remembering their first meeting when he and Lucien were muddied beyond recognition in her morgue. "I don't think that'd be necessary, Matthew, but I appreciate the thought."

Her fingers traced the outline of a scar on his side, "I don't recall this one."

Matthew grunted and squirmed slightly under her light touch (it seemed they were both ticklish), "Remember McAvoy?"

"I do."

"His work," Matthew sighed. "I fought back once and he graduated from fists to a knife. He only took a swipe at me before the fight got broken up by his mates. Vera took me to Lucien's father and she was madder than hell about it."

Alice sat up and looked closer at the scar, noting the length and position of it, before she looked up at him, "You're lucky it was a swipe and not a stab, Matthew. This could have been serious."

He nodded, "Yeah, it could have been, but Lucien's old man patched me up well enough that my parents didn't even notice - Vera fixed my clothes from that day and got rid of the blood. Luckily, that was the last time that term McAvoy tried it with me. We graduated and I went to the police academy in Melbourne, so I didn't have to see him again until the principal died."

Alice frowned, "He's lucky he'll never meet me."

Matthew grinned, "Gonna threaten him with a bone saw?"

She smiled and laid back down in his arms, "I was thinking scalpel this time." Matthew laughed richly and she pressed a kiss to his lips.

"There's my Lady of Death," he whispered against her mouth. "My champion."

"Flatterer."

He gave her a boyish grin and she giggled. This felt right, this felt good, having him here in her bed with his hair sticking up and his arms around her. He was back in Ballarat, where he belonged, and a missing puzzle piece in Alice's little found family clicked back into place. There were still things to figure out about each other, how they'd go from here, how they'd tell people -  _if_  they'd tell people - but for now Alice was content to share her bed with the man she loved for as long as she could before work pulled her away the next day.

Matthew pressed another kiss to her lips and then her forehead when she yawned. She could feel him smiling against her skin, "Sleep, sweetheart, we'll talk more in the morning."

"'Kay," she kissed his cheek, chin, and chest as she settled in his arms. "Love you."

"Love you too," he whispered into her hair, his arms tightening around her as they both drifted off into slumber. Matthew's breathing evened out just as she was about to drop off and Alice smiled.

This was perfect.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> here we are, folks, at the last chapter of Wounded Hearts! this isn't the last you'll see of this au, I've got plenty planned for it, but for now, enjoy the end of this particular story for these two. I'd like to extend my extreme gratitude to all who've read this and commented, I love each and every one of you and thank you for encouraging me on this story. To Leah, thank you so much for writing A Messy Kind of Love, for without it, Wounded Hearts would have never happened. To Ariel, for being my cheerleader and a constant friend when I needed it, thank you so much. Much love - Dee

She woke to the weight of an arm across her waist. It wasn't a new sensation - she and Matthew had shared a bed before, in the hospital and in the week of leave she took at his small flat in Melbourne after the Alderton fiasco was over - but it was still new enough that it took her by surprise when she first woke. She shifted and heard Matthew snuffle a bit in his sleep. His arm slid from her waist and she turned to find him lying on his back - his other arm still under her neck.

Propping herself up on her elbow, Alice watched him sleep with a smile. He looked better, much better than he had after his accident and the months spent in hospital. Sleep lessened some of his wrinkles, and she traced the lines around his mouth and eyes with a featherlight touch. He stirred under her fingers, but didn't wake. Pressing a light kiss to his cheek, Alice got up from the bed and shrugged on the pajama top she'd borrowed from Matthew weeks ago in Melbourne.

She tidied up their clothes at the foot of her bed and took his jacket to hang up by her door. Noting the dropped holdall and cane by the front door, Alice smirked. She hefted the bag up off the floor and brought it and the cane back into her bedroom. Leaning the cane up against the bedside table, Alice put his bag next to their clothes and climbed back onto the bed. She sat at Matthew's side, drinking him in as he snored lightly - blissfully dead to the world and Alice's gaze.

She smiled as she looked at him, her eyes slowly drifting over his sleeping face, his bare chest, and the muscles of his arms (Alice was very glad she'd studied classics alongside her medical classes in university - she appreciated well-defined musculature and Matthew had  _very good_  musculature). Her rumpled sheet pooled around his hips and Alice felt her cheeks warm before she turned her attention to the faint scars adorning his body. Some were familiar - she'd felt when he got them - and others were the products of his childhood. She reached out and traced a few of them, her mind drifting back to the times when she felt the pain - one had happened in the middle of a lecture hall and it was mildly embarrassing to cry out like she did from the shock, but the bullet graze had  _hurt_.

"You're up early," Matthew's voice - low and rumbling - broke through her thoughts.

"Habit," she answered softly, not wanting to break the comfortable spell over her bedroom. "Sleep well?"

Matthew nodded, his eyes still closed, but he shifted closer to her on the bed. "Like a log. You?"

"Like the dead," she grinned when he chuckled at her little joke. "Need anything?"

* * *

Matthew opened his eyes and rubbed the sleep out of them as Alice's hand continued to map out his body. Capturing her wandering hand when it got a little too close to his ticklish sides (not that he'd admit it), he tugged on it. She laughed softly and scooted closer to him, lying down with her head on his shoulder.

"I don't need anything, sweetheart," he answered, his thumb rubbing across her knuckles. Lifting her hand up and pressing a kiss to the palm - right over her scars - he smiled, "Work today?"

Alice shook her head, "We did the autopsy yesterday and I'm waiting on test results. I'm on call today, so they'll ring if I'm needed."

"So I've got you all to myself?"

"Until the phone rings, yes."

He sighed theatrically and Alice laughed. "You were planning on going to the station today, Matthew, or have you forgotten?"

"No, you're just more fun than Bill Hobart."

Alice threw her head back and laughed like he hadn't seen since he'd returned from his demotion nearly a year ago. "You're terrible!"

Matthew smiled; he rolled onto his side and slid his arms around Alice as she laughed. He'd missed this - the intimacy of waking up to her, the luxury of time together in bed. Their one week together when he was out of hospital and she'd come to stay after everything with Alderton hadn't been enough for him. In such a short time, Matthew had gotten used to the warmth of her body next to his, of her hand curling around his arm as they slept, and the tornado of her red curls against his pillows. This morning felt familiar, echoing their mornings in Melbourne, and he felt like he was home.

Of course, it was Alice's home and bed they curled up in, and he didn't want to assume. There was still much to talk about - more than what they'd whispered in the dark of his small flat in Melbourne as they learned how to live with each other in a shared space - but they had time now. Previously, their time together had been in snatches of visiting hours and coinciding days off; it was precious in the fact they'd tried to squeeze out every drop that they could. Now that he was back - for good, the higher ups were sure in that regard - they didn't have to rush. No deadline loomed over their heads for once.

"Penny for your thoughts?" she asked him, her hands cupping his face.

"Just enjoying this," he smiled.

Alice smiled back and gently kissed him, "Me too."

Nuzzling her nose with his, Matthew pressed a kiss to her lips, "Think I can convince you to take a sick day, then?"

She laughed against his mouth, "You can certainly try."

"I think I will." Matthew grinned and cut off any retort Alice might have had with a kiss and rolled her underneath him on the bed.

* * *

She'd never get tired of kissing him, she mused as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. He was just so good at it - so good at reading her already - when they kissed. Their journey had been a slow climb to where they were now and it shouldn't surprise her that Matthew was so good at reading her. He'd always seen right down to her core from the beginning, just as she was able to see through him. They'd danced around each other even before their bond had been revealed, akin to a waltz and she smiled.

"What is it?" Matthew asked.

"Just thinking."

"Is this the kind of thinking that gets us into trouble?" He grinned when she narrowed her eyes at him.

Alice tried to glare up at him, but she let out a laugh at his dimpled, boyish grin, "No, I was thinking about us and something Miss Fisher once said."

"What about?"

"That a good waltz is 'slow and close'... I don't know why it reminds me of us, but it does."

Matthew leaned down and kissed her, "I can see the connection, sweetheart. A waltz requires trust, concentration, and effort on both parties to perform. It's also timeless."

Alice felt her cheeks warm at Matthew's quiet response, at the implication of his words. "I like that."

"Me too."

She pulled him down for another kiss, sighing contently at the weight of his body on hers. "I love you, Matthew."

"I love you too, Alice." His mouth moved from her lips to her jaw, nuzzling and kissing as he went. "Have I told you that I like the new hair?"

Alice chuckled as his hands slid up and he wove his fingers into the tangled strands, "I remember you mentioned it a few times last night. Something about 'it was easier to reach my neck', I believe?"

He growled and lightly tugged on her hair to tilt her head back - his mouth kissing and nipping at her throat; she squirmed underneath him as his stubble scratched against the sensitive skin - feeling his chuckle more than hearing it.

"I also like you in this shirt," Matthew mumbled as he pressed a kiss to the hollow of her throat. "I wondered where it had gone."

"You gave it to me," Alice gasped out.

" _Leant it_ ," he nipped at her collarbone. "You were supposed to give it back."

"You didn't ask for it back."

* * *

"What cheek!" Matthew kissed down her sternum, his hands moving from her hair to her sides. He grinned when he saw the darkening marks he'd left on her the night before (as well as one that was fainter - a blotchy red instead of the purplish-red like all the others - and he knew that one was all Alice's doing, at least he had a collar high enough to hide it). Her skin warmed beneath his lips, a pretty pink flush spreading across her chest as he opened up the stolen pajama top further.

Alice's fingers curled in his hair and she let out a breathy sigh, "Matthew."

"Yes?"

"Don't start something you might not have time to finish."

He laughed against her skin, feeling her squirm underneath him. "I'm  _trying_  to convince you to stay home… is it working?"

The fingers tightened in his hair, nails lightly scratching at his scalp as Alice sighed again.

"I'm taking that as a yes."

" _Matthew_."

He grinned and slid his hands up under her top - her skin smooth and warm under his palms. Lightly tickling her sides, Matthew chuckled when she tried to wriggle out from underneath him. "I didn't know you were ticklish, sweetheart."

"Like you aren't," she shot back, giggling when he tickled her again. " _Matthew Lawson_."

"Alright, alright. I'll stop." He kissed his way back up to her mouth and rolled onto his side. Grimacing at the twinge in his leg, Matthew jumped when he felt Alice's hand on his thigh.

Her other hand cupped his cheek, "Sore?"

"A little," Matthew leaned in and kissed her gently to reassure her. "I can live with it."

Alice nodded, her thumb caressing his cheek as she looked down at his right knee. "May I?" she asked quietly.

This was the first time she'd seen the scar around his knee -  _really_  seen it. She had a corresponding scar on her own body, but it wasn't quite the same as seeing it on him.

Turning to kiss her palm, Matthew nodded. She leaned in and kissed his lips, a gentle kiss that he barely felt before Alice sat up slowly to study his knee. Her fingers were hesitant - fleeting touches over the raised scar and surrounding muscle that made him shift on the bed until her hand rested on his knee, stilling his movements while she traced the edges of the scar.

"It's strange," she remarked quietly.

"What is?"

"I know this scar, I have it on my own body and I've studied it, but it's… odd to be familiar with it and yet not at the same time." Alice's fingers moved over the tiny stitch marks around the scar, her intense eyes taking in every detail. Her hands mapped it out; calloused palms felt the tense muscles below his skin, and her cool fingers searched out every nook and cranny. "Does the actual scar itself hurt, or am I just feeling the muscles spasming when it hurts?"

He reached down and curled his hand around her knee - the one that carried his scar - and squeezed lightly. "From what Lucien said and Mac told me, the actual nerves where they stitched it all back together are shot, I don't feel anything at the scar itself anymore. It's the muscles, healing and relearning everything, that causes the pain."

"So you can feel my hand here," she gently rubbed above his knee - above the scar, "but not here?" The fingers of her other hand traced over the scar as she asked.

"Basically."

"Is there any way to make it better? To make you not hurt as much, I mean."

Matthew shrugged, "Mac mentioned exercises to strengthen the leg; it's what we were going to start on when I got called before the higher brass and sent back here."

Alice leaned down and pressed a kiss to his knee before she laid back down in his arms, "I can ask her about them if you'd like."

Matthew held her close and kissed her forehead, "She's going to call later this week, but thank you, sweetheart."

She smiled and kissed him right as her telephone rang. Alice sighed and rested her forehead against his chest, "Back to work…"

"Looks like it."

She pressed a kiss to his chest and another to his cheek, "I'll be right back. It might not be a work call."

He watched her go and heard her answer the call out in the living room. She talked for a bit and he heard her hang up the telephone before her front door opened. It closed and Alice walked back in to the room with a newspaper tucked under her arm as she sorted through her post.

"Do you have to go in?" He asked.

Alice nodded and sat down next to his hip, her eyes still on the envelopes in her hands. When he shifted she put his hand on his chest. "Don't get up, dearest, maybe you can get some more rest before you go to the station."

Matthew smiled and pulled her to him - post and all - to steal a kiss. "I'd get more rest if you were here with me."

Alice laughed lightly. "I'll bet. Unfortunately, the test results have come in as well as Mickey Ellis' medical records. Lucien will want to see them, so I have to get up I'm afraid."

He stole another kiss and let her sit up, "Ah, well, back to the real world I suppose."

"Mm-hm," she hummed. "I'm serious about you getting more rest, Matthew, you need it."

He leaned in and pressed a kiss to the side of her head, "I concede defeat, sweetheart, you wore me out."

" _I_ wore  _you_  out?" Alice gave him an incredulous look.

"Mm-hm," Matthew mimicked her hum, pressing a kiss to her cheek to make her smile. "You did."

"You're a silly man," she kissed him. "I'm going to get ready, need anything?"

"Can I read the paper?"

"Only if you leave me the crossword," Alice smiled and handed over the paper as she got up.

Matthew smiled and unfolded it as Alice put the post out on her kitchen table and puttered around her room. She pulled out clothes for the day and Matthew peered over the top of the paper to watch her get ready.

"You're staring," she told him as she pulled on her slip over her underwear.

"It's a nice view."

Alice laughed and sat down on the edge of the bed to pull on her stockings, "You're in a mood this morning, Matthew."

He smiled and turned his attention back to the paper as she finished dressing. Her heels clipped on the hardwood floors as she walked into her bathroom. When he looked up again at the sound of her footsteps, Alice had styled her hair (straightening out the curls and waves), and applied her make up for the day. Matthew noticed she'd picked a blouse that covered up the marks he'd left last night and he smirked.

Alice narrowed her eyes at him, knowing exactly what he was thinking about, "I'm very glad I have blouses with high enough collars." She walked over and sat down next to his hip as he set the newspaper aside. "If Lucien sees any of these, we'll never hear the end of it."

Matthew chuckled, "Lucien forgets the amount of times I've seen love bites on him from his wife after they got married."

She laughed and leaned in to gently kiss him, careful to not mess up her lipstick. Matthew curled his fingers beneath her chin and kissed her more firmly. Alice sighed into the kiss and into his arms.

Resting her forehead against his after drawing back, Alice sighed again, "I have to go."

"I know," He kissed her again, one last time, and let her sit up. "I'll see you later?"

Alice nodded with a smile, "We can have lunch here and then I can drop you off at the station if you'd like."

"Sounds perfect," Matthew smiled back.

"Good." Alice pressed a kiss to his cheek, "Rest, dearest. I'll be back before you know it."

"I look forward to it." He opened the paper back up as Alice touched up her lipstick, collected her things, and left for work. Their domesticity was comforting and pleasant, and Matthew looked forward to more mornings like this.

* * *

" _So… Frank Carlyle?"_

" _Oh, he's in a world of trouble."_

Lucien sighed and gestured to Matthew's leg as his old friend stood up from the desk. "And your…?"

Matthew smiled at him, "Oh, it's perfectly fine."

"Good… good…" Lucien smiled. Matthew turned his head and Lucien caught sight of a tell-tale sign of a love bite right below his ear (he hadn't seen one on Alice, her hair must have hidden it). He looked to see if anyone was listening in before he leaned in towards Matthew. "Alice know you're back?"

Matthew's cheeks and ears turned pink as he avoided Lucien's gaze.

Lucien grinned, "I see."

"Ah, shove off, Blake." Matthew narrowed his eyes at him, but it did nothing to dissuade the warm feeling in Lucien's chest at his two friends finding their happiness - nor did it stop the grin spreading on his face.

"That explains Alice's good mood this morning."

" _Blake_ ," Matthew ground out. "I'm warning you."

Lucien held his hands up in defeat, "I'm stopping, Matthew. I just wanted to say that I'm happy for the two of you, that's all. Though she might want to… aim her love bites a little lower." He gestured right below his ear.

Matthew's ears burned brighter and he coughed, "She did… uh, that one is mine… on, uh… on her."

"Matthew Lawson, you dog."

His old friend simply glared at him and limped out of the station, grumbling. Lucien caught "Alice" and "scalpel" and ducked his head to hide his grin.

"Don't you have work to do, Blake?" Matthew shot over his shoulder.

"Yes, yes, I do." Lucien laughed and followed Matthew out of the station to meet Charlie at the car. Matthew was back, Alice was happy, and there was a murder to solve. Everything was right as rain in Ballarat.

* * *

Alice poured over the test results and Mickey Ellis' medical records. Once her and Lucien had come to the conclusion that the boxer died from poisoning, she'd sent off his blood for analysis. They knew it was poison, just not which one. She still waited to hear back about the powder on the man's trousers as well as the presumed Plaster of Paris; the lab assured her they'd get to the samples as soon as possible with their limited staff as a rash of colds had felled most of the toxicology department.

Knuckles rapping lightly on the frosted glass door made her look up. Matthew smiled as he pushed the mortuary door further open, "Am I interrupting?"

"Not at all, I was just seeing if there was anything Lucien and I missed." Alice smiled.

"Waiting on more results?" He walked in, his cane tapping on the tiled floor.

Alice nodded, "Toxicology is a bit understaffed, but I'm hoping the results will be in tomorrow. What can I do for you, Superintendent?"

Matthew held up the newspaper, "I promised that I'd leave you the crossword, Doctor Harvey."

She laughed and stood from her stool to take the paper from his hand as he took off his hat and hung it by the door. "Why, thank you."

"It's been awhile since I've been down here," Matthew remarked.

"Not since before the accident," Alice nodded.

"Actually I was thinking of about a week before that," he smiled. "When I was angry at Munro and uh…"

He blushed and Alice thought it was adorable. She took the newspaper out of his hand and leaned up against the autopsy table. "You mean when you pinned me against this table and nearly kissed me?"

His blush deepened, "Bloody hell, Alice."

Alice laughed and leaned in to kiss his cheek, "You're easy to tease, Matthew."

"You don't play fair." He stepped closer to her, his hand coming up to rest on her hip. He smirked when he heard her breath catch in her throat as he pressed her back against the autopsy table. "Y'know, we could reenact it right now, sweetheart."

Alice hummed, "Really?"

"Mm-hm," Matthew leaned in close, his nose bumping against hers, "but we won't because this is your workplace and someone could interrupt." He dropped a kiss on her cheek and stepped back. Alice swatted at his chest with the newspaper and he laughed at her little huff of indignation.

"You are the worst, Matthew."

"You don't play fair,  _I_  don't play fair." He limped over to the other stool and dragged it over to hers. Sitting down with a groan, Matthew looked over the files she had spread out on the table. "I did come here to ask you to catch me up on the test results, but…"

"They aren't back yet," she nodded, completing his thought. Alice slid back onto her stool next to him and put the newspaper to the side. "I could answer any questions you might have, but I think Lucien already told you everything."

Matthew smiled, "He did, in the way he usually does, but thank you for the offer, Alice. Do you have any questions?"

She shook her head with a smile, "No, I don't think so. I'd ask why the fact that two men pummeling each other is a sport, but I don't think I want to know."

"You don't like boxing?"

"No, it doesn't make any sense to me." She shrugged. "Seems like unnecessary violence."

"Do you like any sports?"

Alice shrugged again, "I don't know, they've never appealed to me so I never really learned about them. You?"

"Lucien's the boxing enthusiast, I prefer cricket," he smiled. "But I like my quiz shows and movies more."

"I've never been."

"To quiz shows or to the cinema?"

"Both."

"Would you like to go?"

"Are there lots of people?"

Matthew gave her a half-shrug, "There can be."

Alice frowned, "I'm not so sure about that."

"It's alright, sweetheart," he leaned over and pressed a kiss to her cheek. "We can try the shows and cinema when you feel comfortable about them. In the meantime, we'll find other things to do."

Alice smiled and lightly kissed him on his mouth, wiping away a small trace of lipstick with her thumb. "Like this crossword puzzle?"

Matthew smiled as she opened up the newspaper to the puzzle and put away the folders on the table. He pulled out a pencil from his jacket pocket, "I think we can afford a little break from work."

Alice scooted her stool closer to his and they bent their heads over the crossword. Conversation passed easily between them as they worked on the puzzle, alongside teasing suggestions for answers from both of them just to rile each other up. Matthew's hand was warm in hers (she'd grabbed it to stop him from trying to take the pencil out of her hand and write his own answers - he'd still taken it with a triumphant " _ha_!" and that was when Alice found out he was left handed).

He filled in the squares of a few answers, a smug smile tugging one the corners of his mouth as he worked. Alice rubbed the knuckles of his right hand with her thumb - tracing the familiar scars on them. Leaning in, she pressed a kiss to his cheek.

"What's that for?" Matthew asked softly, his pencil poised over the next box.

"No reason." When he raised an eyebrow, Alice smiled. "It's just…"

"What?"

"I like watching you work. It's fascinating."

"Really?" Matthew put the pencil aside and turned to face her fully, their joined hands coming to rest on his lap.

She nodded, "You get this look on your face when you know the answer, it's hidden well, but your smug smile gives it away. It's just… it's fascinating to watch you work."

Matthew smiled, "Thank you, sweetheart." He kissed her cheek, "I like to watch you work too."

"You do?"

"Mm-hm," He kissed her cheek again, "you get this little wrinkle between your eyebrows when you're concentrating, right here." Matthew kissed her forehead, smiling when she giggled. "I love watching your mind work. You're so very smart."

Alice curled a hand around the back of his neck as she pulled him in for a kiss. "So are you, dearest." Matthew kissed her back, his arms sliding around her waist as he pulled her closer; her hands clutched at his shoulders.

"Aren't you worried about someone interrupting?" she asked him quietly.

"They can all go hang," he muttered against her lips, muffling her laughter with a kiss.

"I can come back later," Rose's teasing voice made them jump apart and they turned to see her standing in the doorway. She leaned up against the doorjamb, her body language relaxed, but the smile on her face was warm and teasing. "You two look like you're quite busy."

"Rose-" Matthew frowned, but he stopped at Alice's hand on his chest. Looking at her with raised eyebrows, Matthew sighed when Alice shook her head.

She turned to his niece, "Something happen?"

Rose straightened and looked down at her feet, "Maybe? But I'm serious, Alice, I can come back later."

* * *

Matthew looked back and forth between his niece and Alice - evidently this was not the first time Rose had come down to the morgue to visit his soulmate. He relaxed and smiled; he liked the idea that they'd gotten comfortable around each other, that Rose had accepted Alice.

' _One less family member to accept her_ ,' he mused.

Clearing his throat to get the attention of both of them, Matthew grabbed his cane, "Actually, I should be heading back to the station. I'll leave you two to it." He winked at Rose and she grinned.

Alice smiled as he stood, it widened when he leaned over to kiss her cheek. "Will you stop by later? After work?" she asked softly.

"Depends on how late I'll be, sweetheart, but I'll call," he pressed another kiss to her cheek. Straightening, Matthew walked over to the door and paused by Rose. She looked up at him expectantly, and he put a hand on her shoulder. "Thank you, Rose." He spoke soft enough for her to hear.

"For what?"

"For getting to know Alice even though you didn't have to."

Rose looked over to Alice - still seated at the autopsy table - and back up at him with a smile. "She's important to you. I had to make sure she was right for you too… getting to know her was an added benefit. I like her… she's refreshingly honest."

Matthew chuckled, "How often have you visited?"

His niece shrugged, "A lot. I first started coming to figure her out, and then I started coming to vent about my life… Alice is a good listener and I like her advice. She asked about you, what you were like when I was growing up… so of course I told her only the most embarrassing stories."

He rolled his eyes as Rose grinned, " _Rose._ "

"I  _like_  her, Uncle Matthew. She's good for you," Rose nudged him. "You should get going. But, uh, before you go…"

"What?"

"I'm not sure red's your color," she motioned to her mouth with a teasing grin, a laugh bubbling up when Matthew cursed under his breath. She fished out a handkerchief and handed it over, "Here, you can return it later."

"Thank you, Rose." Matthew smiled and kissed her forehead.

"You're welcome, now shoo! We're having girl talk!"

Matthew laughed and grabbed his hat before Rose gently pushed him out of the morgue. Before the door fully closed behind him, he heard Alice's voice.

" _What's wrong in the world of Rose Anderson today?"_

" _What_ _ **isn't**_   _wrong? But I'll start with Charlie."_

" _Put your foot in it? I saw the article."_

" _Oh, don't you start too."_

He grinned and whistled softly as he limped away from the morgue up into the hospital. Those two were going to be trouble one of these days.

* * *

Alice looked up from her book when she heard the front door close. Matthew's distinctive step drew closer to the bedroom and she smiled when he appeared in the doorway.

"Find the spare key alright?" she asked him quietly.

He nodded with a sigh, "It was right where you said it was, thank you. I put it back when I unlocked the door."

She watched silently as he slowly stripped out of his uniform and folded it neatly for tomorrow's use. When Matthew caught her watching, Alice looked back down at her book with feigned interest - her cheeks burning when he smirked.

"What are you still doing up, sweetheart?" Matthew asked as he limped around to the other side of the bed.

"I wanted to see if you needed anything," she shrugged. "That and this book is actually quite good."

Matthew smiled and drew back the covers. He slid under them and pulled himself over to her side. Alice lifted her arms without looking away from her book and he rested his head on her chest. Slumping into her embrace and wrapping his arms around her middle, Matthew sighed.

"Need anything?" she shifted the book to one hand, the fingers of the other softly carding through his hair.

He sighed again and shook his head slightly, "Nah, I've got all I need here."

She smiled and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. Setting the book to the side, Alice wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "You should sleep, Matthew, this case was a long one."

"So should you, sweetheart." He shifted in her arms to get comfortable. Alice ran her fingers through his hair - lightly scratching at his scalp - and he felt his eyes start to droop. "Alice?"

"Hm?"

"Do you think it'd be alright if I stay here for a bit? I have a room at a hotel, but I'd like to spend some more time with you… if that's alright with you."

Alice was quiet for some time, but her fingers still moved through his hair - lulling him into a half-asleep state. He felt her press a kiss to the top of his head and she tightened her arms around him. "That's perfectly alright, Matthew, for you to stay here. My bed is big enough for two."

_Fin_


End file.
